[wi_fighter]

I had to fill out some pre-mediation paperwork and now I'm projecting all over the place because I was triggered. Is it projecting when you're afraid the same things are going to happen because you're going into the same situation with the same person and nothing psychiatrically on their end has changed since the last time? I'm trying to change, I'm trying to get help, I'm trying to stand my ground and be strong, but I'm so afraid that this guy is going to beat me into the mud again because he despises being confronted by people in positions of authority. If he gets me to back down, a judge won't make him "look like an idiot" again. My take on this is "Then don't do idiotic things. Be a responsible parent."

After filling out those papers and answering the questions about history of abuse and am I afraid to meet with him, now I'm full of anxiety that he's going to pull the same stunts as last time and make me question my sanity.

This isn't a lawyer question, so I'm not going to waste retainer money on calling him. I just talked to human services late Friday about something similar, so it's too early to call them back. I feel like I'm all alone right now except for you guys, and you're tired of hearing me rehash the same things over and over again.

[Parker10]

SOrry you are going thru a hard time. Being new here, I dont know what is going on in your life - but I sure do hope things turn out good for you !!!

Shirley, I'm really sorry that filling out those papers upset you so much. I think I'd react the same way. Men have always intimidated women during and after divorces and you and I both have experienced it....I wish I knew what would help your anxiety level now....can you take a brisk walk? Anything to get your mind off of it. Just remember this, the only way he can get your goat, is if you put a rope on it and lead it to him.....love, pat

[jmo531]

(((((((((((((((WI Fighter))))))))))))

[wi_fighter]

Thanks Parker, Pat, and Jen.

I'm still waiting on word from the Harbor House people. I know it takes time, because a lot of the things that need revision that I'm nervous about, they've never even heard of. They have to do a little extra digging before they can give me an answer.

There weren't any support groups available yesterday; I can't make it to the one tonight because my son has a class at the same time in a different town. They used to have some Harbor House groups right here in my little pop. 3000 town, but the husbands kept sabotaging their wives attempts to go, so the leader had to cancel them because no one could make it. :angry: The closest meetings are 25 miles away and are only on weeknights. Difficult when the kids have homework, I'm still trying to finish up work, they're saying they're starving, and I don't have enough gas money budgeted to go to as many meetings as I'd like to. Difficult, but not impossible. I have the ability to work when I want, as long as I want, make as much money as I want, but when you're a bundle of nerves, sometimes you can't even earn enough to break even. But after my mini meltdown yesterday, I got back in a good work groove and caught up from when I got behind last week. Now I just have to stay in that mind set.

OK, so he's still the same manipulative *****, textbook case in fact. I've got knowledge on my side this time. That means I should just have to follow the proven tactics to come out with my mental health intact, right? Or, er, um, should I say no worse than it is now? LOL

i am super proud of you....comparing your post today with one a week ago and i can see how far you've come. you should be proud of yourself today........p

[chitown]

You are awesome WI! Kick Butt and take names! I am proud of you