[Mattmx]

Does anyone else have a hard time controlling urges towards things that are seen negatively as society? How do you control these, if you do at all? When someone bothers me, for whatever reason I always have the urge to either screw with them, or get back at them depending on the situation. Lately I've been having a lot of problems with certain people, and really all I can think about is destroying as much of them and what they have as I can. Does anyone have any advice on ways to control this temptation? Any ways to either do this in a way that won't end up with negative consequences for me? Advice on how to even possibly rationalize something like this as irrational (I know that probably makes no sense, I mean a way to make myself stop believing that something like hurting others is a good idea. I really have no problem doing something like this except for the negative repercussions it would have on me and my desires.
Thanks,
Matt

[ocdwifeofsociopath]

I can guess on how my husband does it when he does. I'm not sure he really does ever. I think he just gets more clever about it. I think he thinks ahead about where he wants consequences to affect things and I know he is really really good at being so subtle that it does not ruin things for his gain or things that can roundabout ruin things for him but still get whoever. Although he and sometimes I are the only ones who know it's still getting back at the person and satisfying the urges without serious consequences. He is also careful because he has no desire to go to prison and screw up what he's worked for. Although he's confident he could get out of just about anything he chooses not to risk it. Like I said though I'm guessing. I do know he messes with people's minds very subtly. And he's very good at it.

[livelovelearn1986]

I think maybe a cognitive behavioral therapy or talking through the underlying issues would be a more permanent solution as opposed to simple control.
Understanding your psyche your personality situations and maybe attending support groups for people who are thinking the same would help you.
Have you seen a psychiatrist? Or been diagnosed with anything?

Live Love Learn

[Mattmx]

Originally Posted by ocdwifeofsociopath

I can guess on how my husband does it when he does. I'm not sure he really does ever. I think he just gets more clever about it. I think he thinks ahead about where he wants consequences to affect things and I know he is really really good at being so subtle that it does not ruin things for his gain or things that can roundabout ruin things for him but still get whoever. Although he and sometimes I are the only ones who know it's still getting back at the person and satisfying the urges without serious consequences. He is also careful because he has no desire to go to prison and screw up what he's worked for. Although he's confident he could get out of just about anything he chooses not to risk it. Like I said though I'm guessing. I do know he messes with people's minds very subtly. And he's very good at it.

yeah this sounds a lot like me..I'm just wondering if there are people who get past those urges completely. I don't think I can.

@livelovelearn...Not quite sure what you mean.

[ocdwifeofsociopath]

I'm not sure. It seems they are so strong sometimes that how he handles it can be a great accomplishment. I don't know that they can go away. Again just guessing but I know my compulsions can't go away and can only be controlled. I don't see why sociopathic urges would be much different than OCD compulsions.

[Swabbingred]

The only way to control yourself efficiently is to be self-aware; only reason I'd imagine one afflicted with APD would control themselves is because of poor timing or repercussion that jeopardize their position of comfort. So swing away!