[Typo]

I've been meaning to post here for awhile, I just get so confused everytime I try and start, I feel guilty because I feel I am taking time away from others, or there is that part in me that doesn't want to admit it.

I don't know what to say and I don't know what to do.
I'm so confused about it all.
I abuse alcohol, and it really scares me. I've abused it on and off ever since I was fourteen. It's gotten worse here latley,For almost a month I couldn't start my day without a drink in the morning. I've been clean for the past few days but I'm still scared I'm always teetering back in forth between safe and a mess.
I'm really confused and scared, I don't understand why I do this.
I'm just looking for some advice and support, this is so scary.

[bmoz]

You are worth time. I think that your having acknowledged your issue your confusion will diminish. Use support here. Check out www.rational.org if that doesn't speak to you there is AA. Let us know how you are doing.

[splitimage]

Facing any addiction is hard and scary & the first few days of being sober are the worst. but you've reached out for help here, which is a good start. Sobriety is hard, but it is possible. It's the best thing I've ever done for myself.

I go to AA and have found them to be incredibly helpful and supportive.

You might also want to talk to your dr. about exploring a treatment centre. I've done both inpatient rehab and an outpatient day program. I liked the outpatient day program better because it was more medically based and wasn't just a 12 step program.

We also have a recovery chat here Tuesday nights at 10pm EST that you're welcome to join.

Welcome to the club and good luck on your journey.

--splitimage