[JonnSmith]

Even since I was a child I have exhibited some odd behaviors that I have never understood or been able to explain. But recently, I’ve been researching about autistic spectrum disorders and realized that a lot of the symptoms associated with it are ones that I feel/have. I even took an online autism quotient test and scored a 38. But I understand that this isn’t intended to be a diagnosis so I’ll instead list the reasons why I think I may have it.

-I am extremely shy and strongly dislike change. I remember when I was a toddler, I would get anxious to the point of crying whenever my parents would leave me somewhere I wasn’t familiar with. It got to the point where several of the babysitters I had flat out refused to babysit me after a while because I would cry almost the entire time.

-This got better when I was 4-5, but it hasn’t completely went away. I usually have to learn social skills that other people pick up naturally. I still get extremely anxious in social situations and I find myself having trouble expressing my thoughts into words or not knowing how to respond when people talk to me. Also I have a fear about being watched or being the center of attention in public; which is why I very anxious when people make eye contact with me for a long period of time, clap for me, or even sing happy birthday to me.

-I was thought to be intellectually gifted when I was in kindergarten. And although I wasn’t classified as a genius, I was still found to have above average intelligence. I recently tested myself and scored my IQ at 129.

-Although I’ve had a few friends when I was young, they were never really close and I would usually prefer to spend most of my time doing things such as playing video games, rather than socializing. This really hasn’t changed as I don’t really feel love or a sense of emotional closeness towards anybody in my life.

-Ever since I was a child, I have had countless obsessive interests that I would immerse myself in. While they have changed throughout the years, one that I have now is history. I usually spend hours and hours reading articles and watching YouTube videos about historical topics to the point where I can even give very detailed descriptions about those topics.

-I also occasionally develop very random and strange interests that I can’t explain. Some of these have included types of coffee makers and Wi-Fi routers.

-I have an unusual fascination with finding patterns. For example, let’s say I saw a random set of numbers on a license plate; I would try hard to find a way that the numbers connect by adding, dividing or multiplying by the same number. Or another things I would do is look at floor tiles to see if the colors go in a pattern in the same shape and size. I also get simulated by warm showers; I could honestly stay in a shower for about 30-45 minutes.

-I get attached to inanimate objects; usually balls or rubber bands because playing with them satisfies me and helps to calm my senses

-Since I was young, I have often developed certain tics and compulsive behaviors such as chewing the skin around my nails, popping my knuckles, grinding my teeth, tickling the roof of my mouth with my tongue, etc.

-I am fascinated by time and often spend time thinking about the amount of months, dates, years, decades, etc that have passed between 2 random events.

-I have some obsessions fuel by anxiety. Like for example, the faucet in my bathroom used to be leaky. So I would get up multiple times a night to make sure that it is properly closed. Another example(and one I currently have) is that I would get out of my bed multiple times to make sure that my bedroom door is properly locked.

-I get easily distracted and have trouble concentrating on things such as schoolwork.

-I tend to have poor coordination. I usually have trouble finding objects or following instructions that are given to me verbally.

-There are times when I have listening problems. For example, if someone says something to be that is completely coherent, it will still sound like incoherent gibberish once it hits me ears.

-I have a very elaborate and immersive imagination/fantasy world that I usually create in my head from the types of movies/TV shows I watch. This is another thing that started way back when I was young.

[Skeezyks]

Hello Jonn: Thanks for sharing your experiences &... welcome to PsychCentral! I hope you find the time you spend here to be of benefit. May I suggest you introduce yourself to the general membership over on our New Members Introductions forum? Here's a link:

https://forums.psychcentral.com/new-...introductions/

Since you're 17, one other forum that may be of interest is the Teens' Lounge. Here's a link to that forum:

https://forums.psychcentral.com/teens-lounge/

PsychCentral is a great place to get information regarding, & support for, mental health conditions. The more you post, & reply to other members' posts, the more a part of the community you will become. Plus there are the chat rooms where you'll be able to interact with other members in real time (once your first 5 posts have been reviewed & approved.) So please keep posting!

[downandlonely]

It sounds like you might be on the spectrum. I think I might be too actually. But I wouldn't feel comfortable diagnosing anyone. I suggest you see a doctor and tell them your symptoms.

[puzzclar]

There could be another diagnosis going on, some of it is a bit OCD in the way you discribed them like getting up and checking to see if the door is locked. Mental illness is quite complex as we are not just one thing. We are a combination of many factors. Good luck in your search. I would talk to a psychologist for further testing.

[Talthybius]

Originally Posted by downandlonely

It sounds like you might be on the spectrum. I think I might be too actually. But I wouldn't feel comfortable diagnosing anyone. I suggest you see a doctor and tell them your symptoms.

So dangerous to say this! Even when you follow it up with sensible comments

To the OP, so you have some 'odd' behaviors. Why does that require an explanation? And how would a diagnosis be an explanation? What does it actually explain?

Are you actually feeling that certain elements of your personality are detrimental to your satisfaction in life or your development as a person?

[Bookworm257]

I feel you. I also exhibit these traits and I've done ver extensive research on the topic. It sounds like you have it. I also think I have it. I told my parents I think I have it and they said they think it's possible. I hope you finally get the anwers you're looking for.

[PsychoPhil]

Originally Posted by Talthybius

So dangerous to say this! Even when you follow it up with sensible comments

To the OP, so you have some 'odd' behaviors. Why does that require an explanation? And how would a diagnosis be an explanation? What does it actually explain?

Are you actually feeling that certain elements of your personality are detrimental to your satisfaction in life or your development as a person?

JonnSmith listed a number of potentially problematic traits and behaviours. If difficulties with friendship, intimacy, concentration, listening, picking up instructions, and obsessive interests don't warrant an investigation, can you let us know what you would consider a good reason to seek a formal diagnosis?

[Talthybius]

A diagnosis is something a professional makes. Beyond that, you can endlessly discuss the meaning. The danger is that people think that there actually is a thing like BPD or ASD and that all those with a proper diagnosis share exactly that. That they share some neurological pathology.

So while you may want to label yourself, fine. But never label someone else. Yes, his list is similar to a list of symptoms. But this is self-reported and self-censored. There may be things not mentioned, false interpretations, things that exclude someone from the formal diagnosis, etc etc.

So it makes a lot more sense to talk with someone about the things they struggle with. And give advice on adaptations, work arounds, ways to progress, etc. This whole thing with diagnosis is 'I have mental disorder X. So now I can accept that I act like X.' or worse, people start to act out a personality disorder, either consciously or subconsciously, because they think that is who they are.

Now ASD is a not a personality disorder (I thought it was a syndrome, not a disorder). But a personality disorder is a certain personality type that can present in all people, but presents so strongly in a patient that it makes that person dysfunctional. That is all it is. It is not a disease you have. It is not a neurological pathology. It is a behavior pattern you exhibit at a certain moment.

You can exhibit all symptoms of a certain disorder and not have it according to professionals. And even if a professional determines a diagnosis, there is no way to confirm if a diagnosis is correct or not. Or if it means people with the same diagnosis necessarily benefit from the same treatment.

So when you see someone post a list here and ask if they have 'X', by saying 'yes' you only reenforce their behavior. If you don't have Aspergers and you act like you have Aspergers, something is 'wrong'. If you do have Aspergers and you act like you have Aspergers, everything is perfectly normal.

If you feel you need help, sure by all means, ask help. That is not the point. If you feel you need professional help. Sure. I never said that cannot be helpful. Just talking with someone can be a big relief. It is easy to think yourself into a knot. And a health care professional can help you un-knot your thinking. But let's not throw around diagnosis or even romanticize diagnosis.

[Smitkit]

Originally Posted by JonnSmith

Even since I was a child I have exhibited some odd behaviors that I have never understood or been able to explain. But recently, I’ve been researching about autistic spectrum disorders and realized that a lot of the symptoms associated with it are ones that I feel/have. I even took an online autism quotient test and scored a 38. But I understand that this isn’t intended to be a diagnosis so I’ll instead list the reasons why I think I may have it.

-I am extremely shy and strongly dislike change. I remember when I was a toddler, I would get anxious to the point of crying whenever my parents would leave me somewhere I wasn’t familiar with. It got to the point where several of the babysitters I had flat out refused to babysit me after a while because I would cry almost the entire time.

-This got better when I was 4-5, but it hasn’t completely went away. I usually have to learn social skills that other people pick up naturally. I still get extremely anxious in social situations and I find myself having trouble expressing my thoughts into words or not knowing how to respond when people talk to me. Also I have a fear about being watched or being the center of attention in public; which is why I very anxious when people make eye contact with me for a long period of time, clap for me, or even sing happy birthday to me.

-I was thought to be intellectually gifted when I was in kindergarten. And although I wasn’t classified as a genius, I was still found to have above average intelligence. I recently tested myself and scored my IQ at 129.

-Although I’ve had a few friends when I was young, they were never really close and I would usually prefer to spend most of my time doing things such as playing video games, rather than socializing. This really hasn’t changed as I don’t really feel love or a sense of emotional closeness towards anybody in my life.

-Ever since I was a child, I have had countless obsessive interests that I would immerse myself in. While they have changed throughout the years, one that I have now is history. I usually spend hours and hours reading articles and watching YouTube videos about historical topics to the point where I can even give very detailed descriptions about those topics.

-I also occasionally develop very random and strange interests that I can’t explain. Some of these have included types of coffee makers and Wi-Fi routers.

-I have an unusual fascination with finding patterns. For example, let’s say I saw a random set of numbers on a license plate; I would try hard to find a way that the numbers connect by adding, dividing or multiplying by the same number. Or another things I would do is look at floor tiles to see if the colors go in a pattern in the same shape and size. I also get simulated by warm showers; I could honestly stay in a shower for about 30-45 minutes.

-I get attached to inanimate objects; usually balls or rubber bands because playing with them satisfies me and helps to calm my senses

-Since I was young, I have often developed certain tics and compulsive behaviors such as chewing the skin around my nails, popping my knuckles, grinding my teeth, tickling the roof of my mouth with my tongue, etc.

-I am fascinated by time and often spend time thinking about the amount of months, dates, years, decades, etc that have passed between 2 random events.

-I have some obsessions fuel by anxiety. Like for example, the faucet in my bathroom used to be leaky. So I would get up multiple times a night to make sure that it is properly closed. Another example(and one I currently have) is that I would get out of my bed multiple times to make sure that my bedroom door is properly locked.

-I get easily distracted and have trouble concentrating on things such as schoolwork.

-I tend to have poor coordination. I usually have trouble finding objects or following instructions that are given to me verbally.

-There are times when I have listening problems. For example, if someone says something to be that is completely coherent, it will still sound like incoherent gibberish once it hits me ears.

-I have a very elaborate and immersive imagination/fantasy world that I usually create in my head from the types of movies/TV shows I watch. This is another thing that started way back when I was young.

Check out this article;

https://www.additudemag.com/autism-a...s-in-children/

Not a doc or nurse, but was misdiagnosed as ASP, because I was 32 at the time. I had developed some bad habits and avoidant behavior because of my untreated ADHD. (FYI - As we grow older the hyperactivity in ADHD becomes anxiety.)

Not sure if it’ll help, but could give you some insight for when you talk to a doc.

And as mentioned above; definitely see a professional psychiatrist for an appropriate safe diagnosis and treatment.

Good luck!

[MistressStayc]

Originally Posted by Talthybius

A diagnosis is something a professional makes. Beyond that, you can endlessly discuss the meaning. The danger is that people think that there actually is a thing like BPD or ASD and that all those with a proper diagnosis share exactly that. That they share some neurological pathology.

So while you may want to label yourself, fine. But never label someone else. Yes, his list is similar to a list of symptoms. But this is self-reported and self-censored. There may be things not mentioned, false interpretations, things that exclude someone from the formal diagnosis, etc etc.

So it makes a lot more sense to talk with someone about the things they struggle with. And give advice on adaptations, work arounds, ways to progress, etc. This whole thing with diagnosis is 'I have mental disorder X. So now I can accept that I act like X.' or worse, people start to act out a personality disorder, either consciously or subconsciously, because they think that is who they are.

Now ASD is a not a personality disorder (I thought it was a syndrome, not a disorder). But a personality disorder is a certain personality type that can present in all people, but presents so strongly in a patient that it makes that person dysfunctional. That is all it is. It is not a disease you have. It is not a neurological pathology. It is a behavior pattern you exhibit at a certain moment.

You can exhibit all symptoms of a certain disorder and not have it according to professionals. And even if a professional determines a diagnosis, there is no way to confirm if a diagnosis is correct or not. Or if it means people with the same diagnosis necessarily benefit from the same treatment.

So when you see someone post a list here and ask if they have 'X', by saying 'yes' you only reenforce their behavior. If you don't have Aspergers and you act like you have Aspergers, something is 'wrong'. If you do have Aspergers and you act like you have Aspergers, everything is perfectly normal.

If you feel you need help, sure by all means, ask help. That is not the point. If you feel you need professional help. Sure. I never said that cannot be helpful. Just talking with someone can be a big relief. It is easy to think yourself into a knot. And a health care professional can help you un-knot your thinking. But let's not throw around diagnosis or even romanticize diagnosis.

Autism spectrum disorder is a very much a neurological disorder that deals with pathways in the brain (unique pathways to each person with ASD that are not neuro-typical). It is not simply a pattern of behavior at a certain moment. The patterns of behavior that are displayed are symptoms of the disorder.

[Talthybius]

If autism spectrum disorder is a neurological disorder that deals with pathways in the brain, then how come ASD isn't diagnosed by measuring brain pathways or observing brain activity?

This is exactly the problem. No mental health diagnosis comes anywhere close to what would normally be the standard in medicine. Yes, we have reasons to believe that if given enough time, we will be able to detect at least some cases of autism through a diagnosis that meets the standards required in medicine.

[MistressStayc]

Originally Posted by Talthybius

If autism spectrum disorder is a neurological disorder that deals with pathways in the brain, then how come ASD isn't diagnosed by measuring brain pathways or observing brain activity?

This is exactly the problem. No mental health diagnosis comes anywhere close to what would normally be the standard in medicine. Yes, we have reasons to believe that if given enough time, we will be able to detect at least some cases of autism through a diagnosis that meets the standards required in medicine.

This is directly quoted from the nat'l institute of health/nat'l institute of neurological disorders and stroke website. https://www.ninds.nih.gov/Disorders/...der-Fact-Sheet

"Autism spectrum disorder (ASD) refers to a group of complex neurodevelopment disorders characterized by repetitive and characteristic patterns of behavior and difficulties with social communication and interaction. The symptoms are present from early childhood and affect daily functioning."

I imagine it would be very expensive and difficult to diagnosis if you had to measure and observe neurons firing in someone's brain as they process information or communicate with people. Especially considering each individual has their own unique pathways. I'm not sure they are a standard set of pathways for neuro-typical people to begin even diagnosing this way for brain disorders. Sorry, I'm not a neurologist, just a mother of a child with autism and a teacher to students with autism who has been to doctors, therapies and many conferences on autism as well as taken 12 credit hours on autism itself alone for my certificate. I'm not an expert but I have learned a-lot over the years. I have educated myself with facts, not just decided to come to my own conclusions.