[sapphire_aria]

I am so tired of feeling like Dr. Jekyl and Mr. Hyde. I want to clean my apartment and study for my classes, so I can finally finish university (it has been 15 years) but I can't focus, can't get anything done at home. I get overwhelmed and then watch tv or play games to try to put me in a better mood but I never end up doing anything I need to do. I have a knee injury that is getting worse because I never exercise, I'm stuck on strong anti-inflammatory medicine.
I keep fighting with my boyfriend, telling him I need his help to get stuff done, I know it is a lot to ask but he has a disability and I help him with things that are not "my" job. But he has trouble getting things done too, he won't even just suggest I try to read a little. Reading out loud to another person helps me focus but when he has a day off work he just wants to go out and have fun, not suggest I do some reading/studying first.

I am working part time and my boss is very happy with my work, and wants me to leave school and work full time. I want to finish school so much, but it seems impossible and like I am getting all this pressure to give up or just a lack of support to keep going. I am waiting to see if I can get funding from school for an ADD coach, but last time I used one it only helped a little. I honestly just hate myself right now. I seem to be able to do what other people want, it creates structure and motivation to know my boss expects something of me and is watching to make sure I do it, but it's too hard to do anything for myself. Being in class actually makes me very happy, I love learning, and this week I was so depressed that I stayed up all night crying, slept all day and missed my classes and then went to work in the evening.

[Agent Misty]

Well, it would be nice if he told you to read/study if being told to do something helps you. To be honest though, if you know you struggle getting things done without coaching or help, you need to work on that first as best you can instead of shifting the issue and trying to work on him.

If you do your job well and your boss is impressed it definitely shows youve got that potential!

[Tashu]

Hi sapphire_aria,

I used to suffer from similar procrastination problem and was not able to complete my projects in time. The procrastination was mainly the result of multiple mental health problems ( Depression, ADD, COD etc.) that I have been suffering from since 1992.

I got rid of this problem once my mental health issues were cured by a successful treatment that included medication, therapy, healthy lifestyle and self-help.

Have you ever discussed your issues with a psychiatrist? For ADD, I was given Strattera & Wellbutrin and they worked well. Strattera is a non-stimulant medication for ADD. Wellbutrin is a Dopamine & norepinephrine inhibitor.

You can also ask your psychiatrist if Modafinil will be good for you. I take 100 mg Modafinil on days when the workload is too much or the deadline is too close. It's a non-stimulant, non-addictive off label medication for ADD and starts working within 30 minutes. It gives a good concentration for about 8 hours.

Hope it helps.
Thanks,
Tashu