[Citrine]

Today and for the last few weeks Im getting to the point where I loathe my workplace. Everything. The work, the people, the building, talk, the jokes, the predictability. Same beep different day. Same conversations, same faces. We dont have our own workload each if we did Id be in a room by myself getting on with it. I have zero tolerance for it all. I am low yes but is it making me see the truth? I think so. Its a soul less unsatisfying job.The conversations and falseness just wind me up.

I dont want to move onto anything in particular, just need to take a few months off to allow some kind of recovery from my down period. I cant. On top of it my hours are unpredictable and while I take home enough to get by and save a little there are months when I dont and so its an unstable and unrewarding situation anyway.

I sat on the bus on the way home thinking about the yatter that had gone on today and its so superficial and boring. Calories are always a hot topic...yawwwnnnn. I must blend in to some degree and so I find myself turning into them a little then hate myself for it. Im lucky to have a job in this time, alot dont but Im in the wrong place in work and in the wrong place in my mind to deal with it.

Will this `suppression' and carrying on make my depression worse? I think it does right? I get broken sleep each night before work and its not great at other times either. Ummm fed up!

[kaliope]

I believe your unhappiness at work will make your depression worse. being miserable all day long will only emphasize your unhappiness. having nothing to look forward to each day as well. if there was only something positive you could find about the work place this would help. I reached a point where I dreaded work for a while and I focused on my paycheck and that helped get me through. it went on for about three months before I finally started enjoying my job again because I like what I do and enjoy the people that I work with. I hope you can find something positive to make this more tolerable. if not, start looking for a different job that will make you happier. take care.

Been there a few times in the last few years. Yes it has really dragged me down to a bad place. Also have to work. I finally had to come up with a plan to get out. My current job is hopefully just for a few years and hopefully my plan will work. Looking would help. If that drags on thinking about learning a different skill or voluteering. School would be good but anything to move forward will help. Something to keep your head out of the mundane.

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[wildflower120]

I don't have any good advice to offer, but I know exactly how you feel. I hate my job, and know it's making my depression worse. My job is pretty easy, its the people I work with. I have never worked with such petty and back stabbing people. As much as I need my job, I just wish they would fire me. I just keep applying for jobs hoping and praying something will come through.

[Citrine]

Thank you for your support guys. I am trying as hard as I can to get a new job. Good luck to anyone in the same situation.