[wifethatwas0102]

Okay, so sometimes you CAN'T eliminate a trigger. I can't hide from my boss.

And I can't hide from my husband. He is my #1 anxiety provoker. He's newly discovered BP, and he's not under control yet. I get panick attacks coming home to him at night because I don't know what to expect. Is he manic? Is he depressed? Is he going to claim he doesn't love me and chase his grandeous dreams, or will I find him curled up on the couch crying that he doesn't deserve me? I never know what to expect. So I stress.

How do I treat a trigger I can't avoid?

[sundog]

That's a really good question. It's incredibly stressful to have to deal repeatedly with major triggers. I'm sorry that your husband is one of your biggest triggers right now. You say that his Bi Polar is newly diagnosed and isn't under control "yet". Hopefully that means he has begun treatment and that his symptoms will become much more manageable.

I hope you are getting some professional help too? Therapy, meds or both? Perhaps Couples Counseling would also be an option?

Wishing you all the very best!

[ECHOES]

There are always triggers. What you can do is learn more about you, about your reaction to triggers, explore what gets triggered. Working with your therapist can neutralize the impact of the trigger.

[Perna]

The only thing to do with triggers is dismantle them so they're not triggers. You have to decide what you want regarding your husband and work on that. Is he going for treatment, complying with it, have you been given an idea of when he will be more stable? It's a "problem" like any other and needs to be dealt with, whatever happens, as it happens, not before. Don't let yourself live in the "future" where worry lives, thinking about what he "might" be like when you get home. When you get home, deal with whatever you find as best you can for YOU.