Badgering on the job

Since the economy tanked, bad bosses and mean employees have taken advantage of the situation by 'acting out' on the job and knowing they can get away with it. No one is getting fired and no one dares quit because it is so hard to get another job. One of the many ways this meanness is inflicted is: badgering an employee who refuses to participate in voluntary activities.

In my opinion, if Employee A has said "no thank you" to the Donate your time/hard-earned money/self-esteem/favorite pair of shoes to the company coffers, then that should be it and nothing more should be said. Instead, the boss smirks and makes a point of double-triple making sure that I really don't want to participate in this supposedly volunteer activity,and when I have said "No thank you" once more tries to engage me in conversation about why the boss felt the need to bring it up once again, blah blah blah.

Then, where possible, the boss gets a co-worker to triple-quadruple check that I am not participating in whatever this voluntary activity is, and this employee tries to engage me in why the employee needed to bring it up again, blah, blah, blah. If this were a victory garden for WWII or a guaranteed bone marrow match for a sick child or something else critical to human life, I'd do it.

But when it is personal interests and trying to force other people to underwrite those personal interests and they call it voluntary, then I have the right to say "No thanks." And I shouldn't have to say it over and over, and I shouldn't ever have to answer to a coworker about it. And I am not talking about United Way. Many places I've worked badger employees about this; I am talking about other very personal choices some people want to do on the job and I am not interested.

In another situation about another topic, my boss smirked and said "I'll probably continue to ask you this over and over because I'll forget" and she said it like a promise/threat, that she would continue to ask me over and over. I've already had one go-round with Human Resources about this very subject and already done what they said: refused because it is voluntary. So the issue is badgering, not the particular object of the request.

This situation sounds unpleasant (I might even call it harassment).

If I did not want to do/give whatever it is, I would say "nope, thanks" and it would not bother me how many times they asked; I'd be doing "Huh? Oh, still nope, thanks" as many times as they wanted.

Are you appearing on edge or like you are listening to them when they flap their mouths about it? That may have them thinking you are thinking about or considering it or likely to give in to their repeated pressure, just to shut them up? Take it as a sign they like you, want you to be part of whatever it is and laugh at them a few times, "Ha, ha! Still 'no' just like the last time!". If you have personal feelings about whatever it is, try not to let that get mixed up in their asking you to give or it will make it feel worse? I'd get a colored file card and keep it on my desk in plain sight and make a mark on it every time they ask :-) say to boss or coworker, "You know, that's the 32nd time you've asked me that question? If you ask me 33 times, you have to give me _______"

I think it is a form of harassment, but one that mean people can get away with as long as they mete it out carefully. "Oh, I forgot" is a much more palatable excuse than "I don't like this person, so I will needle him/her because I know I can get away with that."

hah! Piss them off! Smile so big it will make there head spin and say "no thank you".....kill them pains in the butts with kindness and freaking happiness.....and end it with "seeyah later, its been a pleasure"