[vintageromance]

I have a lot of anxiety about my husband going places. I'm always worried about something bad happening to him (mainly car accidents). He wants to hang out with some of his guy friends on Monday. He said he'd be gone from 10am-8pm. I'm already a wreck just thinking about it. He said he'd text me if he goes anywhere with his friends, like to a restaurant or something, but that'll only help a little, I think.

What I'm mostly afraid of is not what'll happen to him but what'll happen to me. Eight hours is such a long time to sit with severe anxiety, the racing thoughts, and all of the physical symptoms that go along with it. I'm terrified of the anxiety that I'll have to endure until he comes home. What am I supposed to do? How am I going to handle this? I don't want to sit at home and deal with all the 'what if's', the nausea and upset stomach, the restlessness.

I really need some advice or ideas about how to cope. I'm so afraid.

[Soul Quake]

Do you have friends or relatives you can get together with, or talk to throughout the time he is gone? Use some distracting techniques. Make an itinerary for Monday, and keep yourself occupied.

[vintageromance]

Originally Posted by Soul Quake

Do you have friends or relatives you can get together with, or talk to throughout the time he is gone? Use some distracting techniques. Make an itinerary for Monday, and keep yourself occupied.

I don't have anyone but my mom. I plan on spending time with her that day, but I don't have much planned except to sit around and talk with her. What are some ways to keep myself occupied? I'm so lost when it comes to distracting myself.

[justfloating]

((((((((vintageromance))))))))

Some ideas for distracting yourself:
- Go to a movie/watch a movie at home
- Go for a coffee
- Clean something (when I'm anxious, I do dishes)
- Do something creative. Drawing, crafts, writing ... something you can absorb yourself in
- Listen to music. When I'm anxious, I put on some really energetic music, turn it up as loud as I can, and then focus all my energy on trying to sing louder than the stereo. Belting it out as loud as possible helps release some of that nervous energy and clears my head.

Hope this helps

[protector1973]

find a local community group and ask if you can help out for the day, helping others is the cure for ourselves sometimes, we need to escape the prison of our minds, do this by helping someone else.

[vintageromance]

Originally Posted by justfloating

((((((((vintageromance))))))))

Some ideas for distracting yourself:
- Go to a movie/watch a movie at home
- Go for a coffee
- Clean something (when I'm anxious, I do dishes)
- Do something creative. Drawing, crafts, writing ... something you can absorb yourself in
- Listen to music. When I'm anxious, I put on some really energetic music, turn it up as loud as I can, and then focus all my energy on trying to sing louder than the stereo. Belting it out as loud as possible helps release some of that nervous energy and clears my head.

Hope this helps

Thanks for all of the suggestions. I appreciate it a lot!

Originally Posted by protector1973

find a local community group and ask if you can help out for the day, helping others is the cure for ourselves sometimes, we need to escape the prison of our minds, do this by helping someone else.

I don't be able to do that this time, but I'll definitely keep that in mind the next time I need distracting. That sounds like such a great idea.

[Soul Quake]

Hi again. Self soothing techniques may help. Maybe not to a large extent at first, but if you keep up with them, progress will likely be made.

The thing with anxiety, as you probably realize, is that it's typically all about what might happen, rather than what is actually happening (you're already frightened prior to his departure). Staying in the moment is important, and distraction can sometimes provide that.

[vintageromance]

Originally Posted by Soul Quake

Hi again. Self soothing techniques may help. Maybe not to a large extent at first, but if you keep up with them, progress will likely be made.

The thing with anxiety, as you probably realize, is that it's typically all about what might happen, rather than what is actually happening (you're already frightened prior to his departure). Staying in the moment is important, and distraction can sometimes provide that.

Thank you very much for the link. There seem to be a lot of helpful things listed that might help a lot. I think I'll make a copy and keep it somewhere close by in case I need it.

Yes, I agree about staying in the moment. I've always struggled with 'what if's'; even when I was a kid. I get so latched onto them that they eventually stop being 'what if's and become facts. I'm reading a book right now called The Mindfulness Code which is all about learning to be in the present in order to soothe your fears and anxieties. I'm hoping that'll help me a bit since everyone keeps talking about what a good technique it is to use.