[8thstreetbungalow]

Ok so before i was medicated or even diagnosed i expierenced this. So alot of the issues is probably because of my illness. But I have always wanted to have a discussion on this matter just to kinda get some things off my chest and be prepared if this sort of thing every happens again.

I did catering, I was a waiter but we were short staffed so I helped with everything and everyone. It was at a professional club taht did weddings and such sometimes we would have parties of 400 people we had to serve with only 6 people working including chefs and management.

Management would constantly yell at us and often insult their employees. Everyone was stressed out all the time. Even with all this, we stil managed to get the job done and we did a pretty good job too. When we finished working everyone usually cheered up and had fun conversing.

None of this is the problem, just describing the work enviroment.

The problem is my duty manager i came in contact with. I would talk to her often and share personal problems with her because she always seemed so nice and friendly. No matter what i said to her, she always had a supportive and impressive comment to provide that made me trust her. Upper management was happy with my effort in the job and liked my performance and ability to improve. They were putting my name in for an award. People use to approach me on the job and shake my hand and tell me that they liked my hard work.

I had no support system. Well things were going good ya know i was really happy, i was exercising regularly. Then things started to get wierd. At first I simply couldn't pinpoint what was wrong, things just were out of place. We had a resturant attached to our club, after work i would just sit and wait for my ride and order a soda. I slowly started to pick up on the fact that the employees there were looking at me differently. People would often approach me and ask "is everything ok". Another common phrase was "hows it going boss". The boss comment wasn't a big deal and i shook it off. But having total strangers ask me if im ok when all im doing is drinking soda was odd.

As i continued to work the attitude from people in general who were working here or customers started to escalade and slowly get worse. I started getting dirty and wierd lookks from strangers i never met. One day i went to my job on a day i wasn't working and upper management approached me in a panicked voice telling me i wasn't allowed to be here on a day im not working.

Now things get even more interesting, the people who aren't my managers but work around them started telling me how i wasn't being treated fairly and that i should speak my mind and what not and said "they can't tell you your not allowed back here come back anyway".

When i setup parties, upper management would come in and move things out of place. My duty manager changed her style of management now. At the start of the day she would approach me and verbally tell me a long list of duties to do by the end of the day and never talk to me again. This wasn't a problem i remembered the bulk of what i had to do, I didn't do EXACTLY what she wanted, but i got the job done. Sooner or later, other employees started stalking my actions and complaining to management. My duty manager was now telling all the employees a huge long list of duties verbally without reminding people.

Pretty soon upper management started to let the duty manager do nothing but observe while us "3" waiters had to serve parties of 400+. Simply because that was her job description. This obviously sent complaints up management. But everytime someone approached said manager she would get highly emotional in bursts and always seem to get out of any troubles. Then i started to catch on to stuff, i had this person added on social networks and everything. People started to talk about stuff related to me that the only person i told was this manager (because i trusted her). I would complain about other employees to her and the next day that employee hated me. So i did something very stupid. I sent her a long list of complaints about work in an email accusing upper management of quite a few things. This manager without talking to me, sent said letter to upper-management just as expected. Eventually an investigation would happen and yet again... Nothing happens to anyone. Except this time my job is in jeapardy. So, I did some research and came across the idea that this person might have anti-social personality disorder. So when this person came up to me with rumors about other people that would make them look and sound bad. I would (when shes not around) go to said person and politely ask if they did or said such thing. I found out that these people often didn't.

Another thing, a common rumor this person would spread about me was that i was using people for personal gain. Stress got so bad i would scream and yell at home. So i told my parents about it, they decided to meet this manager because she lived in my neighborhood and talk to her about it. Next thing i know my parents started to treat me the same as everyone else. Like i was some worthless manipulator who uses people. Parents stopped driving me to work, i had to start walking.

Now that my overall attitude reputation and everything was shot, my stress levels way high up. My entire workforce except like one person swiftly changed attitudes towards me. Friends instantly became enemies with like no transistion. Grown adults i never met before started treating me like dirt. One of the bartenders from the resturant asked me if it was true i sent a letter up management. (i never told her) I said yes and this person never talked to me again.

This manager, pretty much targeted people in the workplace and made them highly stressed or like her very much. Whether or not it was for personal gain i'm not sure. Because i remember some employees walk in one day when this manager wasn't around and say stuff like "wow i can't stand this person" then after a conversation they instantly change their whole perspective and now they think shes the best person in the world.

I have told counselors and psychiatrists about this in the past and i usually get hte same response. They say whether or not i'm right about the issue isn't important and that taking care of my own health is all that matters. Well this exiperence led to a psychotic episode and every job i had since everytime i notice "hints" or "signs" of similair behavior i start getting lots of anxiety, one time i had an anxiety attack another time i relapsed into another psychotic episode.

[Altered Moment]

I find it amazing that stress could cause a psychotic episode. Maybe stress triggered a pre existing thing that didn't show up yet or something. Whatever your diagnosis is now maybe hadn't manifested until then.

Work place environments can be the worse gossip mills. And your duty managers sole purpose may have been to always make her self look as good as possible to upper and advance if she could at others expense.

Everyone looking at you differently it seems would only be if you changed in some way other than the people at work who may have all been back stabbing you. Was it your perception of things changed maybe. I dunno.

[8thstreetbungalow]

zinco that is a common theory to what had happened.

Another theory is my lack of emotional support / communication skills / respect for my own and other peoples boundaries created all the dysfunction entirely.