[H3rmit]

A couple of business articles about personality/behaviour and career success:

1/ 7 Stupid Ways Smart People Sabotage Their Success

Stupidest Things Smart People Do - Business Insider

1. Yes, I do this because I don't know what else to do. When I overcome this and "just do something" I tend to have regrets. I keep going even though I hate it, and I spend my life engaged in something miserable.

2. I tried so hard to do this. It made me miserable. I have to fake it all the time. I was urged to fit in. Maybe I should n't have tried to.

3. I am at this stage now. It is hard to find any motivation at all.

4. No. I *struggle* with social skills and fail. See #2.

Second article: 14 habits of exceptionally likeable people:

Habits Of Exceptionally Likable People - Business Insider

1. Positive? What on earth is there to be positive about??? I am not a pollyanna. I'm a realist.

2. Yes, I strive to do this, but under stress I sometimes crack.

3. I try. I keep trying to improve.

4. I wish I could, but after a life of failure and social confusion, I cry easily. I don't know how to function socially, so how can I maintain composure? An unresponsive wall only scares people. Been there, done that. A key piece is missing (the social piece) and after trying for decades, I cannot overcome that. I believe I'm on the autism spectrum. Too old to be diagnosed, though, and my history of "success" with people argues against such a diagnosis.

5. I've been called too patient, but I can be short-tempered too. I get frustrated after a while.

etc etc

I try with many of these, but lack of social knowledge, intuition, awareness screws up many of them.

Life is not worth it, given my inadequacy. I would like to be able to support myself again and not just hope we'll be okay on my husband's salary. That is not really fair to him in the long run, and I am dissatisfied wtih it.

[atomicc]

Thanks for this! Very interesting

[Strive4health]

Some of this seems like fake behavior and cliqueishness. "Smiling all the time"?? What? What if you need to be serious? How does one smile all the time and retain their composure in a serious setting????

[StrongerMan]

This sounds like a hit piece on people who are smart and make less smart, more social people feel inadequate. Smart does not equal anti-social, cripplingly shy or a know-it-all narcissist any more than less intelligent equates to well adjusted, empathetic social butterflies. We certainly wouldn't expect the Jeff Spicoli types to be very successful in the professional or business world either. But then they aren't meant for that environment anyway. All things in moderation; and so it goes with personalities and types of intelligence. Who said "smart" people necessarily learned everything from a book? Let's turn this article around and see how it sounds...

7 Stupid Ways Dumb People Sabotage Their Success

1. They spend too much time doing (reacting) and not enough time thinking (preparing and being proactive). The early bird often doesn't get the worm.

2. They follow the pack too. There is no monopoly on wanting to fit in or going where the money or other reward is.

3. They stop trying. Yes, dumb people are lazy too. They are humans who often seek the easiest path.

4. They undervalue critical thinking skills... preparation, listening. Measure twice, cut once.

5. They place being right above all else. Yes, dumb people can be know-it-all's too.

6. They equate education with being an elitist snob. Again, here, a balance of book knowledge and street smarts is ideal. After all, books are usually written by those who lived what they are writing about and wish to teach others what worked (or not) in the past. Learning from others mistakes can often be less costly than learning from one's own.

7. They are too dependent on others. Group-think can often end up in consensus.. the wrong consensus. And a healthy support system, or lack thereof, isn't confined to any type of person.

To me, this writer, and accompanying study, is being awfully lazy. Falling victim to the attractiveness of the easiest target... the stereotype. Who's to say intelligent people necessarily "undermine" themselves with their "strange" ways? Some person who assumes they know what's best? Sounds elitist to me....

[Strive4health]

A lot of the "advice" out there doesn't appear to give people the boost they need to succeed. It makes them second guess themselves all the time.