[shelterdog71]

I know I shouldn't complain one bit and I should be very thankful for what I have.... but that still doesn't make it easier to deal with.

I'm a computer nerd and work in IT. I was at my old company for over 10 years and loved it. We were a close little family, I enjoyed my job, it was challenging, I was always learning, and I planned on retiring from there. One day out of the clear blue they came and told us all we were fired and our department was being outsourced to another company. Everyone except ME was being fired though.. Because I was such an excellent, hardworking employee, I was literally handed a job at the new company that was taking over. Little did I know what was in store...

So the time came and I started at the new place. It's a horrible nightmare and I literally cry every morning when my alarm goes off. I have to drive 25 miles one way (in Chicago traffic that is not quick, easy, or pleasant in any way) to get to work. I despise every one of my coworkers.... they are obnoxious and annoying, lazy, unskilled, unmotivated, and some are just plain dumb. I'm doing the work of 4 people at any given time. The amount of stress I have to deal with should be illegal. I had to go see a heart doctor and have an EKG and everything else because of chest pains from stress. I was having terrible panic attacks and was put on Xanax. Last spring I had to go to the emergency room and be treated for an ulcer. In the 20 years of my adult life that I've been working, I've NEVER gotten physically ill from a job.

For 8.5 hours a day I do double and triple the amount of work, picking up the slack for the lazy ones, cleaning up the disasters the dumb ones have created, getting constantly interrupted with questions when I'm trying to eat lunch or go to the bathroom, etc. etc... (I've actually gone in a bathroom stall and sat on the toilet to eat a sandwich!) The work here is different too... it's simple, there is no challenge, and every day I spend doing the same boring monotonous crap for 8 hours. (That's when I'm not fighting and screaming and arguing with someone).

I've complained to my boss a million times but she is as dumb and lazy as the other employees, plus they are friends, so she does nothing about it. I have absolutely NO respect for her, especially after another coworker started a huge fight with me one day, and we were screaming and swearing at each other... it almost got physical... I was so upset I was shaking and foaming at the mouth. Basically he didn't want to do his job out of spite because he didn't want to deal with a person he disliked. He actually said this to me... I told him that was too bad and to do his damn job. After the screaming match I stormed out of the office before I lost control.. it was either going to be me in jail or him in an ambulance... My boss was sitting there listening the whole time and did absolutely nothing about it.

So after 8.5 hours of this kind of BS every day I get to drive another 25 miles (well over an hour) through terrible road-rage traffic to get home. By the time I'm home I'm exhausted, pissed off, and disgusted with the entire world. I do nothing but sit in front of the TV and eventually fall asleep at 9pm. I get up at 4:30am and get home after 5pm. And every day starts the cycle of hell all over again...

What keeps me here are the awesome health benefits, the great salary, and 5 weeks paid vacation. There is no way I could possibly leave that... I have a mortgage to pay! (Alone too, since my fiancee left me 6 months ago...) So I NEED every penny I make just to stay alive and stay in my house. Plus the job market is total crap... Even if DID find another job it would either be a temporary contract position, no benefits, 1/2 the pay to deal with the same BS, the stress of starting over again at a new company, etc. So I'm pretty much stuck here.

Again, I know so many people that are out of work and have been for over a year or more. People would kill to be in my position or have such a terrible "problem". But it just sucks when you wake up every single freakin day having nothing to look forward to, and knowing what the next 8 hours is going to bring. Same BS day after day after day... This isn't living. It's just existing. And it's not very fun. This has been going on for over a year.

Any time I complain about my job to my mom or my best friend, they get upset with me and tell me I should be thankful I'm not on unemployment or losing my house or out on the street (or some other horrible thing). I know that but I don't really care about other people's problems! I'm sorry but I don't... this is MY life and I have to take care of myself. I'm completely miserable at my job and this is turning my personal life into a disaster as well. (it's a part of why my fiancee left me...) I'm tense, irritable, impatient, and disgusted with everyone and everything. I have no friends and no social life, and spend my weekends sulking inside my house, counting down the minutes that I have to go back there on Monday.

I try so hard to not let it bother me and just deal with it and go home at the end of the day. I thought "New Year, New Thinking" but it's not even February 1st yet and I'm ready to blow a gasket.

Thanks for listening.

[Can't Stop Crying]

Yes - I hate my job and I feel guilty for hating it when so many are unemployed!

[impulse]

Hi Shelterdog! I could have written that post myself. : )

Doing a big edit, why repeat such similarity.

First off I hear you completely. Should one feel thankful for a job, where they feel "abused?" No.

To survive well, I do however feel it's important to accept it for what it is. No matter what you do, it's NOT and I repeat NOT going to change.

So why fight or disagree with the status quo? Let them have their cake, they'll eventually choke on it. ; )

You seem like you've got excellent tech and soft or people skills. Strongly suggest you focus on selling those soft skills to a potential employer on your resume. "ACE the IT Resume" is a very good book, that shows one how to sell that element like a marketing professional.

I got lucky on Monday of last week, and finally terminated. Boss accused me of something he wouldn't specify, and erroneously presented perfectly "normal" activity log proof. They've offered severence, etc. which is basically a legal bribe just to forget it and go away.

Well I'm not upset. Actually happy, thinking about my boss and co-worker. Having to do all of that work, that they used to dump on me. More so, that the general manager obviously knows and is afraid they might get sued. Because of my boss's high level of managerial and/or technical incompetance. Makes me kind of giddy just to think about it.

I'm free as a bird with time and income, to find a better fit for me. They're all stuck! : )

[shelterdog71]

You are right... I know I just have to accept it and deal with it because things will NEVER change. A big part of the problem is I am a Type A personality, a very hard worker, and cannot tolerate laziness or slacking. But really, am I asking too much? Is doing your job to the best of your ability really something that people need to be reminded to do? Around here it's 8 hours of social time... except for ME.

My mom says "Why do you work so hard when the rest of them sit around all day doing nothing? They get paid the same as you." And she's right. But I CANNOT just sit here and slack off while the work piles up... it drives me nuts.

I know my boss sees that I work 10x as hard as everyone else and she does appreciate it... last year they even gave me a $500 bonus for doing a great job and nobody else got one.

But throwing a little money at me still doesn't make up for the fact that it's 8 hours of PURE HELL every single day.

[impulse]

Type A? Lots of empathy, in that your greatest strength i.e. prolific worker...is also your greatest health risk. Sounds like you've already started experiencing symptoms of the most common one for your type.

Took many years for me to adjust my own perception of work. I've never been a Type A, but I approach my work in such a way as almost always finding myself to be the "top" performer. The maddening part is I'm so relaxed and easy going, I've been accussed of looking like I do nothing at all. Even though this last job, I resolved 35 percent more technical issues than the next highest up.

As a result of my own approach to work, not doing what others are doing... Yesterday, I had one of the sales people offer to hook me up with one of our competitors for an interview. They're friends with the CIO and his wife. Definately, don't think you should approach your tasks any differently. Sure, others are duffing off...but when push comes to shove and references are asked for. Who do you think will be lighter to lift for that next job?

I'd guess we've both been in IT for many years. The duffers definately have a more difficult time finding new "cheese" when times get tough.

Took me forever to shift my mindset and say hey, I'm doing this for me. Not for whoever employees me. Doesn't matter what others think or do...my work represents me and I'm honoring myself.

Strongly suggest finding an outside pursuit, to help relieve the type of stress A's go through. Just a quick technique that often helps me. We can't change how our brain's work. But we can shift our perceptions. i.e. Instead of thinking thoughts. Simply observe them from a detached perspective as they flow on by. It takes practice, but that simple shift can yield some amazingly calm feelings and results.

[piercepark]

Originally Posted by shelterdog71

I know I shouldn't complain one bit and I should be very thankful for what I have.... but that still doesn't make it easier to deal with.

I'm a computer nerd and work in IT. I was at my old company for over 10 years and loved it. We were a close little family, I enjoyed my job, it was challenging, I was always learning, and I planned on retiring from there. One day out of the clear blue they came and told us all we were fired and our department was being outsourced to another company. Everyone except ME was being fired though.. Because I was such an excellent, hardworking employee, I was literally handed a job at the new company that was taking over. Little did I know what was in store...

So the time came and I started at the new place. It's a horrible nightmare and I literally cry every morning when my alarm goes off. I have to drive 25 miles one way (in Chicago traffic that is not quick, easy, or pleasant in any way) to get to work. I despise every one of my coworkers.... they are obnoxious and annoying, lazy, unskilled, unmotivated, and some are just plain dumb. I'm doing the work of 4 people at any given time. The amount of stress I have to deal with should be illegal. I had to go see a heart doctor and have an EKG and everything else because of chest pains from stress. I was having terrible panic attacks and was put on Xanax. Last spring I had to go to the emergency room and be treated for an ulcer. In the 20 years of my adult life that I've been working, I've NEVER gotten physically ill from a job.

For 8.5 hours a day I do double and triple the amount of work, picking up the slack for the lazy ones, cleaning up the disasters the dumb ones have created, getting constantly interrupted with questions when I'm trying to eat lunch or go to the bathroom, etc. etc... (I've actually gone in a bathroom stall and sat on the toilet to eat a sandwich!) The work here is different too... it's simple, there is no challenge, and every day I spend doing the same boring monotonous crap for 8 hours. (That's when I'm not fighting and screaming and arguing with someone).

I've complained to my boss a million times but she is as dumb and lazy as the other employees, plus they are friends, so she does nothing about it. I have absolutely NO respect for her, especially after another coworker started a huge fight with me one day, and we were screaming and swearing at each other... it almost got physical... I was so upset I was shaking and foaming at the mouth. Basically he didn't want to do his job out of spite because he didn't want to deal with a person he disliked. He actually said this to me... I told him that was too bad and to do his damn job. After the screaming match I stormed out of the office before I lost control.. it was either going to be me in jail or him in an ambulance... My boss was sitting there listening the whole time and did absolutely nothing about it.

So after 8.5 hours of this kind of BS every day I get to drive another 25 miles (well over an hour) through terrible road-rage traffic to get home. By the time I'm home I'm exhausted, pissed off, and disgusted with the entire world. I do nothing but sit in front of the TV and eventually fall asleep at 9pm. I get up at 4:30am and get home after 5pm. And every day starts the cycle of hell all over again...

What keeps me here are the awesome health benefits, the great salary, and 5 weeks paid vacation. There is no way I could possibly leave that... I have a mortgage to pay! (Alone too, since my fiancee left me 6 months ago...) So I NEED every penny I make just to stay alive and stay in my house. Plus the job market is total crap... Even if DID find another job it would either be a temporary contract position, no benefits, 1/2 the pay to deal with the same BS, the stress of starting over again at a new company, etc. So I'm pretty much stuck here.

Again, I know so many people that are out of work and have been for over a year or more. People would kill to be in my position or have such a terrible "problem". But it just sucks when you wake up every single freakin day having nothing to look forward to, and knowing what the next 8 hours is going to bring. Same BS day after day after day... This isn't living. It's just existing. And it's not very fun. This has been going on for over a year.

Any time I complain about my job to my mom or my best friend, they get upset with me and tell me I should be thankful I'm not on unemployment or losing my house or out on the street (or some other horrible thing). I know that but I don't really care about other people's problems! I'm sorry but I don't... this is MY life and I have to take care of myself. I'm completely miserable at my job and this is turning my personal life into a disaster as well. (it's a part of why my fiancee left me...) I'm tense, irritable, impatient, and disgusted with everyone and everything. I have no friends and no social life, and spend my weekends sulking inside my house, counting down the minutes that I have to go back there on Monday.

I try so hard to not let it bother me and just deal with it and go home at the end of the day. I thought "New Year, New Thinking" but it's not even February 1st yet and I'm ready to blow a gasket.

Thanks for listening.

sounds like your in a box that you cant get out of.if you could find a trustworthy roomate,you could lrer your overhead and have someone to talk to. darryl

[ramsey12]

I can totally relate to you. Before I got laid off, I worked for a police department for nine years. I received "Manager of the year" in 2005 and was promoted in 2007. I was known for my strong work ethic and being innovative. But I was not in a union. Although there were some good union workers, there were also alot of LAZY, pompous workers. Several days I'd walk into the office to see the detectives play golf in the office or throw oranges around, etc. Great way to spend taxpayer money! I literally got called into the office one day because when I let them know of a crime series (which was part of my job), the detectives would complain that I was "Too pushy". The LT (who was not even my boss at the time) went on to tell me that the detectives are working tough cases where children are being abused (but he said this in a much cruder way). Uh, I read all the reports and trust me, there were not too many of those types of cases - plus visions of the in-office golfing and throwing oranges around kept running through my head. ANYWAY, when it came time for layoffs, guess who got laid off? ME! It was AWFUL, and I fought like hell to keep my job but the City Council is in bed with the police union so... now a union employee gets to take over my job even thought she has no training or experience to do so. Long story longer, I am in good physical shape however my blood pressure was through the roof because the place was so toxic and hostile. So in some ways, I know I am very lucky to escape - a few other of the "Good Coworkers" tell me they are miserable and are somewhat jealous of my freedom. So my advice to you is still try to get another job while you have a job before you find yourself in my place because, like me, you obviously don't "Fit in there" - Thanks God!

[shelterdog71]

Believe me, I would LOVE to find another job. However I make great money, have great benefits, and get 5 weeks paid vacation. I also have alot of clout and authority here, and my boss loves me. So there's no way I can justify leaving, even if I could find another job! I've been checking my company's internal job posting board hoping that something else opens up in another department.

I had a few words of encouragement the other day... I may soon be able to work from home 2 days a week. That would be a huge help because I wouldn't have to spend all day with these obnoxious morons, and I wouldn't have to deal with the horrible commute. Those alone will lessen my stress and I can't wait. Now to see if it actually happens.....

My blood pressure was so high when I left here on Friday that I almost went to the ER. It's just an awful situation.

[pgrundy]

My spouse is in a similar situation to yours. Works all the time since the '08 layoffs and commutes four hours a day to do it.

Around here (MI) it seems to be feast or famine. Either people can't find work at all or they're working every waking minute. Even a job you like gets oppressive if it's all you ever get to do.

[pgrundy]

P.S. -- It took me over a year to find a part-time minimum wage retail job, and it's surprisingly exhausting. Thing have really taken a dark turn the past few years, at least on the job front.

[ECHOES]

I am glad to be working, but yes I hate my job.
I hate to go to bed at night because the next thing I know, it will be morning and time to go to work. Sunday nights are the worst!

My job has more stress than I can handle, and it doesn't pay well, and the benefits are lousy. I just work to pass it out to the landlord, electric company, etc.

[shelterdog71]

It's so awful. I have nothing to look forward to, EVER. I feel defeated and broken down. I'm screwed and there's nothing I can do about it. The only thing that will help is to win the lottery and that will never happen. I'm stuck here forever... or until the economy picks up and jobs start coming back. So yeah, forever.

OMG I hate my coworkers so much. They are so lazy and stupid and inconsiderate. The person I work closest with is the worst. He calls in sick constantly, comes in late every day, when he is here he does absolutely NOTHING, disappears for 30 minutes at a time, takes 3 lunch breaks and eats like a pig at his desk, etc. etc... I'm the moron that has to pick up the slack and do all his work. Yet he says he "has my back".. yeah right. I could go on and on complaining about these idiots all day but you get the idea.

I'm just hoping I can work from home a couple days a week and avoid these idiots and their disgusting, unprofessional behavior.

[cocoabeans]

I feel the same way about my job! I hate it! I don't want to go back to that hole. I hope for a lay off. My coworkers are idiots, uneducated, out of control, vile creatures and no one works hard. Nothing matters there. I don't care anymore and it isn't a secret. I spend my entire day browsing job sites and surfing the web. No one cares. I'm practically asking to lose my job. It is a joke. I could do work but, when no one else does, my work doesn't matter. I haven't even showered in two weeks.