Uncertain of capability, desire, and need to work

Hi, I'm uncertain of three things. 1) Am I mentally and emotionally able to work?2) Do I want to work? 3) Whether I want to or not, is it necessary for my mental health, because I am unable to handle an existence supported on my own entertainment activities, which give me little pleasure anyways?

First, I want to say that my parents support me fully at 24 right now. I don't do a lot. I spent time in a psych ward in late September, 2 weeks, and now I'm on meds, Risperidone and Lithium. I may be schizoaffective, nobody is certain about diagnoses. I was working at a piano repair store before, training to become a piano technician. They may allow me to come back to be trained as a tuner in January, but I can't count on it.

My self esteem would probably be better if I could manage a working schedule. But I am told I am in convalescence. It seems frightening to look for a job even though it is my ticket to independence. I hope writing here can help me to process about it, but if anyone has any thoughts or wants to share a similar situation, they can. Also, I am a classical piano player and I have had lots of interests and hobbies, like learning spanish. I wish I could go to college and study what I love, but I'm not one of those lucky ones, it feels like.

Hello hammerklavier: At 24, you have a lot of years ahead of you (presumably.) Your parents may be supporting you now. But this is unlikely to be the case for whatever amount of time you may have left on this earth. Plus, in our society, a lot of people's self-worth derives from work. So I think for both of those reasons trying to work, if you can, is important.

If it turns out you can't work... then you can't & at some point you'll probably have to see if you can qualify for SSDI. But that's not at all a sure thing either under any circumstances. My suggestion would be to either start out by doing some volunteer work on a regular basis or perhaps get a part-time job. Then at some point perhaps try making the jump to full time. Better to start small & work up than to try to go full-bore all at once & risk having the whole thing unravel.

Learning piano repair & tuning sounds great! I'm not familiar enough with the profession to know to what extent one can earn a living wage doing that. But it sounds as though it would be something that would be in line with some of your interests & that's important. Perhaps later on even college could be a possibility. All things in good time, as the saying goes. Many years ago, I had an opportunity to attend the Boston School of Music. I was talked out of it by my parents & teachers. It might or might have worked out for me. But I always hated what I did do instead. Don't listen to the naysayers...

Hi Hammerklavier,
I'm in awe! Classical piano! WOW that's the coolest. Best wishes to you. It sounds like you are going to get it all figured out. Skeezyks gave some great advice! You are so young, and have lots of room to learn and grow from life's up's and down's.
A class or two at the local community college might do you some good.Maybe you are one of the lucky ones!
Sans

Thanks for you kind responses. Thanks skeezyks. I have to say it is frightening in this unmotivated and depressive state, the thought of doing anything right now. There is a job with christmas trees that I am maybe going to do this year, but even that frightens me.

That's cool that you could've attend Boston school of music. Did you play an instrument?