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  #1  
Old Jul 28, 2013, 09:26 PM
D157R4C73D D157R4C73D is offline
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My biggest problem is a lack of motivation. I have certain skills I acquired about a decade ago that could be used to earn a living, but I haven't used them since. Every time I try to get back into relearning them I always fall back into the same patterns. I put off or completely avoid the difficult stuff for the easy dopamine fix.

So, I'm wondering where to find some motivation and a little resolve to do what I have to do. Is this a problem anyone else here shares? What do you do when you need to motivate yourself?
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  #2  
Old Jul 29, 2013, 04:36 PM
gordman gordman is offline
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Motivation is a very tough issue for myself and maybe all ADD people. Sometimes or maybe all of the time it takes a crisis situation for me to be able to take action. Like for my wife and myself we need to address our financial problems now by consolidating our huge debt from our house and redo our mortgage, for the 4th time. We need to control spending but also probably move to a smaller place. Anyways I wanted to make the point that the only time I get motivated is in a crisis. Take care.
  #3  
Old Jul 29, 2013, 06:28 PM
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SunnySky SunnySky is offline
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That's a tough one, darlin'. Are you on any meds? Should you be? I'm a newbie here, but understand what you mean about motivation. I read something from Dr Amen's site. Let me find it for you....

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  #4  
Old Jul 29, 2013, 06:34 PM
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SunnySky SunnySky is offline
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One Page Miracle:

http://www.danielplan.com/healthyhabits/loveyourself/


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  #5  
Old Jul 29, 2013, 07:16 PM
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SunnySky SunnySky is offline
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Here is the short form ( I sent to DD last week):

THE ONE PAGE MIRACLE

From Change Your Brain, Change Your Body, by Dr. Daniel Amen, Three Rivers Press, 2010

On a piece of paper, write down the specific goals you have for your life, including:

Your health
Your relationships
Your work
Your money

Take your time with this exercise . . . jot down ideas and goals as they come to you . . . . take your first draft and put it somewhere you're sure to see it every day.

Then ask yourself, does my behavior get me what I want—

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Thanks for this!
Onward2wards
  #6  
Old Jul 29, 2013, 07:49 PM
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Cenzia Cenzia is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by D157R4C73D View Post
My biggest problem is a lack of motivation. I have certain skills I acquired about a decade ago that could be used to earn a living, but I haven't used them since. Every time I try to get back into relearning them I always fall back into the same patterns. I put off or completely avoid the difficult stuff for the easy dopamine fix.

So, I'm wondering where to find some motivation and a little resolve to do what I have to do. Is this a problem anyone else here shares? What do you do when you need to motivate yourself?
I use audiobooks so I can "read" books. I watch short TV shows.
  #7  
Old Jul 30, 2013, 12:22 AM
D157R4C73D D157R4C73D is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by SunnySky View Post
One Page Miracle:

The Daniel Plan - Love Others By Loving Yourself


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Although I appreciate the thought, I'm pretty firmly in the atheist camp at this point. Anything religiously oriented isn't going to do much for me.
  #8  
Old Jul 30, 2013, 07:36 AM
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Fine, take out the 'God' part, but don't throw out the baby with the bath water. This gives a framework to match your behaviors according to what you want, but first you need to know what you want. Don't let life just happen. It will pass you by before you know it. Don't let your lack of faith take advantage of educated and wise teaching/guidance.

Last edited by SunnySky; Jul 30, 2013 at 08:05 AM.
  #9  
Old Jul 30, 2013, 07:40 AM
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SunnySky SunnySky is offline
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This other post must have been missed as I don't see God or religion mentioned here:

Here is the short form ( I sent to DD last week):

THE ONE PAGE MIRACLE

From Change Your Brain, Change Your Body, by Dr. Daniel Amen, Three Rivers Press, 2010

On a piece of paper, write down the specific goals you have for your life, including:

Your health
Your relationships
Your work
Your money

Take your time with this exercise . . . jot down ideas and goals as they come to you . . . . take your first draft and put it somewhere you're sure to see it every day.

Then ask yourself, does my behavior get me what I want—



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  #10  
Old Jul 30, 2013, 08:02 AM
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SunnySky SunnySky is offline
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Through an online training opportunity at work, I get access to various books, videos, etc., and came across this one that I'm attempting to complete, 52 Essential Habits for Success by Robert Stevenson. The idea is to read each day for a week the same habit, skip by the end of 52 weeks, you've gone through all 52 and focus on each one. I'm only on #2 so far.
==========================

Habit #1: Believe in Yourself. If you don’t believe in yourself, why should anyone else believe in you? People want to be around confident people. One of the most important traits of leaders is the confidence in themselves. People don’t want to follow someone who lacks self-confidence. When you first start out, you may have to “fake it before you make it.” None of us were born with all the knowledge, experience and talents we would need to be successful. These are all developed skills. So relax and learn from your mistakes, realizing we have all passed this way before.  7/22/2013 – 7/28/2013  

Habit #2: Act as if the World Is Watching. Thomas Jefferson said, “Whenever you are to do a thing, though it can never be known but to yourself, ask yourself how you would act were the world looking at you, and act accordingly.” Even though that was said more than 200 years ago, it is still great advice for today, especially in this technological world with people carrying mini-video recorders in their cellphones. The next thing you know, your actions are being shown on national TV or on the Internet for all the world to see. So act as if there is a camera on you at all times and act accordingly.  7/29/2013 – 8/4/2013

Next week:

Habit #3: Practice, Drill and Rehearse, Then Take the Initiative. If you want to beat your competition, then you have to be willing to put in the time to practice, drill and rehearse (PDR). The great ones don’t need someone telling them to practice. They understand when they are not practicing, someone else is, and when they meet that person on the field of competition, that person will win. Success comes to those who take the initiative to do more, stay longer and work harder. The day you understand your success is dependent on you — your own desire, initiative and fortitude — is the day you start achieving greatness. To the great ones, PDR is not a motto on some wall, it is a way of life. Simply stated:If you want to be the best at what you do, then practice more than the rest and success will come to you.

Last edited by SunnySky; Jul 30, 2013 at 08:23 AM.
  #11  
Old Jul 30, 2013, 08:35 AM
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SunnySky SunnySky is offline
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Originally Posted by Cenzia View Post
I use audiobooks so I can "read" books. I watch short TV shows.
I don't usually listen well, but find when I do force myself to listen, I'm improving my listening skills. At least that is my attempt, and just thought I learned better by actually reading and not listening. Maybe reading gives more control to skip areas or it's faster? IDK. Boy, we are a complicated lot! Even when we occasionally listen to Prairie Home Companion on NPR/public radio.... I've always felt that way...that listening skills are improved. Guess I knew I had focus issues before I knew I had focus issues. Lol. Not diagnosed ADD, but highly suspect it.
  #12  
Old Aug 18, 2013, 07:21 PM
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Went to psych office late afternoon on Friday for an eval.... awaiting insurance to approve Vyvanse (ha! Since I'm over 18 yo).
  #13  
Old Aug 18, 2013, 08:55 PM
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Maus5321 Maus5321 is offline
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Originally Posted by SunnySky View Post
Went to psych office late afternoon on Friday for an eval.... awaiting insurance to approve Vyvanse (ha! Since I'm over 18 yo).
Good for you hope it helps. And yes we are a confusing lot. It is a life long battle now from here on out! But got to do it. Things can and do change
  #14  
Old Aug 19, 2013, 05:37 PM
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psychmajortwenty2 psychmajortwenty2 is offline
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I need help with this too. I've gotten through my entire school career by putting things off to the last minute.. and only (like someone mentioned previously) did I get to doing and completing assignments/studying for tests in "crisis mode" a.k.a. the night before.

I miraculously managed to survive and do well right up until I had to complete my thesis for my undergrad. A project which, sadly, you cannot do in one night.

So I'm trying to figure out how to motivate myself to work more consistently on this too. I kind of feel defeated because I've never been able to do something like that before... but as they say "if you want something you've never had, you'll have to do something you've never done".

Not much help.. but... I hope someone else who has some kind of advice can reply to this thread so I can find this out too!
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  #15  
Old Aug 20, 2013, 05:52 PM
aidan1970 aidan1970 is offline
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Your post stated exactly what I struggle with-it is SO frustrating and overwhelming to me. I am intelligent and creative but my lack of motivation and initiation keep me incredibly stuck.
Thanks for this!
psychmajortwenty2
  #16  
Old Aug 20, 2013, 06:00 PM
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oil_and_water oil_and_water is offline
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Good habit building and repetition have been the best thing to help me so far. I find that "motivation" might not be the problem, but rather my inability to remember why I was on a task to begin with. I still struggle quite a lot, but writing notes and setting alarms with written reminders has improved my focus and given me a kick in the rear every now and then.
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  #17  
Old Aug 20, 2013, 07:51 PM
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SunnySky SunnySky is offline
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Originally Posted by aidan1970 View Post
Your post stated exactly what I struggle with-it is SO frustrating and overwhelming to me. I am intelligent and creative but my lack of motivation and initiation keep me incredibly stuck.
I resemble this remark.
  #18  
Old Aug 20, 2013, 07:56 PM
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Originally Posted by oil_and_water View Post
Good habit building and repetition have been the best thing to help me so far. I find that "motivation" might not be the problem, but rather my inability to remember why I was on a task to begin with. I still struggle quite a lot, but writing notes and setting alarms with written reminders has improved my focus and given me a kick in the rear every now and then.
This resembles my husband (with the habits/routines), but lately he's been forgetting things. I suggested he see someone. I did late Friday afternoon and (still) waiting for the over-ride approval for Vyvanse.
  #19  
Old Aug 24, 2013, 05:32 AM
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Doing a reward system helps with motivation. If I do one of the tasks on my list I get to have a chocolate doughnut or whatever snack I bought for that week. It works pretty well so far and my family helps motivate me too.
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  #20  
Old Aug 24, 2013, 08:25 AM
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I'm not a candidate for food rewards to motivate me..... It would have to be something else.
  #21  
Old Aug 24, 2013, 04:23 PM
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psychmajortwenty2 psychmajortwenty2 is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by oil_and_water View Post
Good habit building and repetition have been the best thing to help me so far. I find that "motivation" might not be the problem, but rather my inability to remember why I was on a task to begin with. I still struggle quite a lot, but writing notes and setting alarms with written reminders has improved my focus and given me a kick in the rear every now and then.
How do you remember to write the reminders, set the alarms, and everything?
I struggle with that. I know it's a good idea... but there's a large part of me that wins over by saying you need a reminder?? You don't need a reminder! You need a swift kick in the pants! You should remember this on your own. And then of course, in the process of all of this thinking.. I forget to do it.

And I have anxiety about writing lists and reminders to myself. I have no idea where this comes from. It's like... I know I should make a list.. but I have anxiety about making the list. Maybe I'm afraid I won't accomplish everything on the list I set out to do? I'm a bit of a perfectionist...

*sigh*
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Power resides where men believe it resides. No more and no less. - Game of Thrones

Better to be slapped with the truth than kissed with a lie. - Russian Proverb

  #22  
Old Aug 26, 2013, 03:06 AM
Hintkin Hintkin is offline
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I get my motivation from Albert Einstein's quotes and my failures in life. I keep myself busy with jogging and interacting with different people. I day dream a lot before I get to sleep so I can remind myself of my goals in life. Just remember to whom are you doing this for. Hope this helps you

One more thing, what I do to keep me more motivated, I study different subject that has nothing to do with my main course. I'm reading about psychology, arts, literature, philosophy and food. That is to make my life interesting. You should try it, too just remember to avoid taking everything all at once. Just study one or two different subject. Don't force yourself to focus to only one subject.

Last edited by Hintkin; Aug 26, 2013 at 03:11 AM. Reason: Just to add up something
  #23  
Old Aug 27, 2013, 01:10 AM
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@psychmajor I usually write a reminder on my phone as soon as I possibly can. I don't allow time for speculation on the matter. This way, I don't have the time to put off or forget, as it is saved in my phone and will alert me in the near future.
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The last temptation is the greatest treason: to do the right deed for the wrong reason. - T. S. Eliot
Thanks for this!
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  #24  
Old Aug 27, 2013, 09:44 AM
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I majored in Consumer and Family Affairs in college, until my last year when i had to quit after an accident and concussion. what i would like to do is get a General Studies degree as that is all i probably could do now. i only need 2 classes to graduate but my mind can't handle the studies anymore. i used to love school, actually went back online and got an associates in arts.
  #25  
Old Aug 27, 2013, 02:43 PM
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I use the scatter-shot approach? Sometimes I'll just do whatever it is I think of. If I make the mistake of thinking about it (writing papers) I work on it for at least a few minutes and then see where I am; sometimes I get lucky and I'm well engaged and can continue, other times I'm thoroughly stressed and overwhelmed/anxious and will jump at the chance to do something else.

When I'm making excuses to myself why I should play the 24th game of Solitaire in a row, I realize that gig is up and I need to switch again to something more productive. I was playing Mafia Wars on Facebook full-time a few years ago and suddenly realized it wasn't really what I wanted, wasn't getting me anywhere so I deleted about 950 of my 1000 "friends" and wrote a Facebook PM to the rest (real friends and family) telling them I would not be on Facebook much anymore and I went to a different social site I liked that was focused on health and got back to working with it instead.

Notice your own patterns? I figured out long ago that I tend to eventually buy what I want, no matter what my money situation? Back then I would lie, cheat, and steal to get a book, even if I had to go hungry. Now I treat my time and what I do like that; you're going to do what you want to do! Try to figure that out better and help yourself rather than fight yourself? If you want a degree or want to take a certain course or get a certain job you can, but you do have to want that and not just because it looks good or your mother would be proud :-)

If you have difficulty with a task, get your imagination in gear and turn the world on its head. Did you read the Harry Potter books at all? In the first one, the kids had to write a paper that was 4 feet long (instead of "500 words") and Ron was wailing his was only 3-1/2 yet. When I was 6 or so I use to climb up on top of my dresser and look at my room/the world that way :-) Figure out a way to engage with a task so you can work on it more easily. We all have our individual tastes, skills, etc. so figure out what works for you and to heck with how you are "supposed" to do things! I had to write and rewrite a paper 3-4 times and got thoroughly sick of it so the last time I spent an entire weekend on my bed and wrote it entirely in verse! The "challenge" of it kept me at it and the fact that it was unique and I was proud of my ability to even attempt such a thing. And, you can bet the points I had to make in verse stayed in my head so they were easier for me to remember for the final exam, too.

Your life is all for you, there's no one else in it? Figure out what works for you and to heck what works for someone else or what someone else thinks you should do?
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Thanks for this!
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