living with Anxiety and Panic

(i wrote this in response to a question by another member, but it seemed like something i wanted to share with you on this forum.)

when i was first incompetent, some part of me knew it, and i was terrified of the real dangers of going out, or even if the phone rang or someone knocked on the door~ i would panic. not to mention going out after i lost my car, which got so bad i would weep when forced to do so.

some one took me (bless them) to an anxiety management group, and i quickly regained the skills to manage my panic. (i have a post in both the Anxiety and PTSD forums on Anxiety Management Skills, you can read.) but whenever something "bad" did happen i would relapse. it was at least 14 years, and five 'recoveries', before something finally happened and the terror chemicals stopped flooding my system.

i am still severely agoraphobic, needing assistance to leave the house. even to go get the mail across the street, i have to "sneak out at night". gradually this is still getting better again, but a few years ago, i had an car that kept breaking down or running out of gas and stranding me, and that reset all my panic buttons.

the point is: panic and anxiety are often real responses to thoughts or feelings of inadequacy. pretending that one has the skills to go out in a crowd on christmas eve will not make them go away. learning to take care of myself and only go when i have 'accommodations' in place, such as accompaniment, is the best way for me to feel safe enough not to panic.

that being said, panic can also be a brain chemistry disorder, requiring nothing to trigger it, or something so subtle that we can't intercede. for those times, there is nothing to do but ride it out, letting the body filter the blood, eating to replace blood sugars burnt up in the adrenalin, and napping for recovery.

the best thing i have found is to accept that something is happening which i am addressing to the best of my ability; relinquish being a 'control freak' who demands that this not be happening; refrain from wailing and beating myself up; and take the steps which i have learned to manage and recover from that distress.

i hope each of you finds those things which work for you, and list them, rely upon them, be kind to yourself, and set up situations so they are supportive.
best wishes~
Gus

Thanks, Gus! I am feeling overwhelmed by anxiety - for the past few months, really. You have a really good way of putting things in proper perspective.