[OrangeMoira]

I joined PC in '08, but I haven't contributed much because I'm so afraid to say the wrong thing!

I was able to partly kick my face to face social anxiety for a while, but talking on the phone and writing online were and are big problems.

Now I'm having trouble face to face again, too. I'm a student, and I keep bailing on events and skipping classes. I've finally realized how bad it has all gotten again, so I'm trying to work on it.

I really appreciate all the encouragement and advice on PC, even when I can't get myself to log on and say thanks for it.

[daytimedreamer]

I have the same problems. I barely say anything on here.

My life has imploded and now I do nothing except hide in my house. Glad you are not letting it get to this point before you ask for help.

Everyone here is a VIP. We are here to learn, encourage and offer support. Keep on posting. Forget about mistakes. We all are fallible. The more you post the easier it gets.

Be well.

Hey there OrangeMoira, glad to see that you're trying to tackle your social anxieties...they're very hard to overcome! Personally, I have issues with talking on the phone and larger social events. I always refuse to answer the phone at my house...but whenever I manage to make a phone call, I feel pretty darn good afterwards.

Are you currently seeing a therapist, psychologist, or psychiatrist? Do you have somebody close to you, such as a family member, who understands what you're going through? Having a support system is very important. Sometimes medication can alleviate anxiety, although it isn't for everyone.

Please keep us updated on how you're doing, whenever you can. Feel free to send me a message anytime if you need to chat, good luck!

[Hippie]

Posting on here is safe. Take it from one with big trust issues! Keep practicing and remember, folks here are really non-judemental.

[Hippie]

See, I can't even type "non-judgemental" without misspelling it but do it anyway
Good luck to you

[OrangeMoira]

Thanks, everyone!

Ohseedee, yes I've just started again with a therapist. It helped a lot the last time things got this bad. The first time I saw him, he asked whether I wanted to schedule another appointment by phone and I knew if we left it there I would never go again. I will try to bring that up next time.

Kallinite, I'm sorry things are so hard for you right now. I've only had a few weeks where I was trapped in the house and it felt awful. I really appreciate the support and understanding!

Some of my anxiety tends to be closely linked to perfectionism. I don't expect anyone else to be perfect, but I think I have to be. I will try to stop rewriting every post 20 times and then giving up.

Hell, OrangeMoira. These articles may help: http://caps.unc.edu/index.php?option...=515&Itemid=65

http://psychcentral.com/lib/2009/15-...e-distortions/

Good luck.

How are you doing, OrangeMoira?

[OrangeMoira]

I really like those links; thanks a lot!

I'm practicing anti-perfectionism in my emails. For the last week, I don't re-write more than once, and I don't go back and re-read it after it's been sent. (Because what good will that do anyway?)

I think it's helping because I am keeping up with emails more. It's hard work to agonize over everything!

[slowinmi]

OrangeMoira,

Just wanted to say hi and let you know that you are not the only one who struggles with some of those issues. I recently joined PC and was afraid to post also, but everyone is so supportive that it takes alot of the fear away.

Now I just have to work on some of the other stuff. I realized the other day that I have only been out of the house 1 time in the last week. Good thing I have work on Tuesday! lol Let us know how you are doing.

[pondbc]

Hi Orange,
Had a great therapist who gave me this advice (and please pardon my French)

"If anyone is critical, piss on them!! There are so many nice people in the world, don't worry about the a-holes. And in any case, people are so wrapped up in themselves, they don't really notice what others are doing."

I found answering the phone tons better when I put call display on. I still find it just about impossible to answer the front door. And I don't like large numbers of people in the house at once (feels like an invasion, too overwhelming).

Keep posting.....it makes you feel 'exposed' at first, doesn't it? But as time goes on you will be more spontaneous.

Good for you, OrangeMoira. How wonderful for the progress you are making.