Struggling with Relationships!!

Ok so my thing is how do you get another to realize how they affect you? because from my own experience & as most well know you can't argue with anyone & expect to get anywhere! But at the same time i can't get anywhere with kindness & calmness either! So what is a gal with Aspergers to do? Especially if the other person is quick thinking & can out smart the Aspie!! You add all this together with the two people being married & have a child..... not a great thing!! We love one another alot but Love is not enough, & i don't want to escape from him by any means! I just want certain things to be altered some! Like more respect shown!!!! I do not believe that is alot to ask for!!! & since i vowed to be his forever & i've already given him 13 yrs. then the least he can do is work on the things he does that are disrespectful to me!! I would do it for him, i mean obviously there are certain things people just can't change but what i am asking is not like that! I told him this evening that i wish we could switch places for like a week & then he could finally understand!!!!!!!!!!! What am i to do??????????????????????
Any advice would be greatly appreciated!!!

...you have to see it from his point of view as well...

Well see here is the thing... i have!! & that's why it is harder to handle because he won't do the same! I know him inside & out, i've made it a point to!

I've never managed to maintain a relationship so I'm probably not in a good place to give advice. Though I would say, it's not really just an aspergers issue, if he doesn't respect you then that's a fundamental issue that needs addressed I would think?