Why can't I just enjoy things like "typical" ppl?

My anxiety and panic can be debilitating at times. Simple activities that ppl love such as going out for drinks or dinner w friends, parties, concerts, spending time in the city etc I find almost paralyzingly at times. Which leads me to this weekend. I have a trip planned w my girlfriend to go to Iceland for vacation for five days. While everyone says how excited or jealous were going I am terrified. Everyone seems so
Into going away or vacations and I find them nightmarish. I'm scared I'm going to ruin the trip by getting inside my head or ruining it for my gf bc I'm so anxious. I have Klonipin as needed which I'm
Obviously going to have to take which I wish I didn't to take the edge off. This sucks. I can't enjoy anything it's bull ****

THE16THDOCTOR, Has a therapist ever worked with CBT? I had debilitating anxiety. I was so afraid of doing anything. It was hard for me to even leave the house. My psychiatrist at the time told me I had dysfunctional thinking - "What if?". I always thought the worst would happen. Consequently, this made me afraid to do anything. The psychiatrist worked with me for three months. He had me chart every day the things I was afraid to do. I had to write down what I thought would happen, what did happen and my enjoyment level. Most things I enjoyed. Some were neutral (but I did it!) and almost nothing was unpleasant (maybe I felt uncomfortable). Nothing was catastrophic like I thought it would be. This cured me of my irrational "what if?" thinking. I am so grateful he took the time to teach me how to change my behavior.

I know right? I don't ever want to do anything but what I'm used to doing, I won't spend time with friends in person unless it's all fully planned like a week before. I won't book days off for trips or things. I just don't have any time or patience for CBT.

I always blamed my feelings (just like yours) on the stress I suffered from having a partner with dp. However, we are now broken up and I still find I'm worried about doing things that should be making me happy, like seeing friends, shopping, etc. I keep saying I want to make more effort with my friends, but then when we actually make plans, I try to think of excuses not to go. I feel horrible for doing it and then, if I cancel, I sit home feeling bad for not going! I wonder how long those feelings were there and if maybe I had this problem longer than I'm thinking? Although most times I actually enjoy myself once I'm out. Does your friend know you get anxious? Having her aware and able to support you might help. Just know that you're not alone in not being able to fully enjoy all these things other people do!