What to do?

I haven't really posted much on this site. I am wanting to get a divorce but in order to do so I need a job. Something that is not easy to come by, one our economy and two because I have only worked twice in my life. The marriage I am in, well lets just say I never worked (wont get into why) point is, I don't have the experience and when I have tried to look for a job, it's either lack of experience, no one is hiring or my scars. I have never been one for judging others strictly because of my life and the hell i have endured. I am unhappy and have been for years. I am ready to get out on my own and start my life, something I have never been able to experience much less enjoy.

Hi! You certainly aren't the only woman who wants to leave, but needs a job. Do you have any money of your own you might spend for some training? Perhaps in the meantime you can volunteer in an area you'd like to get some experience in. I hope your husband isn't one of those men who don't let their wives get out.....

No, I don't. I live in the volunteer state and they will not let you volunteer here, have already asked. I won't tell you my response to them...Actually he is, that is why I am having such a hard time. One shelter won't take me because I used to be a cutter, the other won't take me because I have twin babies. I feel so lost and hopeless. I went to court got a separation, that did not do any good because it didn't keep him away and the police couldn't do anything because they could not catch him, ultimately i was forced to let him back because legally I could not keep him out of his own home and I could not be homeless with twin babies. I am going to see another attorney on the 12th to see what I can do.

Good for you for planning to see another lawyer. It sounds like you are on the right track.

There is no way to hide the scars? Long sleeves, etc? I mean how can they not hire you because of scars - you're not going for modelling jobs, right?

No, I am not. people here do not accept people like me. And yes they can refuse to hire you. I can't even take my children to the home school groups anymore because the other moms freak out. As I stated before shelters here won't accept me because of it. When I go for an interview that's what they look at, not who I am as a person. Even at church. The way I see it, if they cannot accept me for who I am then they are not worth working for, much less my time. Unfortunately we live in an ignorant world. And my family is a huge part of them also.

There's scar coverup makeup that you can buy, although I'm not sure what it's called - try googling it. I agree it's not fair that people judge you because of scars, but I know reality is different.

Good luck.

splitimage

Thank you, I will look for it.

It takes a lot of courage to do what you're doing. Don't give up on it. I haven't been married, but I know what it's like to be "stuck" in a serious relationship due to a lack of resources. I don't know what your situation is like, but I know that personally having been in abusive, manipulative, etc. relationships, nothing is more important than getting out! It won't be easy, but it will be worth it. And you deserve to be happy! As far as jobs go, there are a million reasons why people are denied jobs. I have a bachelor's degree, an almost-completed master's, and plenty of experience, and I can't get one either. I've been denied for some because I'm "over-qualified." It may take some time, and you may not start out in your dream job, but you'll find one and start accumulating that experience to get a better one. There's a fabulous book called The Law of Divine Compensation--it's really encouraging and powerful. I highly recommend it. Best of luck to you.