[Chalkdust]

I have not posted on these forums for a while but I always come to read them from time to time. I am in need of some advice. I am having a terrible time with social events. Like today, my wife is on her way (with her parents) to see her family for Easter Service and dinner. We were suppose to have a quiet dinner with just the four of us. But then suddenly this weekend it changed to driving fours hours and having dinner with about 15-20 people. I did not go. I did not use an excuse but just said I did not feel like going. I am going to our church this morning where we usually go then taking my mother (who would of been alone) out to dinner....so I am thinking what is the difference? I am still going to be AROUND people? Is it because the other people are going to have to cause me to interact more? I don't know. I feel this way at work also. I am a teacher. I do not feel comfortable at social events there either.....weather it is a fieldtrip or a PTA meeting. I usually leave as soon as possible. Infact I have not been to a PTA meeting this year at all. TRIGGER: don't read any further if your not up to it. I was attacked almost four years ago now and since then stalked also. I feel more protected lone than in groups. This does not make sense to me. I would think I would feel better in groups...you know "safety in numbers" but not so. The fact that I am male and 43 (almost 44) makes me feel like such a wimp also. So I guess the question is: what can I do about this? This anxiety of social events is taking its toll on my marriage, my work and family relationships. Is there meds for such things? Anyone have any suggestions?

Thanks so much,
Chalkdust

hello and a warm welcome to the forums......and yes there is help out there for your anxiety disorder.......my advise would be to connect with a therapist, specifically a psychiatrist who could prescribe meds and offer you some counseling.....there are medications for your disorder...best of luck.....let us know how you are doing.....people here care and can be of great comfort to you....peace julia

[Chalkdust]

thanks for the advice. I figured I need to go see someone to help me with this.......but it is nice to get advice from those who have dealt with issues as we all do.....thanks again..
chalkdust

[Chalkdust]

Doing alright today. I have not been online for a day or two. I have sought out some possible counselors just have to call and see what the prices are.

Chalkdust

so glad to hear that you're ok! thanks for letting me know

[jmo531]

(((((((((((CHALK)))))))))))

I am so pleased your feeling better today. I think that seeking counseling is a great idea. Good luck to ya. Take care.

[Myzen]

Hi Chalkdust,

This won't be much help I'm afraid, but I'd like to share my thoughts.

Something I've noticed about social anxiety, at least for me, is that we can challenge it using will power but this doesn't make it any better. With some fears, if we face up to them a few times, the fear subsides a bit, but with social anxiety (at least for me) it's always the same.

My conclusion is that maybe we find our comforts in different ways in life, some of us are more suited to the quiet life.

There's no shame in that.

Cheers, Myzen.