[BrokenNBeautiful]

I'm Bill and I'm agoraphobic.

The following might upset some of you.

Cause i'm going to talk about my experience with recovery from agoraphobia and I did it in spite of therapy. This post is geared toward myself and those of you who have trouble with therapy.

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I had to leave my psych place cause they were abusive to me. They did not seem to understand my problem. I was ag because I was scared of being sexually abused again. Also, because my self-esteem was very down because a friend of mine had kicked me out of his home in 1996 and at that time, too, a man had romantically rejected me. Not to mention, another abusive relationship.

when I tried to process this in treatment, they would not let me address my abuse/self-esteem issues. The idea there was that I was "crazy" and "didn't know what I was saying". I dealt, also with some misogynistic men and women there.

Well, for 8 years, this went on and I finally left treatment because not only did they have that attitude, they were outright outrageously abusive to me. An example: While I was in the hospital van, two ppl sitting on either side of me tried to molest me and when I called for h elp, the driver threatened to kick ME off the van and tried to arrange it so that I couldn't ride the van anymore. That was the final straw.

I am going to mention in my letter to the State Licensing Board that I was in treatment there for 8 years---and it was a waste. I had not left before cause I was desperate. I had nowhere to go.

But that was before I met my husband Dane and my ACoA sponsor, Ani.

I processed all my self-esteem/abuse issues with them and they LISTENED. The UNDERSTOOD. They DID NOT JUDGE ME.

that is why I love these sites.

Ppl here UNDERSTAND.

I am not knocking therapy; I am happy for anyone who is fortunate enough to find the right therapy/therapist who can work with them. But I did not.

If anyone is discouraged, don't give up! Find a friend, a site, a place, anything to keep you going!

You deserve it; you are worth it.

So hang in there.

some understanding and TLC can go a LONG WAY.

Billi

[ECHOES]

I processed all my self-esteem/abuse issues with them and they LISTENED. The UNDERSTOOD. They DID NOT JUDGE ME.

That is wonderful! Congratulations.
Help is help, no matter where it comes from.
I'm sorry you had an unhelpful experience with therapy. It was not the therapy you needed. It does not sound like this was a person who does depth work.
I find the same help and results with psychotherapy, but it took looking for the kind of therapy I wanted to make that happen.

It is so good that you are feeling better

[theotterone]

I saw this post and thought "oh crap, I did it again..."

Went out on Friday night, have not gone anywhere all weekend, tomorrow morning may be a bit tough...

I don't know why I manage to do this every weekend, but I do...