[Dust to Dust]

I have an issue and it's been bothering me for quite some time. As in my previous post, I work at an office and at 2 other jobs. I pay about $875 a month in college loans and trust me I have tried my best to lower those loans for my sake.. but it's not possible. Anyways, my office job pay covers my loans completely whether I work full or part time..if I'm lucky I'll have $100-&200 spare to put into my savings. I then work two other part time jobs..one is at a retail store in my town..where on a good pay check I make about $300-$400...and then I babysit where I make at least $100-$150 a week. A few months ago I got my own banking account because my mother was stealing money from me. I made this account private and secret and worked with the kind people at the bank to make sure all was hidden. I've been able to save almost five grand, which is the most I've ever saved in my entire life.

Anyways, I have a girlfriend who I want to live with. We've been together for about a year and a half. And I know she's my bestfriend and soulmate. We want our lives together. She used to live down the street from me..and we worked at Target together for over a year..that's where we met . She moved over half a year ago and lives in upstate NY. It's been hard being away from her.. and we've both been pushing ourselves to work hard so we could live our lives together. She just landed a new job up there and starts this week. I keep finding myself looking for jobs up by where she lives..and there are jobs up there with good benefits and pay. I want to apply so badly. But we don't have a place yet. And I don't own a car..but I mean I guess it's almost time for me to own my first.

My question to you all basically is.. in what order should I do this all in because eventually it should all be done... Should I get a car first? Then apply to jobs up there? Then wait until my girlfriend has her apartment and then either move up there or visit there for interviews.. It's a 7 hour drive. I just want things to happen. It's hard because I have these dumb college loans to pay every month and they don't ever stop. Rent by where she is is cheap..she said she could pay it by herself easily so I can worry about my loans. This is all just about me trying to land a job up there..part of me feels like I'm wasting time siting here..but I think she wants me to be patient and to wait a little. I think I've just been getting anxious thinking..what if I can't find anything up there by the time I apply. Maybe I'm jumping the gun because we miss each other so much and I just don't want us to be apart anymore? How do you make "The Transition"? From one place to another? To one job to the next? All while still paying college loans. Could I apply and still have a chance if I got a call back...knowing I live currently in NJ and the job obviously is in upstate NY? What do I tell the company?

[jadzea]

If your intention is to move up with her regardless of whether you have a job or not, get yourself a good used car and move there once she has a place you can live. If you are only going to move if you have a place to work, find the job first. I know it is easier to find a job if you live in the area but you do not know how long it will take you to find something. Your savings will dwindle fast if you have no income. Good Luck. I live in Upstate NY and absolutely love it. I'm sure you will too.

[anna_goth27]

Honestly, I would suggest securing the job first once your gf has a place already. You don't want to put too much strain on your already difficult finances by moving up there before knowing you will have money coming in. Make provisions to visit her often in the meantime, if possible, during times when you could go interview for jobs. I know these days most companies would rather employ someone who is a local, but once you let them know your reason for applying is because you wish to relocate, I don't see it hurting your chances any that you live in NJ at the moment.

That's just my opinion.

[hvert]

I think it really depends on where in upstate NY you are talking about. In a city or town, you may be able to get away with not having a car or a job lined up. If she is in a very rural area, you may want to have both a car and a job lined up before moving.