Why can't I just be normal?

I am so sick of not being able to pick up on other peoples cues. And I'm sick of being the burden because they have to stop and rearrange their thoughts just so I get the concept. I'm sick of being taken advantage of by scarcasm. I'm sick of looking like an idiot. I just want to be like everybody else and be able to understand the unspoken. I hate being me when I can't see the whole picture. I just want to dissapear so I can stop hurting all the people who try to get close to me... 'cause thats all I'm ever gonna do....

My experience with communication:

Interpreting basic emotions (happy, sad, etc...) are fine. The subtle cues irritate me and raise my anxiety, so I rely heavily on verbal communication. When, I am talking with someone, I compensate for my difficulties by asking direct questions about their feelings and wants.

Reading about body language and facial expression has helped, but I still struggle. Slowly, I am improving, but I will probably never master it. I do try to look at people's faces, when I talk and use the knowledge, I have gained from reading to try and pick up on their subtle nonverbal messages.

Language with a lot of metaphors, and idioms challenge me. Eg. Clouds with silver linings. Clouds are not hollow and silver, so how can they have a silver lining? Literal me!

Thinking literally can make life more difficult.

Is this what you are referring to?

Yes. Minus the metaphores (when they're written, anyway. One of my werid strengths). I like the tip of asking direct questions, though. I guess all I can do is try, huh? And practice..