[Brookester]

I am dating a man who is getting his "condo" ready to rent out to vacation folks in a resort area. He has been working on this small, bachelor/single condo every weekend for six months now. He has painted the entire place four times, layed tile, carpeting, put in new fixtures, door knobs, sealant, re-wired things, re-oiled things, hand-washed and oiled all screws and metal items and hand-painted fine little pieces. He has said that this will be the last weekend for three months now, but he dreams up something else to do. This weekend he is going to put laquer on top of the four coats of paint! And even triple seal the grout when all it calls for is one time. I am very concerned. His car is a mess, he is personally very clean and neat, but what do you make of these projects in the condo? Thank you.

[anxietychick59]

Sounds like extreme OCD/perfectionism to me! I bet he's the type that likeds everything "just so!"

i'm currently involved with making lots of knit scarves for Christmas & I was just diagnosed with impetigo on my left hand! So I'm feeling out of sorts because knitting is a POSITIVE obsession of mine; I always have it with me in case I have to wait for ANYTHING.

Suggest he get some therapy or at least take an OCD evaluation.

Happy Holidays,

OCD chick

[Brookester]

Thanks, anxiety chick59, I also do believe that he needs an analysis. I think he would think that I was joking if I suggested that he get tested for OCD. I think he likes it! Maybe I will find a test and have him take it just to see how it turns out. Thanks for your response.

Brookester

[Perna]

If he's only this way about the condo, I'd imagine he was very attached to the condo and had mixed feelings about actually ever renting it out. He may just like these sorts of tasks too and not have anywhere else in his life he can do projects like this, nowhere he has such a large "artist's pallet". Sounds like he does it by himself also? That would be a wonderful time to think and be quiet within one's self, just commune with "nature" so-to-speak? Some people read or go for walks, take bubble baths or veg in front of the TV but sounds like this guy gets his relaxation oiling screws :-) I'd leave him be if he himself is not bothered by it.

[Brookester]

Thanks, Perna. I do believe he does get "lost" in his work at the condo as it is all his own and he did have to give it up so to speak for reasons he did not choose. This may very well be his outlet and source for total satisfaction!

Thank you, Perna! Maybe I'll help him paint a wall!

Brookester

[Maven]

You can't assume he has OCD because he does all these projects. He might be obsessive and compulsive about perfectionism, but that doesn't mean it's a disorder. It's only a disorder if it disrupts his life, and he doesn't enjoy it. Some people are "neat freaks" and like things to be as perfect as possible. They may have obsessive compulsive personalities; again, it's not a disorder (OCPD) unless it's a problem.

But if it's a problem for you, you need to talk to him about this. There's no harm in him going in for an evaluation, and you can suggest that. But he might just really like doing these kinds of projects.

[Brookester]

Thanks, maven. I appreciate your insight. I think this project of his is finally beginning to wear on him. He is starting to complain quite a bit, but still does not stop the chronic chores at this condo. Time will tell...