Does anyone relate

with being a child?

I know that most of us don't hold our childhoods, or some/most of it. I accepted/knew that a long time ago. This is a bit different than just not remembering, though.

I'm learning about the childhood here and see the thinking and I've realized that I'm asking questions of t like, "Do children that age really think like that?". I've realized that I have no clue about age appropriate thought processes or really anything else that might be age appropriate because most, if not all, of this childhood has been held and compartmentalized.

Has anyone else noticed/realized this?

kd

Did I make any sense at all in asking what I'm trying to ask? LOL. I hope so.

Love,

kd

I know what you mean.

I have no concept what is age appropriate. It doesn't help that my son is disabled b/c he is totally off as far as being "age appropriate".

I have friends who have children and I've asked stupid questions and listened to them talk and I have no idea when things are supposed to happen and what age things begin.

It's really odd.

Thinking about it now ... I listen to many of my girlfriends and even my sister with their new baby's talking about when they will begin cereal and all those things ...and I can't remember anything about my own son.

When he began all his "firsts"

I always wonder how do this ppl register all this stuff?

Well I guess I can relate to what you're saying and that's nice to know.

Eva

(((((((((((((Eva)))))))))))))))

Thank you.

It's hard to get the information about childhood and then sit there and wonder if I'm getting the information correctly because I don't know that children that age really have the capability of such thoughts and processes because I can't connect with anything else during the same time or remember friends the same age (if I had any) and how they acted/thought.

So, I'm always second-guessing what I see and correct and not altered by my thinking today, before I work on "accepting".

This is really tough to explain and I so appreciate the relation.

kd

age appropiate. I did and didnt. some thing I knew because I have always been taking care of someones child including brothers and sisters since a very young age. But I also didn't because some of the things I was going through at various ages I thought was perfectly normal for kids my age. and also when buying things in stores now they all have age labels on them but still Boy did I get a wake up of age approiaite things now a days when I took two parenting classes. LOL.

I understand what you are talking about....It is hard for me to related to my own children....sometimes I am the same age that they are.... it gives me panic and very anxious.
Lilith

Oh wow, I thought it was because of the Asperger's Syndrome.
Yeh, me too. I'm never sure so I just go with being an eccentric so it doesn't matter so much any more. Ya know what I mean? What is age let alone what is age appropriate??
The more questions I find answers for, the more questions pop up.....

Yes, Kitty. I didn't realize it until I started therapy. I didn't have a "normal" childhood and so how could I, or anyone else in the same situation, know what "normal" is? It's actually a relative term. We all have our own sense of normal: opening gifts Christmas Eve vs Christmas morning, eating breakfast vs not - know what I mean/

I always felt lost when trying to relate and raise the kids. Of course, most of that time I was in Protector mode and lived most of my life with anhedonia without knowing it (funny how much a "label" can explain). I always felt bad about missing so much because I couldn't and never had myself experienced it. Sorry, I'm bumming myself, and proboblly others, out. (Edit if you need to. I understand.)

In the short, yah, I know what you mean. You're not alone.
Anne

my friend won't let his oldest babysit... and they are 10-12 (the oldest kids are). It amazed me. I always took care of my brothers at that age, cleaned, cooked, ironed, etc. His kids are very smart but they are also very young...they are kids. I don't relate to that.

I am still very much a "kid" in the way I relate to ppl though. My fears. They hate me. I wanna hide. Its my fault. I did it.

Its so wierd. I'm this really responsible insecure kid still.. what a F*ed up mess i am.

Age appropriate huh... well thats too hard to know all by yourself when you have had a childhood that doesn't really match up with what they say is the norm. My T tells me whats age appropriate cos I dont really know. My childhood was normal for me but hardly what one would call appropriate. I remember being in a class one day and the topic was developmental stages .. wow .. was I shocked, then sad, then kept quiet. I eventually gave up the class, it was too triggering and too sad. Too many of us were grown ups way before our time.

I was interested in hillbunnyb's comment about aspberger too, I was told by a T that we have an alter that is aspberger. Have been given some examples of our behaviour and thought processes that certainly match that, but have no awareness of them myself. I wonder how much of aspberger symptoms cross over with mpd/did symptoms.

Jabe

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dont know if this even comes close to answering your question

but nut shell --- YES and NO

tc
z

Thank you all so much! You know, it's so wonderful to be able to know I'm not alone...even with things that I can't explain well.

I have a vague memory that's trying to surface. I think I'm stopping it because I'm dismissing it as impossible for the age. I'm finding out it's all part of my denial once again, I think.

I, honest to God, do not know what I would do without y'all sometimes.

((((((((((((all us special people))))))))))))))

kd

Yeh, bumpies for us special people:
))) ) )) ))Usns ((((((( ( ((

Go to the bookstore and get a book on Childhood Development. It will help a lot. An alternative would be a book on parenting. It will help give examples of activities that a child could/should do at each age.

(((((((((((((((((( Everyone ))))))))))))))))))

Jan