[sadness777]

i can't interactive to every member in my family long time, i can't explain about my language to let them understanding my explain, when trouble comes so they misunderstood about my words,and we have an argue because they don't undertsand me or listening to me ,and my father said i have to stop saying, if not he will hit my head to kill me I want they know to understand to help me ,but all result is worst.My mom said she can't close to me cause she explain to me,i don't understand what she means, i feel complicative. I feel sad cause i can't explain my word to let them understand. it really hard to explain my words to them, my feeling is mix , and my language is mix too , i can't interactive to social,it really hard for me to communica to anyone , when i speak to them,they always misunderstood my words and feel bore , that is why it really hard taht i can't ahve relationship to anyone femal or male at 32 years old . so i can't go to work ,I remember that i have that sytom when i was a baby , i sit on my father thick , and hit my head to his check several time , when i grow up at first grade , i can't study, i can't know the alphalbell so i can't pass class so my parents have to move me to new place to study, at that time no one know about autisum in VN, my parents feel strange when i have act strange ,at that time my family is poor,they open a cafe house, they work very hard to earn money to take care for family,so they don't care much about me . But luckily , we found a new teacher she helped me about the alpheall , but i can't read or write ,it takes long time to read and write then i miss points cause i can't do math well , and one of my classmate hate me, she told to my father that i not do homework so my father asked me knee on the woodbed and use the bell trict me i got black and purple in leg,i don;t know what happen why i got purnish , i don't know how to explian to him ,after that my teacher come to my house and explain it to my parents .
I have been has nighmare about it until i grow up . I can't pass the class so my parents give them money but it to help me got pass class if i study again, they have to pay more money , so they do that,i know this when i grow up ,my awareness is low ,i don't know that is wrong, it takes me too long to understand that is wrong about few weeks or few years .but the normal is know that is wrong at now.So it really hard for me when i at the age of study, when i wsa in second grade, i can't forcus to teacher, teacher in second grade clamped my nose an clapped to my face several time then, my parents move me to new school, i always miss class my parents do the same way and they alway compare me with my sister that i study worse than my sister until at eight grade i can't study at morning class ,my parents is tired and they don't pay money to teacher anymore ,so they move me to class in the evening , i only study untill 10 grade, i can't pass ten grade , i feel sad when i sad to my parents they don't want to understand me have autisum, cause my sister adult is normal , she is beautyfull and have success mariage over ten years , she ahve been pass university ,so they don't think i have ..... they said i only stupid not autisum, they think they don't let me go to work that why i am stupid, my mom said i need stay home to take care my father and wait until he died she let me get marriage to anyone, i said that i have that i can't interactive so i won't get marriage to anyone ,you see i write english good that is i have limited about study,i try my best about write , listening, speaking, but my brain is mix ,so i can't do father,i only write, but other i can't do, My parents always compare me to my sister that she is beautifull , have pass university, and i don't have, even they agree to people outside my family that when they said i not beautiful and low education, i got depress too , what do i do now, when i told to my parents please don't compare me and when they are upset not please about her cause my sister do something wrong, they don't tell to my sister direct, they pour all sister's fault and all negative word of her to me,and i sad please tell to my sister direct, they do not do it , they all blame to me, and tehy allawys criticize ,they not teach me , when they upset about my sister all words instead tell her direct ,they do not all thing they pour to me ,my father used to said to my mom that don't make my sister get stress ,if she do that my sister run away with no information cause she lives in America,but my sister out of her control ,i live in Vn, and they think i am in their control , so anytime they upset about my sister's fault ,they always pour all to my head for several years until i know that i have .. i ask to stop ..... , in fond of my sister's face they allways say good words even they got upset from my sister words but behind my sister all words of her they pour and upset to me ,i tell my sister the truth what my parents talk bad about her back, but my parents tell to her that i try to make them and my sister not get along and spread their relationship of parents and my sister and they criticize me , I always nervous and affraid that i make my family sad about me , i want they know clear about that to understand to help me, i feel hopeless,if someone they pass away i can manage to earn money ,cause i don't ahve job in Vn,if they pass away, i am too old to work ,my parent is now over 60 years old . My sister make paperwork for me in 2014,but 2018 i just know it, if nothing change i will come to America in 2025, but i worry if my parents too old how can i leave them to live there, my mom said she better died ,she don't want stay on bed when she get old ,she worry i upset when she lie on bed and i take care her everyday , i don't know why she said that,i would take care for her when she lie on bed and my sister when she know my situation, i tell her she she criticize that i shoul study english more and she said that i am normal, she said i am crazy, and she cut off contact email to me, i write email to her,she didn't reply. Why i have know this sytom that i feel i ahve strange action and communication , all of sytom if list on internet ,that i have, i used to bite my sister when i was 5 years old, i play alone when i am in school ,no one want to play with me, they saw i strange action, i some time hit my body or strach my face when i 16 years old even when i was young few years old i sometiem hit my body , but my parents don't now that,cause they was working , After i quit ten grade i study english for many years, i have limited so i only can write english in this way you see, but i can't communicate to another ,and i afraid to speak to another cause i afraid i don't understand me , and i ahve to explain,then they misunderstood , if they understand,they easy forgot if not they upset terrible like my father easy get upset and accept kill me even have God in his life , he will kill me if i try to saying , to explian to make him upset,when i explain sometime my brain is got mix i do something wrong, my mom blame that computer,she said i shoukd avoid to computer, but they don't let me go to outside i only go outside buy food in the morning, and other time, i ahve to come back house to stay there mamy time, after do house work i sit on computer to study and watch film to relax but my mom said i play game all time , she not beside me all time, sometime she come and watch what i do on computer,so she think i play game all time , i keep silence , i not explian ,if i explain she say i speak up story and tell to me that if i not keep silence she will tell my father taht i ahve action rude to them, so i keep silence , iam 32 not a baby anymore, i say to her, she not please about that ,i only ahve computer to become friend in four wall at my house

Sorry to let you guy misunderstood, i mean my father told me : you will be laught at your face to people who live in Vn, i mean people in Vn will laught at me if they listening what i communication to my father, cause my langue is mix and make understood to other, my father said this several time when i communica to him about toptic,i mean topic outside this fourm , but i forgot about topic, everytime i communica ( speak ) to him, when i said wrong sentence cause i got mix language and hard to explain so my father said that , noone here mean to me , i won't make you guy misunderstood, I add things to that in Vn nowaday have autisum for young and babe school ,in the past in 1988 or 1985 we not know about autiusm,but me not have center for people like us to join center at my age over 30 In Vn, so i luckiky than other that have house to live , this house my grandparent give to my parents over 60 years.

Thank for sharing information , your son is luckily , he has father understanding,as people like us ,we need understanding, trust, sympathic, and become friend to help us get overcome and improve... it is good for us in future, in my opinion that you should treatment for him soon, cause if not he will be like me mix language and have strange behavour .... and have repeat action to make people is upset like my father, my mom, my sister, if treatment right time he will be develope and improve skill to indepentdant when he is not have family beside someday, he live there so he have more chance to improve ..... and at his age easy to study , and easy get job for autisum over there , you can lead him and find his strong point to help him develope his career in future , all i tell you taht i learn on internet ,yes my mother think computer to study and play game is a problem to make me silly and stupid , yes she is right for some point but i stay at home, they afraid i go out to play or work ,i silly and someone will bulling me .

So they not aggree so i use computer to improve my english skill , but i have limit but i still try and i know my stiuation thank to internet, I need paretnt to tell which they not please about me direct ,but in this morning i went out buy food for my father cause he is blind , then i came to house , i mindless to hear that my parent talk back about me that she said she don't think i have..... she just think that i use computer and computer make me silly and stupid i clammped my ears, but it still hear,i wait they finish talking ,i won't to make anything is complicative , so i keep slience , then i go upstair to reactve is normal .

she not beside me when i at young , so she not saw all my strange behaviour ... and if she suddenly saw my strange behavoiur ,she thought i still a child ,and she worked to take care for family , so anything go on ..... in the past i feel upset in my heart cause i ahve strange behavour , and my language is have problem , i try to explain let them understand me which i want to say ,and they think i want agrue, i not want agrue, so i have repeat action sometime make them upset,As i said when i communicative to my father....i not upset which my father said.....

i feel upset about my strange behavoiour and i question to myself that why i have strange behavourr action ? why my language is mix can't explain to everyone make them undertsand me ....., then i find on internet,i ahve laptop in 2012,that is long story, but it is dramatic story like movie, but sad movie so i should not tell it in here and it list the sytom like i have mix language , hard to explain ,can't understand when people joke especially they said joke in language is compliactive but joke in simple i can understand , and speak a sentence have a sentence
implicit i can't understand etc .........

I have awareness low so when my sister did wrong something in the past in 2012,my parents said that she did wrong, and they ask me that did she do wrong ?, i keep silence cause i don't know that wrong or right , that is very bad, but i can't tell what it is,and after many years , my parent tell to me they think i
advocate her
advocate her in this time, i know know is wrong or right
, i don;t know taht is wrong ,but until in 2017 i awareness that is wrong ,so i talk to her,i tell parents, they say what do i want ? why i said that thing again ? they upset and will investigate and double that my sister ask me do said that to them, cause that problem in the past they double me and my sister, so very complicative .So i not talk about that to my parents but i tell to my sister so she was upset and said i not tired to said that thing again,again cause that thing is related to me and my parents.... so i stop to tell that to her, i mention that in present if something happend i don't know wrong or right, but it take me long time to understand depend the problem is complicative or simple take fews day or few weeks or few years... so when i awareness i speak out,so it make them upset and misundrerstood

Sorry to let you guy misunderstood, i mean my father told me : you will be laught at your face to people who live in Vn, i mean people in Vn will laught at me if they listening what i communication to my father, cause my langue is mix and make understood to other, my father said this several time when i communica to him about toptic,i mean topic outside this fourm , but i forgot about topic, everytime i communica ( speak ) to him, when i said wrong sentence cause i got mix language and hard to explain so my father said that , noone here mean to me , i won't make you guy misunderstood, I add things to that in Vn nowaday have autisum for young and babe school ,in the past in 1988 or 1985 we not know about autiusm,but me not have center for people like us to join center at my age over 30 In Vn, so i luckiky than other that have house to live , this house my grandparent give to my parents over 60 years.

i know people like us wanna understanding,as people like us ,we need understanding, trust, sympathic, and become friend to help us get overcome and improve... it is good for us in future, in my opinion that you should treatment for him soon, cause if not he will be like me mix language and have strange behavour .... and have repeat action to make people is upset like my father, my mom, my sister, if treatment right time he will be develope and improve skill to indepentdant when he is not have family beside someday, he live there so he have more chance to improve ..... and at his age easy to study , and easy get job for autisum over there , you can lead him and find his strong point to help him develope his career in future , all i tell you taht i learn on internet ,yes my mother think computer to study and play game is a problem to make me silly and stupid , yes she is right for some point but i stay at home, they afraid i go out to play or work ,i silly and someone will bulling me .

So they not aggree so i use computer to improve my english skill , but i have limit but i still try and i know my stiuation thank to internet, I need paretnt to tell which they not please about me direct ,but in this morning i went out buy food for my father cause he is blind , then i came to house , i mindless to hear that my parent talk back about me that she said she don't think i have..... she just think that i use computer and computer make me silly and stupid i clammped my ears, but it still hear,i wait they finish talking ,i won't to make anything is complicative , so i keep slience , then i go upstair to reactve is normal .

she not beside me when i at young , so she not saw all my strange behaviour ... and if she suddenly saw my strange behavoiur ,she thought i still a child ,and she worked to take care for family , so anything go on ..... in the past i feel upset in my heart cause i ahve strange behavour , and my language is have problem , i try to explain let them understand me which i want to say ,and they think i want agrue, i not want agrue, so i have repeat action sometime make them upset,As i said when i communicative to my father....i not upset which my father said.....

i feel upset about my strange behavoiour and i question to myself that why i have strange behavourr action ? why my language is mix can't explain to everyone make them undertsand me ....., then i find on internet,i ahve laptop in 2012,that is long story, but it is dramatic story like movie, but sad movie so i should not tell it in here and it list the sytom like i have mix language , hard to explain ,can't understand when people joke especially they said joke in language is compliactive but joke in simple i can understand , and speak a sentence have a sentence
implicit i can't understand etc .........

I have awareness low so when my sister did wrong something in the past in 2012,my parents said that she did wrong, and they ask me that did she do wrong ?, i keep silence cause i don't know that wrong or right , that is very bad, but i can't tell what it is,and after many years , my parent tell to me they think i
advocate her
advocate her in this time, i know know is wrong or right
, i don;t know taht is wrong ,but until in 2017 i awareness that is wrong ,so i talk to her,i tell parents, they say what do i want ? why i said that thing again ? they upset and will investigate and double that my sister ask me do said that to them, cause that problem in the past they double me and my sister, so very complicative .So i not talk about that to my parents but i tell to my sister so she was upset and said i not tired to said that thing again,again cause that thing is related to me and my parents.... so i stop to tell that to her, i mention that in present if something happend i don't know wrong or right, but it take me long time to understand depend the problem is complicative or simple take fews day or few weeks or few years... so when i awareness i speak out,so it make them upset and misundrerstood

[Skeezyks]

From what you wrote, it sounds like you are having a difficult time. I'm sorry I don't know what I would be able to offer in the way of helpful suggestions.

I would guess there's not much in the way of mental health services you can get in Vietnam. I think you mentioned your sister lives in America and you might have the chance to move to the U.S. in the future. If you did, then perhaps you could begin to get some of the help you did not get growing up.

I'm an older person myself... more your parents' ages. And there were no mental health services for me when I was young either. So I know something of what that is like. Hopefully being here on PsychCentral can be of some comfort and support though. Please keep posting.