Going Out With Friends

for my social anxiety, my T suggested that I try to do something at least once a week with my friends. How can I do that when all my friends like to do is go to parties?? I don't want them to feel like they have to do something different to include/accomodate me...I told her that my friends like to club alll the time and yet she insists i try to do something with them...Clubs are something I will never be able to do. I hate being around ton of people tightly packed together in small spaces, not to mention I am tiny (5 feet) and that makes it all the worse. I did use to go to clubs, but I was usually drunk Which doesnt help anything.

Now what? I just do things by myself? I hate doing things by myself, but looks like it's going to end up that way Doing things alone doesn't help with my social anxiety either.Cuz Im still not interacting with anyone...the only activity I like doing by myself is going to the gym(only cuz i can stay there forever and wouldnt want to drag someone with me). So the gym it is...i guess....I hate this!!!!!!!!!! Why cant i just be friggin normal....I hate myself!!!!

i don't think i could go to a club either these days. maybe they go out to eat first or something? you could go for part of the night but not all of it.

the thing with gyms is that 'alone in a crowd' feeling. does your anxiety mean you don't like being around people? or that you don't like interacting with them?

I dont mind the gym or going to the grocery store or interacting with the teller at the bank. I get anxious interacting with people (mainly in groups). I work as a customer service rep and I love my job and my customers, odd for some one with social anxiety, but when I have to interact in a group, I think I get anxious because there are too many people for me to have to "anaylyze" or pay attention to...I start worrrying about what everyone is thinking about me, what I look like, I hate having all eyes and attention on me etc and get all these what ifs running through my head(what if i say something stupid, what if i am not interesting to them, what if I dont have anything to say etc). I am so focused on those thoughts and trying to "figure" everyone out, that i can't focus and just be in the moment, ya know?

I forgot to add, even though they are my friends I still get those anxious feelings around them--like I am not good enough to be around them, not fun enough etc (though not as bad when I am in a group around complete strangers--whats when fear is unleashed in me and I just cant function) and I have known them since 4th grade. All of this started second semester of my freshman year in college... So I was thinking I can hang out with them and get my comfort level back within my own group of friends and then go from there. I don't know. Maybe I am destined for a life of miserable solitude. I will figure this out...hopefully....thanks!

(((((((((( lifelesstraveled )))))))))))))))))
I get what you are saying, can you invite your friends over to just hang out instead of going somewhere together? What I have found helpful is joining group therapy and when I am in a group setting like family get togethers I try to at least interact with two people.

Are you sure you aren't me??? You just described me, therefore I have no words to help you other than you aren't alone in your feelings!!