Ruminating - no one understands

I find myself thinking about things over and over and I feel like
I'm going mad because nobody understands. I feel extremely anxious about certain situations or things I've said, or sometimes it will be something that wasn't even that bad but I'll keep ruminating on it anyway. I don't know what to do. I was in therapy and my T wasn't sure what it was either. Can anyone else relate? Even if I could understand why it's happening that would help. It's mental torture.

I can totally relate. You need to make a conscious effort to stop that kind of thinking and when you catch yourself ruminating start thinking about something positive. I know it's not easy, but you need to replace the negative thoughts with positive thoughts.

When I ruminate I basically replay the same movie over and over in my head and I become more miserable. It was pure torture. I don't ruminate as much anymore. My counselor helped me with CBT and how to look at situations differently.

Thanks for this post, Eleny. Never thought about it before, but you made me realize that I do this. Thinking about the things I have ruminated about, I think I do it when I want to resolve/repair (at least in my head) something that occurred.

Ruminating is a kind of reality check. Its the dread of specific events and occurrences, the villification of persons, institiutions and entities, and the self-condemnation within the rumination that may create personal states of panic and anxiety and\or feelings of cognitive distress. What one chooses to ruminate upon {to digest more thoroughly} is similar to choosing numbers in a lottery.

The thematic rumination consisting of one having said or revealed something forbidden is primitive and learned. What are the consequences that one has come to dread so desperately over these violations, over these taboos probably learned with speech itself. Of course it is possible for one to say the wrong thing and there are villains waiting to tax such mistakes but there is nothing specific about these issues so worthy of cognitive repetition, these issues one reviews for the thoroughly dreaded "slip betwixt the cup and lip" so infamous . Just as one abandons one's self to the pleasure of brain thrusting, thought provoking, invigorating conversation, then follows the dread, the guilt, the personal villainization, the peronal persecution--guilt. Is it that one has said something wrong or is it that one has abandoned one's self to the decadent oral pleasure of dialogue, of conversation? That is the place that I have reached related to the content of your post. That is what I relate.

Rumination is the biggest source of depression for me - in fact it got so bad, the rumination I believe was the cause of my last hospitalization.

I try to avoid it at all costs. Specifally, I do not keep a journal. Doing so previously just resulted in endless gripe about how I have been wronged or how things just aren't good/right. I also make an effort not to ruminate when I am alone or even - a favourite place to do so - in the shower.

Do you obsess about other aspects of your life? My therapist had me complete a Y-BOCS (Yale Brown Obsessive Compulsive Scale) worksheet. The result was she placed me on the combination of therapy (specifically working on self worth) and anti-obsessive medication. I am whole lot happier and have not experienced rumination since.

Here is the Y-BOCS checklist:

https://www.google.ca/url?sa=t&sourc...WN5h241aYjxLiw

I find I can go back and forth from rumination to avoiding things completely ... and am not always consciously aware of it. Either way is annoying!

Thanks a lot for this, I actually tick alot of these obsessive boxes. Is your therapist a CBT therapist?

Thanks justafriend, I can see a couple there for me - checking and fear of not saying just the right thing.

Eleny, I can understand, I replay difficult situations over and over and it's exhausting. The way I describe it is like my brain desperately trying to make sense of a situation.

That OCD checklist didn't really cover relationship and situation rumination. I have what OP is describing, too. Look into ROCD (relationship OCD).

Ruminating is a big part of my OCD. I tend to ruminate during certain bipolar mood episodes. I ruminate about something and try to stop. I often immediately start ruminating about something else. It's my brain on auto pilot. It's frustrating and stressful.

YIKES! That felt like a to-do list when I clicked on it. Shoot.

I'm glad you've gotten help and the ruminating is under control. I need to spend some time on tackling my OCD. So much effort goes into managing my bipolar disorder. And I have a string of other anxiety disorders and chronic pain. I feel so overwhelmed. I'm going to see my pdoc tomorrow.

I can definitely relate. For me I ruminate about things I am ashamed of, or wish I would've done but didn't, or some future event practicing what i will say so or do. I think it is fear, or shame, or both, and i can't turn it off, (not just with thought anyway). However, I've been into SE (somatic experiencing) for a bit now, as i have a chronic pain issue and that is where therapy has lead. It seems to me that fear is slowing down thru slowing down my body's response to fear?