[orangyred]

At the beginning of April we got a new higher up person. She wasn't my boss and still isn't, but she thought my position should be under her. The department I'm in has been great in supporting me to stay with them.

However, this new person has been manipulative and getting her way. Since I didn't move under her, she created a new position that almost mirrors my job. There is one piece she couldn't get, but she's managing to get to it by withholding a key piece that I need to finish my job. She does give it...eventually. On her terms, basically.

I've been doing this particular job for 15 years and I've never had anything this bad. And I've dealt with some manipulative people.

My boss and the boss over her have tried super hard to make the President see what has happened (not only with this, but with other chaos this woman has created since starting...everything has to be her way) and he is not listening.

Although, I have support from my immediate boss and co-workers (which is great!), I'm at my wits end as to what to do. We are all so tired, honestly, with all the fighting we've had to do with this woman.

Any ideas on how to keep my head up? I get so angry so quickly with her. Just seeing her name pop up and I'm at instant anger.

Things I have been doing:

• Exercise - I run three times a week and walk two other days.
• Sleep - as best as I can. I'm not sleeping well despite going to bed at a decent time. I wake up fretting about work.
• Deep Breathes - have never worked for me. Sometimes drinking water when I'm angry helps.
• Hot Baths

However, this issue is really more psychological and those things are physical. I do not know how to let this go emotionally. I'm doing the best I can with the circumstances I've been given, but I'm still really struggling. I don't want to quit my job. I've been at this place over 16 years all total now. There are great people.

So...again...any ideas?

[Turtle_Rider]

Have you report to your HR yet? Since your bosses support you, it should be easier to report her.

And I believe manipulative person is not smart. There must be some proofs of her chaos and her involvement, especially if it makes bad impact to the business. Document and list them all before you report to the president. With data persist, it'll be easier to convince your President.

[Shazerac]

Ah the sh**ty co-worker.

The only thing I can tell you is avoid her as much as possible and don't bother fighting with her unless she attacks your job directly. Review your job description and make sure it's up to date. If there is a direct report tree make sure you are clear on this and ask that it be updated if it's not clear who you report too. Save all emails, memos or anything written.

If she really is this chaotic and trouble making, she will eventually hang herself without your help.

Try to continue doing the things you can do that relax you. You have been there for 15 years as you said. You will probably outlast her.

[reb569]

Look at some mindfulness techniques that you can practice at work. There are breathing exercises and all kinds of techniques to bring you back to the now that can help calm you down.

I'm glad that you are not facing this on your own. Hopefully, the company President will see what is happening and take action.

Hang in there!

[pegasus]

That sort of person who manipulates usually get found out in the end. Although it may take some time as a Manager needs good hard evidence before they can discipline/fire someone. Document everything but at the same time keep doing your job to the best of your ability and know that you will not stoop to their level of underhanded shenanigans. Be the person you are and not the person she is trying to make you out to be.

[orangyred]

thanks, all!

Read these articles. They have a lot of great advice. Hope they help.

https://www.workitdaily.com/deal-horrible-co-worker/

https://twocents.lifehacker.com/how-...ker-1787682219

https://www.payscale.com/career-news...tive-co-worker

BBC - Capital - Is your colleague pure evil?

https://www.fastcompany.com/3034923/...ur-sanity-in-c