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Old Mar 27, 2009, 07:44 PM
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What exactly determines virginity? Some believe that you can mess around with oral sex and still be a virgin b/c you havent experienced intercourse. while others think anything beyond kissing is sex.

what say you?

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  #2  
Old Mar 27, 2009, 09:50 PM
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Virginity is lost when one has had sexual intercourse with another person.
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Old Mar 27, 2009, 10:01 PM
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i think the concept of virginity is somewhat archaic and irrelevant these days.

technically, it does mean sexual intercourse. but that means a whole population (gay/lesbian couples) are still virgins, even though they are definitely sexing it up!

i think virginity probably only matters if you are religious and are meant to not have sex before marriage, in which case you should be following the intent of the law (no sexual contact), instead of trying to get into the nitty gritty of what is/isn't permissible.
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Old Mar 27, 2009, 10:07 PM
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i was just a'wonderin
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Old Mar 27, 2009, 10:20 PM
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Originally Posted by deliquesce View Post
technically, it does mean sexual intercourse. but that means a whole population (gay/lesbian couples) are still virgins, even though they are definitely sexing it up!
In the concept of being sexual I agree with you... but we have to remember that the word "virgin" was original created to describe the heterosexual unmarried maiden - a female that kept her garden (the vaginal area) a secret and untouched until her wedding night.

Many young folks are trying to return to those days of secrecy and I applaud them.
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Old Mar 27, 2009, 10:25 PM
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oh, darling, not criticising you for asking at all!

i think it's a good conversation for people to have. i'm just tired of the old view that losing your virginity means having a penis inserted into your vagina. like -- gross, when you look at it that way.

i was just offering a different point of view .
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Old Mar 27, 2009, 10:31 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Rhapsody View Post
In the concept of being sexual I agree with you... but we have to remember that the word "virgin" was original created to describe the heterosexual unmarried maiden - a female that kept her garden (the vaginal area) a secret and untouched until her wedding night.

May young folks are trying to return to those days of secrecy and I applaud them.
yeah - that's why i was saying the idea of virginity is outdated. it doesn't bear much reference to how things are done these days.

and if you want to go by why the word was created - then losing your virginity is when you lose that secrecy, and that can happen a lot prior to intercourse (e.g. through oral sex).

so the formal defn of virginity, and the reason it was created, aren't perfectly aligned anyway.

i think it's nice that some people choose to wait, but i think it's nice that others don't feel the need to either. i like it that we live in a time where we're allowed to choose what to do with our bodies, without society frowning down upon us.
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Old Mar 27, 2009, 10:45 PM
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times of lack of impulse control...mania...have been when i 'lost it' i guess. i wanted to wait..but screwed up
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Old Mar 27, 2009, 10:49 PM
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Originally Posted by deliquesce View Post
yeah -
and if you want to go by why the word was created - then losing your virginity is when you lose that secrecy, and that can happen a lot prior to intercourse (e.g. through oral sex).
My post should of read "untouched by a man" - to be authentic.
but I think the word heterosexual insinuated her being with a man.

the word "virgin" was original created to describe the heterosexual unmarried maiden - a female that kept her garden (the vaginal area) a secret and untouched by a man until her wedding night.

... ones secrecy was known to be lost when bleeding was present after having had sexual intercourse, not oral sex.
... and sexual intercourse was defined as sexual relations between a man & woman.
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Old Mar 27, 2009, 10:50 PM
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From what I understand, you are a virgin if you have not engaged in penile penetration. Many people vary in their terms of virginity, but that's the one that we used to stick with (no pun intended). Oral sex is different to me, and practicing this doesn't mean you aren't a virgin in a certain aspect.
I guess it's all in the way you perceive it, and I perceive actual penetration to be a sign as to whether or not you are a virgin, or going "all the way".
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Old Mar 27, 2009, 10:51 PM
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I agree with this!
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  #12  
Old Mar 27, 2009, 10:54 PM
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Originally Posted by HALLIEBETH87 View Post
times of lack of impulse control...mania...have been when i 'lost it' i guess. i wanted to wait..but screwed up
No - you did not screw up..... you indulged your self with another for pleasure... and it is up to you to be ok with that moment (or not).

  #13  
Old Mar 28, 2009, 12:38 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Rhapsody View Post
My post should of read "untouched by a man" - to be authentic.
but I think the word heterosexual insinuated her being with a man.

the word "virgin" was original created to describe the heterosexual unmarried maiden - a female that kept her garden (the vaginal area) a secret and untouched by a man until her wedding night.

... ones secrecy was known to be lost when bleeding was present after having had sexual intercourse, not oral sex.
... and sexual intercourse was defined as sexual relations between a man & woman.
yeah, i didnt say it wasn't :???:.
  #14  
Old Mar 28, 2009, 05:45 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by HALLIEBETH87 View Post
What exactly determines virginity? Some believe that you can mess around with oral sex and still be a virgin b/c you havent experienced intercourse. while others think anything beyond kissing is sex.

what say you?
I think that you lose your virginity if you have intercouse.
  #15  
Old Apr 02, 2009, 07:52 AM
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Yes, losing virginity means having sexual intercourse, penis into vagina. That means that homosexuals who have not engaged in heterosexual intercourse are still virgins.
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  #16  
Old Apr 18, 2009, 11:31 AM
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Well, I think the definition of "virginity" is whatever you are comfortable with in terms of being intimate. Let me explain... the general definition of virginity is not having had sexual intercourse, but if you feel that oral sex constitutes "losing your virginity," that's not wrong, per se, it's just what you feel comfortable with.

Me, I go with the old-fashioned definition--if tab A enters slot B, it's sex, you're not a virgin. ^.^ Things get complicated with homosexual relationships, and in that case it's more of a "touching genitals" thing.
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