[Katie Banks]

I head one of our department's teams. This coming May we are going to have a team building in some posh resort. Three days and three nights. All expenses paid by our company, of course. I've been given free hand to do whatever I think is best for my team. I've been planning our schedule, trying to come up with good games and activities, etc.

Any recommendations, tips and advice on how I can give my team the best stress-free, fun and memorable team building of their lives? I'm also open to all suggestions when it comes to the games and activities? What do you think are good prizes and giveaways?

[Cris80pitt]

Take them all in sauna and also into a massage salon.

[notz]

What's your budget?

[guilloche]

Oh, wow. I've got so much to say about this Katie, but I'm a little afraid I'll overwhelm you, or sound really awfully negative. But first, May is not that far away! When do you need to have the plans done? Are you even going to have enough time to get this planned by then?

So... there are a lot of people who do not enjoy team building exercises. Especially those off-site, for multiple days (even if it's held at an all-expense posh resort). Hopefully, you're already aware of this, but I have to mention it. Remember, this isn't a vacation for most people. It's work, taking over your life for several days. Some people have hobbies (or classes, or therapy appointments!) that they'll need to cancel or reschedule to go to this. Some people have kids, pets, spouses, or aging parents that they'll need to find care for (possibly paid care) to go to this. Some people are grumpy introverts (*me raising my hand*) that require lots of alone time to function well, who will absolutely freak out at the thought of 72 hours of togetherness with colleagues that they honestly don't like that much.

And, since we're on a psychology site, remember, there's kind of a huge number of people who have experienced trauma... so anything requiring physical closeness (it sounds funny, but hugging, touching, being blindfolded and led through the woods by someone you barely know while holding their hand) can be potentially triggering and frankly icky. Rule #1, for me, would be to be cautious choosing activities, so that everyone can maintain a sense of dignity and personal space.

It's not just physical closeness. Some people have extreme fears or outright phobias that do not affect their work at all, and that there's no reason for co-workers to be involved with. Team building exercises aren't really the place to work out a deep seated fear of heights (on a ropes course) for example, unless somebody really is just aching to do that with their co-workers.

And, not all of us are blessed with the same abilities. I am not in any way athletic (granted, unfortunately). I have tried, but I just... I don't know, maybe I lack the "balance" gene or something. So picking an activity that is more physical could very likely result in injuries (heck, I'm still recovering from a serious sprained ankle from taking out my trash *sigh*). I also burn easily and am supposed to avoid sun exposure (yup), and for some people (on certain medications) this is even more important. But, people aren't going to want to (and shouldn't have to) divulge all their medical or psychological issues to you, or to their bosses, to explain why they're uncomfortable with team-building activities... so again, it's a bit of a bad place to be in.

And... (sorry to go on!) Here's an example of something else! A manager at my company, about 3 levels above me, decided to organize a team-building event for everyone under him. He chose... a tour of a local brewery. Cool, isn't it? Except for two things... I don't drink, and it wasn't covered by the company (we had to pay). Thankfully, it was optional (I didn't go).

So, there are lots of issues... a multi-edged sword if you will...
- a lot of people don't want to be there
- some might want to be there, but have physical/psychological issues that make participating dangerous or uncomfortable
- BUT they may feel like it's mandatory for their job (or it may actually be mandatory), so they can't openly admit they don't want to be there (but they can be gossip, whine, and complain mercilessly to their best work friends when nobody else is around)
- the management who set this up is likely to see it as a "treat", or like a gift/vacation. So it can be hurtful/confusing to hear some of the negative things that will come back from it

Anyway... some links you might want to check out.

- Anything on Ask a Manager is *excellent*. The comments are usually pretty good too, though there's always a lot. Here are a couple entries that might be useful:

--- can we make staff retreats more useful? ? Ask a Manager
This one talks about how to make a discussion-based company retreat useful (not a team-building retreat with games, but a discussion-based retreat to fulfill a goal). Might be helpful?

--- my company requires employees to take an annual "team-building" trip to the Caribbean ? Ask a Manager
- This is someone writing because their company *requires* everyone to go on a team building cruise to the Caribbean each year (but pay for their own food.) The cost of the food is an issue, but if you look through the comments, you'll also see (I think) that again, there's a general dislike for multi-day trips with co-workers. Not everyone, of course, but this is a cruise to the Caribbean. On its face, a pretty fabulous thing! But, still, a lot of people aren't comfortable or excited by something like this.

--- let's have a remote staff retreat to publicly review everyone's strengths and weaknesses ? Ask a Manager
Here's another "don't". Don't ask employees to give each other negative, public feedback. It goes back to respecting people, and not putting them in uncomfortable situations. Negative feedback should be private. Another article mentioned the same thing, and said that, it was possible that the retreat included positive feedback as well - but it was hard to remember that - after watching several people burst into tears!

--- How to Team-Build - Without Trust Falls or Lengthy Off-Sites | The Fast Track
Same author, but an article she wrote for another site - how to team build without trust falls or length off-sites, probably worth checking out. (She links to this on her site, and people commented there, you can check that out here: how to team-build -- without trust falls, rope courses, or lengthy off-sites ? Ask a Manager )

--- my office is forcing us to do karaoke for "fun" ? Ask a Manager
Maybe slightly off-topic, but again, just to drive home the point that something that can be fun for some people - can be a nightmare for others (and something that can be fun to do with your friends can be a nightmare to do with your co-workers) - this is about a forced karaoke competition in the name of teambuilding/celebration.

My favorite quote: "And please, organizers of workplace fun: Making fun mandatory undercuts the whole point. Stop that." OMG - yes yes yes. (Ha... actually I need to share that with my therapist, who keeps giving me "homework" to have fun!)

A few other links of interest:

---The 10 Most Horrifying Team Building Exercises | The Fast Track - 10 Most Horrifying Team Building Exercises

--- https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/20141...es-of-all-time - From LinkedIn - the 4 Worst Team-Building and Leadership Activities of All Time

--- 3 Bad Team-Building Exercises For Businesses - Forbes - From Forbes, 3 Bad Team Building Exercises

If you google "team building sucks" you'll probably get loads of great examples of what to avoid.

I will say that I had one really awesome "team building" trip. My organization decided to reward us with a trip to a local amusement park. (My boss was instrumental in making that happen, he was honestly the best boss *ever*.)

It was voluntary. It was fully paid for. We got there, met up under a pavilion expecting some sort of meeting... and the higher up boss basically said, "I'm required to have a meeting for the company to pay for this, so here's the meeting. Lunch is on the tables, enjoy, and have fun!" That was IT. Then we all found people we liked to wander around and enjoy the park with. I'm not an amusement park type of person, but I had a blast and really enjoyed it.

Not sure that helps any, and I'm sorry for all the negativity. Hopefully it can save you some heartache later on. I wish I had more ideas on how to actually make it fun and useful for people, rather than horror stories!

Good luck!

[wetremember]

Determine what your team wants to work on and improve, from there when coming up with a game or activity, relate it with the struggles your employees are experiencing in their daily routines. Make sure that the exercises are not too physically demanding. Ensure that everyone can participate, learn and have fun.

[ManOfConstantSorrow]

I took my team to the Scottish Highlands and an outdoor pursuits centre. First we identified the sneaks who dob us in the senior management and gave them a head start of 90 minutes in pouring rain and sleet (it is Scotland after all) and then we set out after them howling like wolves. How good it felt to throw them into the nearest loch (this was in September so it was not as cold as it could be). They were good sports, most of them anyway, about it and the air being cleared we had a really good week devoted mainly to exploring the malt whisky industry.

[lizardlady]

Katie, I had to spend yesterday at a mandatory "employee appreciation day" picnic. We had to bring food to share! If you are trying to show us appreciation buy all the stinkin' food! Better yet, if you want to show me appreciation give me the day off with pay!

I'm one of those folks who hates enforced "fun." I agree with everything guilloche said.The idea of having to spend 3 entire days with my co-workers would make me want to slit my own throat. They are okay to work with, but I don't want to live with them for three days!

After being so negative I do have a suggestion. Why not ask your employees for suggestions what they would like to do? If they ask for it they might buy into it more.

I also want to suggest that unless you're having everyone bring their own food or you're going to be at a place with an extensive buffet for every meal, you need to make sure no one has food allergies or dietary restrictions. And if someone does, let the place know so they can make accommodations. I'm someone with food allergies and there's nothing worse than having to worry about if I'm going to be able to get enough to eat or if I'm going to be excluded from an activity involving food because there's no alternative for me to eat. It's not something you think about unless you or a loved one has allergies/dietary restrictions, but it's definitely something to consider.

[hvert]

I think the best giveaway would be to make it truly optional and to pay people for their time. I'm another one who really dislikes being forced to use my personal time to have 'fun' with coworkers. I'll do the occasionally happy hour, but I would not attend a three day weekend at a resort, even if it was mandatory.

I wonder if it would be possible to have two tracks, one that was an optional resort and one that covered the same material during normal working hours?

[wetremember]

Wow you had it all planned, good job! Good luck and all the best