Big Life Changes

I'm having some big life changes recently. About 2-3 months ago, I found out I was pregnant. My husband (28M) and I (28F) were so surprised and excited, but unfortunately I miscarried. I then needed surgery to help with completion of the miscarriage. Overall this experience was traumatizing and plunged me into depression. In the meantime (end of June, early July) my husband started a new job. We are very close and spend a lot of time together - this job requires travel every week at least a night or two. He loves the job and I encouraged him to move forward with it, but the travel has been hard on both of us. I started drinking one weekend and no call/no showed to work one day so I got fired. Now I'm working 2.5 days per week while I figure out what to do but I genuinely don't think I will be able to go back to work full-time and I'm trying to deal with this embarrassment/shame because I grew up learning the value of hard work. I just worry that I'm never going to find the balance with this illness. I'm afraid I'm going to start getting a "bad reputation" in my professional circle. I worked my tail off through undergrad and grad school to get this degree and now I don't even think I have the mental wellness/ability to hold down a job in this profession.