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Desoxyn
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Default Sep 13, 2023 at 08:16 PM
  #521
I have a rare opinion about addiction.

Short, I was an impulsive reck. And I've built my life, trying to get away from that place..

Psilocybin is definitely preferred to be done with a professional therapist.. But it happened. I advise strong caution (The most severe of cautions), as a bad trip can happen. And it did.

Many years later, I didn't focus on the drugs.. I explored, and gained/retained responsibility... Awareness.. Many things.. Spirituality etc..

I would like to make some type of career - Such as neuroscience, psychology, pharmacology (Neuropsychopharmacology) - But that is just a type of dream.

I'd like to heal my own trauma... And then help others, with their trauma..

Trauma is the cause. Most people have trauma, in this life.. Some have it so bad - So it is, that the harder the heroin is slammed, into the veins...
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Default Sep 23, 2023 at 10:58 AM
  #522
I graduated from IOP this week. Now I'm just on the ACT co-occurring disorders treatment team (which is the basics for me so yay! )

I became really close to someone I met in residential and he let me stay at his place for a few nights to get away from my house/neighborhood (lots of drug/alcohol use), but I have to be home Monday to see my case manager whom I will be discussing alternative living options with.

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Default Sep 23, 2023 at 05:21 PM
  #523
"Is it me or the booze that really gets wasted?"

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Default Sep 25, 2023 at 05:54 PM
  #524
Well, ****, I knew coming back home would be a bad idea.

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Default Oct 05, 2023 at 01:24 PM
  #525
this isn't fun anymore. Now I just feel like a slave to the chemicals.

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Default Nov 07, 2023 at 06:52 AM
  #526
I am beginning to contemplate making a self-referral to the local addictions center.
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Default Nov 07, 2023 at 09:45 AM
  #527
Daily Check In #4

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Default Nov 08, 2023 at 06:21 AM
  #528
I had a drunk dream lat night for the first time in ages. It was very realistic and disturbing.

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"I danced in the morning when the world was begun. I danced in the moon and the stars and the sun". From my favourite hymn.

"If you see the wonder in a fairy tale, you can take the future even if you fail." Abba

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Default Nov 23, 2023 at 02:30 PM
  #529
Tomorrow's 50 days sober

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Desoxyn
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Default Feb 07, 2024 at 10:32 PM
  #530
Simply not taking any drug that effects my heart (Mostly serotonergics are the problem - Such as psilocybin, LSD and DMT - GHB also makes heart beat weird, so no more of those).

The meds I've tried that give me heart palps are also serotonergic (Such as Zoloft, Prozac, Lexapro, Seroquel and Remeron).

Also "Tianeptine" - I threw that away.

I've been doing good - Need Hydromorph-CONTINs.. Idk.. Last summer I snorted the 10x 8mg Dilaudids, and left it as that for 6+ months.

I drank alcohol ~15 times in over a year (In all of 2022, I drank 1-2 double shots once per afternoon), and weed.

I smoked weed recently, and it made me really paranoid. I'm giving the weed (That my moms friend gave to me as a gift), as a gift to someone else.
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Desoxyn
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Desoxyn We are one mind
 
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Default Feb 26, 2024 at 06:59 PM
  #531
When I feel bad, I reach for the ketamine.

I wish to stop doing all of these things.

I need support or I won't be able to do the things I want.

I've decided to quit now. At least I plan to stop before I turn 30.
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