I have been thought to have PDD-NOS since 1987 & AS since 1996. I feel I am ready to be in a relationship, but I'm afraid I don't have enough to offer in a relationship. Another person gave me this idea with the lecture he/she wrote here:

The Childfree Life • View topic - considering returning to Catholicism (LONG!)

After the discussion with that other person, I have had a lot of distress all afternoon. My headache still is not gone, so obviously my blood pressure is still up. I will relax when I can. I cannot calm down on another's whim. Every upset has to run its course.

I have a long history of being deemed unemployable by vocational rehabilitation agencies like Goodwill. Currently, Goodwill is forcing me to wait until SCCO has done my visual evoked potentials test. SCCO keeps on delaying the test, so I'm screwed until Goodwill wants to let me in. Even then, I cannot guarantee that I'll ever have a job. If I manage to get one, I will only make minimum wage, bringing the total of my reduced disability checks plus earned income to around $1,100/month. Paying over $700/month for rent plus electricity certainly won't leave me with enough for entertainment. I certainly won't be able to fulfill the demands of a lady who demands her prospective partner have both a job AND a car. I found several like that on dating sites. Before recommending volunteering, please read what I said about that on the abovementioned page.

All the reading school would require would be way too much stress because I am only minimally literate. There are too many words for me to miss in all those walls of text in college textbooks. My Deaf Studies Certificate from Cincinnati State College does not entitle me to any certain kind of job, therefore it doesn't even count. But I will NEVER go back to college.

All my blood relatives live back east. I come from a very dysfunctional family that is not worth living near.

Everyone I try to meet seems alienated by the facts that I have no family here, am not in school, and lack of employment. I know I must be not-more-than-friends before trying to get intimate. But I miss cuddling. I even got sterilized & confirmed sterile cuz I NEVER want children, NEVER even just one.

[manwithnofriends]

What EXACTLY do you wish for us readers to do? sympathise? I have never heard of anyone more disadvantaged than you tbh. I'm sure this situation is not one you want to be in. Btw, if you really want someone else in your life who is willing to understand you make sure you understand them... and from what you've just posted, you're clearly not ready to do that.

I just want someone to tell me how to successfully make friends and fall in love with no job, no school, and no family. If you can't do that, someone else must. Thanks a lot for reminding me of how much I really deserve to be this disadvantaged.

[The_little_didgee]

The way we view the world influences how we relate to others. e.g. If one thinks everybody is out to get them, then every interaction will have that element to it, even though the other person has no intention of causing harm.

It appears you gave up on yourself and employment.

What do you mean minimally literate? I don't get it. Did you dictate your post?

Originally Posted by The_little_didgee

The way we view the world influences how we relate to others. e.g. If one thinks everybody is out to get them, then every interaction will have that element to it, even though the other person has no intention of causing harm.

It appears you gave up on yourself and employment.

What do you mean minimally literate? I don't get it. Did you dictate your post?

I just cannot process every word I see. I get the gist but I don't fully understand after reading more than a paragraph. And, "What do you mean" questions always worsen my confusion.

I have not given up on myself. Employers just put everyone through an increasingly difficult social skills test that I keep failing.

[The_little_didgee]

What do you really want out of life? Your original post did not make a lot of sense. Can you clarify exactly what you need help with?

What kind of job do you want that is suitable for your personality? Perhaps, you are getting jobs that are not appropriate for you. Why apply for and accept a sales job if you are quiet and not able to converse with others?

Define "minimal illiterate" was what I meant. To me that means writing and reading at a grade one or two level. Obviously your interpretation is different. I asked because your writing is at a much higher level.

[Maxima]

I'm having very similar struggles. I wish I could offer you advice, but unfortunately I do not know how to do those things for myself. I hope things well start to turn for the better soon.

I am just lovesick. In September of 2009 I got to cuddle with a lady four times. Then I got just one cuddle from another lady in July of 2011.

I think I've made some progress towards a turning point. The mental health counselor I was seeing left the state & will be gone for a full month. I stopped @ his office and asked for a different counselor. They're in the process of matching me with a new counselor. They even agreed that I need social skills training. Nobody has made any attempt to give me any social skills training in almost TWENTY YEARS.

[priva]

Lots of places (Urban Ministry, etc.) offer reading lessons. Have you looked for those?
Temple Grandin has written some very good books on social skills that I wish I had read when I was younger. Those are probably in your local library. It's great that you are getting social skills training.

[hope4all2]

First, you write very well, so you are likely more literate than you realize. Next take steps to be the best person you can be. Volunteer, help others, with things you have an interest in. This will help you to meet people with similar interests. Be humble. Don't take offense or get defensive if someone respectfully give you constructive criticism, but instead thank them. Associate & socialize with people you admire & think highly of. Learn from them, study them, & ask them for guidance. Don't have anything to do with people that do not have integrity. Don't get angry or say anything to them, just have nothing to do with them. Listen & try to understand those you admire. If you are not clear about something they communicate, ask them to explain in more detail, & thank them. Be grateful for what you have. Be positive, be a glass half full kind of person. Smile & appear happy even if you are not feeling that way inside. People like to be around happy positive people not negative people, so express joy even when you don't feel joy.