Need advice from ASPDs

I need to get an ASPD out of my life in whatever manner has the fewest repercussions. What might work?

Firstly, "antisocial personality disorder" is a wastebasket term that groups a wide range of mentalities under one umbrella. Anyone from the cliché "John Bender" bad boy of high school lore, the abused kid who expresses his repressed anger by taking it out on "the system", to your garden variety psychopath can be slapped with this label. Secondly, even typical psychopaths are unique individuals with different likes, dislikes, modus operandi, mindsets, levels of intelligence, etcetera. That being said, there's no cookie-cutter "misfit-be-gone" method. If you want to get rid of someone, you have to tailor your efforts to fit their specific needs, wants, and/or fears. The easiest way that has the fewest repercussions is to move to a faraway land and assume a new identity. And I suggest you learn to pack light, because there's a good chance you'll run into another one.

do you think that once you have been involved with an ASPD person - for me it was a sociopath/psychopath - that there is a little becaon above your head that tells other ASPD that you may be what they are looking for ...hmmmm dont know if that made any sense at all - but then i hardly ever do be interested in anyones opinion though

thanks

No, it's always been there. And I know what you're talking about. There are two small minorities of people on either side of the empathy spectrum. One group is the psychopaths, the other is the empathic folk. They go together like neodymium magnets.

... Although, I do know two psychopaths who are dating each other. They seem to be the exception that makes the rule true.

soooo if i became less empathic, that would turn the beacon off?

Maybe. Although, I'm not sure how you'd go about it, as I'm pretty sure the degree of empathy of which one is capable is determined by brain structures.

Just in case anyone ever wonders what happened re: the situation that started this thread...

The ASPD in question also has a good dose of narcissistic personality disorder. Instead of patiently listening to him talk about his own opinions, I just started making every conversation about me. I dominated. Now, he barely ever talks to me, the conversations are MUCH shorter and all the drama has gone away.

Well done.

Thanks, Michael! Sometimes I wonder if it's possible to simultaneously be the empath (attracting the ASPD) and the ASPD (winning the game). Hmmm...

Go no contact. Cut off any supply you might be giving him/her. If there is violence get a restraining order.. They mean nothing..could actually fuel a fire. However they will lose interest eventually or if there are consequences to their actions that are more of a burden then hurting/playing with you.
Remember the relationship YOU see is NOT the reality. Emotions are a key component. Give none. It's a very difficult and painful thing to do. Sadly I realized this far to late..
Disappear... But remember if you've been played well you must realize that going nc is a 2 way street. It will also delay your healing trying to make sence of things... Things most people cannot do...
Good luck!

Disappear quickly and quietly. Do not reason with them. This will further confuse you. Because you are only expecting

Also- I am not aspd.. But have dealt with one!! This is just advice from someone who's been there.

Thanks for the reply, Cotton Ball. This is all good advice. Fortunately for me, the drama is past. I have a pretty good handle on how to manipulate the manipulator.

Good. I'm glad you're doing better...
Ugh!! Be careful not to become the one you fight.
However if it's working for you I'm very glad.

"Be careful not to become the one you fight."

Yes, that's the danger. I definitely have the skills to do that, but not the personality type. If I wanted to, I could destroy his life. But I have as little desire to manipulate as I do to be manipulated.

You can attract antisocials and narcissists this way. Primary psychopaths tend to make long-term victims of narcissists by feigning empathy. However, this is very likely to backfire if done to a psychopath or decently intelligent antisocial. A narcissist needs constant affirmation of worth. Psychopaths and antisocials don't, so we're more likely to see through the ruse.

It can backfire with narcissists too, but for different reasons. Just because you've attracted them with your deception doesn't mean you can easily manipulate them. This applies more to malignant narcissists... Take my father, for example... You could easily get on his good side by playing the "yes man" and he wouldn't give much thought as to whether or not you were deceiving him. You see, he truly believes that he's magnificent enough to have an army of "yes men", so he isn't likely to see your behaviour as bizarre. But he's still in control of you. It's like you've caught a fish that's much too big for you to handle and now it's dragging you into the water.

*edit*

Also, once you enter into one of these "games"... Especially with a psychopath... It's incredibly difficult to step away. See my "game playing" morals: http://forums.psychcentral.com/showthread.php?t=224450

You hit the nail on the head!

We may have the same father.

For the most part, those actually make sense to me.

I've been very fortunate. At one point, I had at least two stalkers who were full-blown psychopaths...

I keep a tight lid on my temper. I've only lost it a handful of times. When I do, I have superhuman speed, strength and absolutely no emotions. Apparently, even a glimpse of this thing, while I can still push it back down, is enough to keep people from messing with me.

I honestly wouldn't be surprised if he had a secret "other" family...

Me, neither. He was "on the road" a lot. We were able to escape thanks to that.