[nonamegame]

Hello. Okay I'm not sure how to start the story, so I'll just go with what I think will get my point across the best. My cat Morgan picked me as his favorite when he was a kitten, and I have loved him dearly all 4 years of his life. No problems or anything. But about 6 months ago my friend's cat passed away of Urtheral Obstruction, and they were far too poor to get him the help he needed. It was horrifying to me because not only did I have to see this cat slowly dying with my own eyes, but up until then I had never realized how bad it could be to be so low income with a pet. Then a month after my cat got into a small accident where he lost about half of his tail, and I couldn't feed myself because I had to pay his horrendous vet bills. Since then I have bee losing my mind over this cat.

I constantly cry when I think even the slighest thing is wrong with him. He peed on the floor just this morning and I was hysterical. I went from cleaning his litter box every other night to every single time I walk past it, just to be sure he is using the bathroom enough. I am in a poor financial state and if something was actually wrong with him I'd have to make the choice of putting him down or surrendering him. Which is bad, becuse as well as causing me crippling anxiety...This cat is a therapy cat. So when I'm not weeping about him, I'm weeping about other things, and he serves as a way to keep myself mentally stable.

But apparently I can't even have that. I've started spending money I don't have on extra wet food for him to make sure he gets enough moisture not to develop an illness in his kidneys or bladder. I'm saving up my pennies to get him his boosters (which are 3 years overdue), and I'm pining over him every moment in absolute fear that one day I'll wake up and he will be dying. I've started praying at night for him to be okay, and I'm not even religious! I've started losing sleep, and stopped eating because almost every time I look at my own pet my heart drops in worry. This is killing me. I can't stand to lose him. I don't know what to do.

[Quarter life]

Hi nonamegame.

Pets can be a strain financially and are a big responsibility. I know you say that this cat is for therapy, but your pet seems to be causing you a lot of stress.

Wouldnt it be best to re-home your dear cat while it is still young?...where he can get the health care that it needs?

You need to make yourself priority #1 and be kind to the cat.

[junkDNA]

i stress over my cat's health too. my beloved cat of 8 years died in jan 2014 and it was devastating to me. i feel like im constantly worried something is wrong with the cat i have now. im always feeling his body to see if he losing weight (he has long fur so its hard to tell by just looking). that's what happend to my old cat, he lost a lot of weight and had kidney failure. i understand your anxieties around your cat..

[ManOfConstantSorrow]

Vets bills can be so vast cat insurance is a must.

The Peoples Dispensary for Sick Animals provides help where pets needs exceed people's resources. https://www.pdsa.org.uk

[*Laurie*]

nonamegame and junkdna, we are soul-mates. I have pretty much gone crazy over fear of my cats getting sick and dying. I was not low-income when I got my cats, but I am now, and some of them have been in my family for many, many years. I worry OBSESSIVELY about them. I love them so very much, but I cannot enjoy them because I have gone nuts worrying about them.

nonamegame, I don't believe you need to rehome your cat; I think that's a cruel thing to tell you to do. It is very hard to find a good home for a cat. When all is said and done, a rescued animal needs love more than anything else. That is my experience from owning many pets over the decades.

As for your anxiety, no it is not normal. Neither is mine. I work hard at practicing mindfulness, work with my breathing, try my best to trust some in the universe...that it will care for me and my cats. These tools help, but they take HARD work and are not magic. I am in a deep depression/anxiety because of my obsessive worry, the fear that I will not be able to properly care for my cats.

Bottom line is, I believe this type of obsessive anxiety has far more to do with ourselves than with our pets. I am terrified of how fast time passes, how fast life goes by, how illness and death steal loved ones away from me - and, eventually, me from them. Pets or people, it's all the same terror. The trick is how to cope.

[Daphnelover]

I am a lisenced vet tech. You are providing your cat with shelter, adequate food, and love. That is what matters. I PM'd you with some practical suggestions about diet and vaccines and how to plan for emergencies/health issues. We do the best that we can. Unfortunatley, we just about always outlive our pets. We provide for them as best as we can while they are here and you are doing that. This furry friend is causing you anxiety instead of providing relief. Fear of what may come tomorrow is robbing you of your joy today. Reversing this mindset is tough.. I struggle with it, too. Good luck

[Avienne]

I think it is wonderful to read how much you all care about your animals, like me to the point of completely freaking out. I had a terrible year pet-wise, my oldest dog lost both his eyes to glaucoma, second had cancer in her uterus, third is still struggling with severe allergies. I had to ask my dad to help out with my old horse so I wouldn't have to sell him, and I'm so glad he would, because who wants a 25-year old horse with arythmia? I mock all the stables and care for his 7 ponies to try and make up for it.

Even though I am low income, I have been saving up. Putting 20 to 50 aside each month. Sometimes I had to dig into those funds to eat, but mostly the amount grew slowly. So when they got sick, I was prepared and could focus on them instead of the money. The other big thing is prevention. Some use vitamin C to protect the urin tract. I use flax seed oil for skin and cognitive functions. Talk to your vet or look online for more, search for the ailments you worry about most, or that occur a lot. I also stumbled upon a vet, who mostly treats farm animals, a young guy who started his own practice so he doesn't have all the expensive equipment yet. That translates to low bills. When things get serious he'll redirect me to a specialist.

And don't forget to learn from your pets ability to just live for today! I don't think your cat worries about him getting sick and you being able to pay the bills. He's just happy you took good care of him today, to cuddle up on your lap this cold night, to wake up and know you're there and trying your best.

nonamegame you give your cat food, shelter, and love. You're doing a great job. I think someone mentioned that this seems to be more of an issue of your anxiety that a health issue for your cat. If so I agree. Try to address that issue. Take care of yourself