[LadybirdC]

Hi! I have a long history of generalized anxiety...gosh, you name it, from my brother's death to armed robbery, hijacking, contracting guillain barre and having to learn how to walk again...hubby has a liver tumor...I sound like a TV drama plot!

So...i am naturally an optimistic, spring back up again type of person but over the course of all these interesting challenges, I have allowed GAD to control much of my existence. i don't have fun anymore and I am losing parts of my life slowly. We are emigrating in the next few months which adds to the stress of everything but at the same time I am looking forward to the frsh start I have the slightest head pains and i think i have a brain tumour and then worry about it for days...over all the years of having a string of bad luck, I have grown to expect the worst. I am very sad that this is who I have become and I need to find a path out of it without going back on anti-anxiety meds. Any advice?

Hypnotherapy? Thanks for listening xxx

[Leed]

Why don't you want to go back on anti-anxiety medications? I certainly would if I were you.

But ~ worrying. Let's look at this realistically. What good does worrying do? It doesn't solve anythiing. It doesn't CHANGE anything. It doesn't HELP anything. If something is going to happen, it's going to happen whether you worry about it or not. But almost always, you have NO PROOF that what you're worrying about is going to happen in the first place!

That's the problem ~ PROOF. We don't have any. We worry about things -- all kinds of things, but we have no proof. Lets take your head aches -- those are most likely from stress, but you're worried their tumors even tho you have NO PROOF you have a tumor. If we do that about all things, we end up with severe anxiety and that can drive us insane!

You should see a therapist and find out the cause of the anxiety. if you can afford a therapist, at LEAST see your M.D. and get back on your anti-anxiety meds. Otherwise this is going to paralyze you! God bless and take care -- and please let me know how things turn out, will you? Hugs, Lee

[Piraeus]

I try to do things to preoccupy my mind. Reading helps. I also like to play World of Warcraft. 40 yrs old and still playing video games....lol.
You just need to find something you like to do. Good luck and many hugs.

Piraeus

[shezbut]

LadybirdC

I can understand where you're coming from. I've had a pretty dramatic past as well, physically and emotionally. So, it feels natural to expect more dramatic events to occur. It feels like common sense, in a way!

Why don't you want to take an anti-anxiety medication? Have you had bad experiences with one or more in the past? Can you explain the reason to us? Or is it just an intense fear (for no apparent reason)?

Personally, I made it through panic disorder by forcing myself to do it anyway. I was against meds at that time as well (for no real reason, I was just afraid to feel "funny"). I saw a therapist to talk about how I was feeling regularly, that helped a bit. What helped me the most was facing my fears. The reward in that style is that the payoff is nearly immediate and strong! Anytime that anxiety comes back up again, I remind myself of what it was like before ~ and I don't give in to my fears.

Meeting with a T, to talk about your thoughts and feelings should be very helpful. Maybe you didn't really spend much time focusing on your emotions during an important part of your life & you need to take a deeper look at that. Perhaps the upcoming move is bringing up a lot of memories and emotions that have been a big part of your life.

to Psych Central, btw. I hope that things improve for you soon. Please do let us know, okay? Thanks...

[Perna]

Originally Posted by LadybirdC

So...i am naturally an optimistic

I have grown to expect the worst

It's habit. If you can see the good side, make yourself stay there. Yes, bad things do/can happen but they cannot be predicted and they don't happen "more" than good ones. Stay out of the future, stay in the moment. If you find yourself straying into the future; use your good thinking and imagination (takes a good imagination to worry effectively :-) If it is future and no one can know what will happen there, you can make up good scenarios just as easily as bad ones! Make yourself laugh with your good scenarios. When you emigrate, the new location will be much cheaper and you'll live like a queen. In my case, my last move (2005) we sold our old house for $100,000 more than our new house (on the water, I have a horrible view from my bedroom balcony ;-) cost so got a "free" $100,000!

When you worry about brain tumors, remind yourself it's just a headache, take an aspirin and call yourself in the morning, see if it is still there :-) If it is and you get headaches often, then call the doctor and get a workup. Be proactive and "do" something about what you are thinking, instead of just worrying. I go to the doctor every 3 months and just don't worry anymore about many medical things because I know my physical self a lot better than I use to.

Educate yourself about things you worry about. I had a medical emergency in 2003 that lasted 5-6 months and could have killed me 2-3 times; I no longer take my health or knowledge about my body for granted. Part of the problem back then was I had never had a doctor, so no one, including myself, knew anything about my physical state since I'd never been ill before. First thing I did when I moved was get my husband and myself a doctor; now I have over 7 years really good experience and knowledge about myself and my health issues.