[Leonodas]

I don't know. I don't want to have either, but it seems like it's possible at this point.

For years, I've always forgotten little things -- boring, unstimulating, all that. Right now, I struggle a lot with chores and homework.

I've never been a bad student, which is why no one has taken notice, I believe. I think I can attribute every bad grade I've ever gotten to not turning in homework/studying, mostly the former. It's been like this for as long as I can remember, but since you really don't get homework until fifth grade, of course that was when the real problems came up. All before that, I would forget things a lot, not do things on time, etc., but I never connected the dots until now.

I zone out quite a bit. Notes? Give me 10 minutes and I'll drift off into another daydream (something I do all the time; I've come up with novel worthy stories this way, and I continue to live them out every day ). Tests/quizzes? My biggest problem is getting distracted by said daydreams and thoughts.

I've been having trouble simply doing chores since the day I started doing them. Simple things, not just chores but everything -- forgetting, ignoring, procrastinating... I hate it, but I don't have any idea why I would be doing it. I'm trying, trying so hard to fight it, but I always fail, one way or another.

I used to be sensitive. Very sensitive, to the point where I earned my NJROTC nickname "sensitive flower". Don't worry, I don't get bullied or anything now, that was years ago. Now, I'm not sensitive at all, but I certainly feel the pain on the inside; it's more about control. I don't know if that has anything to do with it.

I took the ADD/ADHD test on these forums. I scored a 38, most of it in the inattentive range, but still moderate in hyperactivity.

I always like to be doing something, you see. I'll tap my foot, move my leg, anything that breaks the motionlessness of the moment. I want to do things that are crazy (no, not drugs, I've never done anything illegal like that), out of the box, stimulating to my mind and emotions. I want difference. Change. Do the same thing over and over and I'm liable to get bored and frustrated.

There's tons more I could tell you, so ask if you feel something is pertinent.

Obviously, it is very easy to self-diagnose. I don't want to do that; I'd rather err the on side of caution than just flat-out say that I've got some disorder. It's just that the signs are there. I always want to improve, and since my problems with focus and productivity are my weakest points in my life at the moment, I will deal with them any way possible -- and if it happens to be ADD, at least I'll be informed and will be able to get treated so as to fix the problem.

Problem: My parents won't have anything like it. They won't listen, especially not my stepmother -- it is apparent that she has a condition similar to borderline personality disorder due to her upbringing, and if it doesn't fit her "view" of how things ought to be, it's not true.

I want to find out for myself, but since my parents aren't compliant, what should I do? I just want to know. I not looking for victim-hood, it's just that the first step towards a solution is understanding the problem.

[anneo59]

Do you have another relative or school counselor who is supportive, with whom you could speak about this. Like you say, you don't want to self-diagnose or be a victim, and it's tough when you're in conflict with your parents. Also, there's info and support here on PC for the disorder. I encourage you to seek it out and wish you well with it!!!!

[Miswimmy1]

it definitely sounds like u could be suffering from something here, although whether or not it is ADHD is really up to a professional to diagnose. Are you getting enough sleep? Eating ok? Exercising? All of those can play a role in level of focus and the ability to pay attention. I'm not saying that you don't have anything, I'm just giving you some things to consider.

As the above poster said, you should try and see if there is a learning specialist or a counselor at your school who could advocate for you. Just because you don't have bad grades doesn't mean that you don't have anything going on. I know personally, I sailed through school and got good grades without even trying. I found ways to get around my procrastination and my lack of motivation. So its definitely possible to get by with ADHD and not have it show up on a report card.

[Leonodas]

I would go to my guidance counselor, but I don't know. That's awkward. What do I say? I mean, I only have 15 minutes and I can't imagine her dealing with some kid's personal problems -- I was under the impression that guidance counselors were there for school-related (ie grade, performance, trouble, etc) issues. I don't know how she'd react if I just came in and laid out my concerns -- I mean, either she wouldn't understand what I was getting at or would understand completely, perhaps reading into it and dismissing it as nonsense.

But I think I'll go to the other counselor -- she's in charge of us Mentors (we help transition freshmen) and I definitely have more of a connection with her. Or this other lady I know, not sure if shes' a counselor but she could be of assistance...

I just hate my parents for disregarding everything. I try to reach out and they turn everything around on me. "Well you SHOULD HAVE done such and such" or some other condescension which serves only to erode my trust in them. I once attempted to confide in them (this was rather recently actually), as they were upset that I had yet again forgotten to do one of my chores. It was already on top of dealing with a power-hungry and destructive leadership in my NJROTC, as well as my heavy course load, as I explained to them. And my stepmother said "I'm glad you're feeling the agony. You deserve it".

I'll try to reach out to someone, but my parents are more of a wall than anything.

I would say that I have been monitoring physiological irregularities for a while, since that's always been my "first base" diagnosis for any and all ailments. I sleep rather well with only a few off days on occasion, I eat...good enough. Wish there was more healthy food readily available -- not to say that we eat like crap, I just happen to eat up all the healthy stuff and get left with crap sometimes. Regardless, I don't think it's an issue. My only concern is water intake, but even there I think I have that under control. Some days I am unable to get adequate water, but I've established something of a routine for water consumption so it's all good.


Question: If it does happen that I have AD(H)D, then what happens? I can't really be on medication as a requirement for the Navy; would there be expensive treatment? If I do have to take medication, is it one of those things which creates a gradual adjustment until I am "weaned" off it?

I did forget to mention, I do have 6 AP classes this year in addition to NJROTC and NHS eating up all my time, so stress plays a part now. However, I wouldn't say that my course load has been particularly difficult in the past; it's just that now there is no room for my recurring problems, so I want to get it out of the way as soon as possible so this year goes better.

[Arwen_78]

Wow, just sort of breezing through your post you sound like me! I am ADD, I can manage without medicates but it's from years of working on it. I was medicated as a kid/teenager and it didn't really help. A lot of it was due to me not really caring about school, which I do now but still fight all these things. I'm not going to say much more as I haven't really read through all of this thread.

I just wanted to tell you I think I know where you are. I want to help if I can. Keep you head up.

[Arwen_78]

I wasn't as active in school as you, wow I wish I could have been. Anyways, it might not be ADD/ADHA or maybe it is. Maybe you just have no time to take time for yourself and need it. I went through something like that a year ago.

As for medication, I'm sorry but it's not like you take these a few times a day for a few months and your cured! It would be an on going thing. They would first put you on some medication and play with the dose till they find what works for you. If they think you can manage without medication they might just have you speak with a doctor about how to held stress better or just everyday to day living and how you handle it. They give you tips on how you could make it better. Sometimes you just need someone to listen and understand.

I think your parents just want the best for you not what "IS" best for you... I don't know.

[Miswimmy1]

There are ways to learn coping skills that don't involve medication. And even if you do go on medication at some point, its not the fix all- make everything better sort of thing. It can help, but you still need to learn the skills. I suggest beginning with an ADHD coach. Those can get pricey, but definately talk to the learning specialist or something. I work with mine to help keep things organized and all that and she has been wonderful.

[bluebird2]

You sound like you have some symptoms of ADHD. If I were you, I'd consider seeing a professional and getting evaluated - if it's causing you issues. ADHD can cause many issues in life, especially as you get older, and the sooner you know about it, the better.

Cheers!

[lostincornflakes]

A few months ago my 24 year old daughter was diagnosis with ADHD. After reading about it here it made a lot of sense. And it also was me without a doubt. From my teen years til now I was always talking, really fast, interrupting conversions cause I just couldn't wait. Not paying attention or listening completely when being talked too. I always try to finish others questions before them. Starting projects, procrastinating and more. So I decided to take the quiz on here and I scored 43. I'm going to talk to my pdoc on Thursday about it.