[TaintedGoth1]

I went into the chat room the other day...just thinking I could chat with people...but I didn't like how I felt.

I just felt this intense fear...not at all how I feel when I'm talking one on one with someone...kinda like the other people in the room hated me, didn't want me there, wanted me gone...I know that's probably not what they were thinking but I was just so terrified....it was like they were here in the room with me....more than one person in the same room as me? Not good for my nerves!

I'm sure you're wondering how I go out in public??? I only go out in public once a week and I have to be with a family member or close friend at all times...or I basically freak out. I don't go down any aisles if other people are in those aisles in the store...I don't like to go...don't like being trapped.

Sometimes I can be ok...if I'm constantly doing something, having my attention distracted...I'm ok. But don't let me be alone and don't let me have time to think. Just get in there and get out as quickly as possible.

Needless to say, I didn't stay in the chat room for long. I don't remember who was in there...just 2 other people....felt like I was an intruder and I wasn't welcome. I had to leave...I didn't even say goodbye because I was panicking a bit.

How am I gonna cope with being in public if I can't even cope with being in a freakin chat room?

[I_WMD]

>> . Goth1,,,,, ,,,, Go into chat again ,, a few times more ...As you get the hellos' and hI s' ,,, Sit back and watch what the topic is ,,, Ya don't have to ask,,,,

Most of the time a couple of peeps that have spent support room time with ,, May just be catching Up .
Another thing ,, you not the only one that has anxiety in crowds ,, whether in real world >>> or cyber .

But ,,,,, just figure ,, at some point in time you will see and meet others that are same or close to Dx,
And forums here speak on most all topics ,, Read some of the posts in stuff like Meds. >> Health ,, Grief ,, . Relationships .

Recognizing others that share your ,, commonalities,, likenesses,, Even ,, if you may think you are intruding ??
Take the time to observe..... Think about that grocery store ,, and , maybe just being there in a chat room will be a hurdle YOU >>>> . Overcome in time ,..

[BrnEyedGrl]

OMG...I can totally relate to how you feel. I went in the chat rooms just one time and I was so nervous that I basically sat in for a minute, didn't know what to say , and I was out that quick. I just felt really uncomfortable too, like I was intruding on a personal conversation.
I know there are really nice people on this site though and they would make me feel welcome, it was just scary. I will try again I'm sure.
And also I just wanted to tell you that Im dealing with some agoraphobia issues and cannot really go out unless Im with someone else as well.
If ya need to talk, send me a mssg anytime!
It can be so hard, but maybe talking to others with the same problems will help. Just take it one day at a time and maybe try again and see what happens.
Take care....

[Dawr]

I feel the same thing a lot of the time.

I know it's not true, but I always thing everyone is thinking bad, negative thoughts about me. I'm scared people don't want me around, or are just being nice because they don't want to hurt my feelings, when in reality they hate my guts.

That's actually one of my biggest fears.

You're not alone.

[TaintedGoth1]

Thank you for your replies. It makes me feel a little better that other people have difficulties with this as well and are thinking the very same things as me!

Dawr...you took the words right out of my brain! Those are exactly the things I think, too!

I did sit in there for a few minutes, trying to pick up on the conversation but it seemed...I dunno...couldn't figure for the life of me what the other two were talking about...but that feeling of impending doom got stronger and stronger. I just had to leave.

I really am glad that my post wasn't ignored and that there are others here who have the same difficulties as me.

[Rio_]

I've never been in the chatrooms here (I did try once, but it crashed my computer) so I'm not sure if this would work...but is there any way you could go in anonymously and just look around until you feel comfortable chatting? That way you wouldn't have to worry about people judging - which I'm sure they don't do, but all the same, it might make things easier.

I don't find chatrooms easy, either, but I'm mostly worried about people getting impatient with me - when I'm posting in forums I always check my responses before submitting them, and I'll sometimes try out a few different phrasings so I can hopefully get my point across more effectively...if I tried to do the same in chatrooms, people would be waiting about five minutes for me to reply every time they said something to me.

Anyway, hope you can find something that works. If you don't like the chatrooms, there's nothing wrong with just sticking to the forums, anyway.

[lavendersteph]

sweetie i use to feel the same way going out once my pdoc got me on the right meds everything changed for me and i know things will change for you too i also did suffer from agoraphobia i know how it feels and as for chat room go back and just listen to what ppl are talking about and if you feel comfortable then speak up we here at pc are a family so you are part of it i hope you realize that hun we love you here and seeing all your posts so cheerup you got family here to hold your hand here too love stephy

[PsyChris]

I will be happy to help you integrate into the chat room if you would like. I promise not to pass judgment or build any expectations. Anything I can do to help you ease into that social situation.

It could in theory help you with some of the bigger problems you are facing to conquer this one.

It has been my experience that everyone in the chat rooms are friendly and have much in common with each other.

[Fuzzybear]

[sabby]

(((((((((( Tainted )))))))))))

Chatrooms can be very difficult for many people on many different levels. Sometimes the chat goes too quickly to be able to follow....sometimes you feel like you intruded....sometimes you may feel like you don't "fit in".

Many times, people in the chatrooms have known each other for a longer period of time so they have that give and take of communication that you feel left out of....but purely because you are don't know these folks or them you.

I've seen some folks come in and sit for awhile, never saying a word and then leaving when they need to. And that is quite alright! Do what you feel comfy doing. If it's a matter of feeling unsafe, you can always check to see if there is a mod/admin in the chatroom before joining. If you would feel more comfy with one of us there....that's fine. You can private message us in the chatroom and let us know you are feeling "off" and need some help. We're there to help you through the experience if that's what you would like.

And then again, maybe chat isn't the place for you right now. And that's ok too! Get to know the folks on the forums first, where you feel more comfortable...maybe doing some pm's back and forth with other members....that may help you work into the chat realm at some point when you are feeling stronger.

Remember...the important thing is to do what feels comfortable for you....and to try new things when you are feeling a bit stronger and willing to push yourself through your fears. We're all here to support you in whatever you decide to do.

Take good care!


sabby

[TaintedGoth1]

Aww...thanks for all the wonderful support.

I just feel like I'm so messed up anymore. I remember the last time I was here I could go into the huge chat when DocJohn was in chat and through all those people I'd be fine...no problems whatsoever! And now I get in there and my fight/flight goes into overdrive and it's screaming RUN!

[lavendersteph]

awww sweetie it's gonna be ok it may seem hard now but things have a way of fixing themselves from my opinion i hope you get well soon hun i really wish the best for you love steph

[TaintedGoth1]

OOH! I went to the chat room today...I stayed beyond the first few minutes even! Oh it was a success!!!!

[lavendersteph]

congrats hun super proud of you and it will get easier pm when you want to go in chat i'll be there quick i feel like we are going to be really great frineds love steph