[kptclutch]

Hey everyone,

I've been taking Adderall since 2005. I began college in 2011 and have done very well, maintained a 3.8 GPA and an 18 credit hour workload.

But when I think about who I was before adderall came into my life, I really wonder if its really even me that's accomplishing these milestones. It's depressing to think that the key to my competence is locked in a capsule.

I live a healthy lifestyle with regular exercise and proper nutrition. Currently weighing in at 181 pounds at 6'2. My dosage is 20mg.

I guess my questions are as follows: can 20 mg of adderall xr change a person from slob to awesome? Is this a high dosage for an active adult? Does anyone else question who they are and who they would be if they never had taken the drug?

[2_b_free]

adderall doesn't change you - it helps you to focus on how to change. when something is overwhelming you don't know where to begin, adderall helps you to chop things into manageable pieces and focus on one piece at a time.

High dosage - depends on the person, I take adderall 20mg 3x/day

Before and after adderall, I am still the same, but my life is not in shambles.

[kptclutch]

Ok, that makes me feel a little bit better.

I get anxious sometimes when I think about not having the medication. Almost like I know a day will come when I don't have it and a major challenge will arise that I can't handle with my normal brain chemistry.

Do you ever have thoughts like this?

[2_b_free]

I don't like how foggy and confused I used to get. Like my depression meds, I take them because I need to.

[Katielolxxx]

I've been without my adderall a few times because I legit lost it, and because of the dosage I'm on and it being a controlled substance.. I wasn't able to fill it. Withdrawal of adderall sucks especially when you've been on it for a while. But, it doesn't change you as a person.. In my opinion it makes you a better person in the sense that it gives you the organization , and motivation that you need without the distractions . You're able to get things done that people without add/ADHD could do with no problem. In our case, that is our problem.. We can't get what is needed to be done since our brain doesn't read the same way as others do. Before adderall , I was failing school, because of lack of concentration and not being able to interpret what was just read in class without it leaving my head almost instantly. With it, I can do tasks , complete homework, and be able to do what I need to do in order to forward my career.

[alicia1986]

I agree with most of these responses that adderall does not change the person you r, but it helps the person that you r without it focus and achieve in life for you r at an disadvantage without it. I would think of it as everybody that doesn't have add/adhd already has this drug in their systems naturally produced from them, and you,me and others that do have add/adhd dont so we need this pill that gives us that ability to do good and achieve in life. Just like people who take vitamins for lack of them and you don't...I hope this helps you over come your doubts in yourself that you didn't work that hard when you did...

[kptclutch]

Thanks for your replies....it's the strangest thing. To hate something that helps me so much.

I forgot to take it this morning and didn't realize it until two hours into my day....but I did realize my lack of drive and attention. When I was driving back home to take it (I'm a dedicated addict) my mouth was literally hanging open a bit because I was so distant.

I really hate to be a downer and be complaining, but I really want to know its me in here and I'm not some puppet. Feelings from this morning suggest I'm nothing without the med, but now I'm back in awesome mode since I've had it.

Am I really gonna be tethered to this pill for the rest of my days?

Thanks again for your replies and sorry for complaining so much.