[soma]

I have this strange fear. dont really want to go into it, but I find myself having to listen for and grasp onto to certain words that end with certain letters. If i dont hear the words in a conversation or see any when i'm reading, ill go over the conversation in my mind searching for them, or I'll re-read the paragraphs in abook looking for them. I also have certain numbers that I search for on liscense plates or if the clock is going to hit the number, I don't want to look but I can't help it. I'm going insane. I swore i wasn't going to read liscense plates today but to no avail. I know it's not handwashing or anything like that but can anyone relate?

[adeline]

It sounds like obsessive compulsive behavior to me.
A compulsion can be anything that you do to relieve a specific sense of anxiety... even when you don't know why you would be having such anxiety. Lots of compulsions seem esoteric or even ridiculous to the bearer. As long as you can't suppress your thoughts about the act, and feel anxious until you've met your standards for performing the act, you are in a cycle of obsessions and compulsions.

I was never treated for my obsessive-compulsive behaviors because I always kept thinking that I could control them, but that I just wasn't trying hard enough. Although the obsessions and compulsions have to take up at least an hour of your day to qualify for OCD, you can also be diagnosed with obsessive tendencies; which, depending on your insurance provider, may or may not cover you for meds or therapy.

Do you currently take anxiolytic meds (e.g. Xanax) or anti-depressants for anxiety? The latter is often used to help reduce OCD behavior. Didn't work for me, but I respond badly to SSRI's anyway.

Jessie

[SleepsWithButterFlies]

I agree it sounds a lot like OCD and nothing to fear.....if you have a T mention this they can help you

[soma]

I've attempted to take Zoloft, but it didn't agree with me. I also tried Lexapro but that was in the beginning of all this and I thought I could still handle this by myself so i stopped taking that. I see someone on Monday, so round 3 with the meds.I also have anxiety and depression and I am finnaly coming to grips that I can't handle it anymore by myself. This is an excelent tool, I am ecstatic I'm not alone. I'm so sick of feeling alone.

[SleepsWithButterFlies]

No you are not alone..and myself I am not convinced those meds help OCD I ,,,,,as in IMO think CBT therapy is best ...a lotta meds like you mention just make for more anxiety..I would also suggest a great book called THE ANXIETY AND PHOBIA WORKBOOK.....it has case studies in it too and tests you will see you are sooo NOT alone