[dreamsofflight]

Hi,

I'm presently experiencing a lot of irritability. I know its mania "bleeding through" as I call it (my pdoc agrees). Actually a lot of anger afraid I might rage today. Two weeks ago I got into a bad fight w/my daughter b/c I was feeling like this upset my parents I feel like (I know) they all think there goes crazy J. again. I'm so tired of being like this.

I'm BP II, but I stay on the depressive side (the meds I take have kept me from having a "real" manic ep. for 10 yrs.) I feel like I'm getting so angry right now and I'm starting to cry. I have few friends and absolutely no one I can talk to about this. None of them would understand and I feel so alone.

I just need to write this and "talk" to ppl who understand. thanks

[Hunny]

((((((((((( Dreamsofflight ))))))))))))

Whoa, big stuff!

Can you write more? I don't really have BP but there are many who do here. I want to be supportive of you until you can get to those who know.

You are pretty new here, so welcome and I hope you find the conversations you are asking for.

Hunny

[nuwondery]

You sound a lot like me. I have the same issues it seems. I think I need to find a new dr. cause mine doesnt seem to be very helpful.

Originally Posted by dreamsofflight

Hi,

I'm presently experiencing a lot of irritability. I know its mania "bleeding through" as I call it (my pdoc agrees). Actually a lot of anger afraid I might rage today. Two weeks ago I got into a bad fight w/my daughter b/c I was feeling like this upset my parents I feel like (I know) they all think there goes crazy J. again. I'm so tired of being like this.

I'm BP II, but I stay on the depressive side (the meds I take have kept me from having a "real" manic ep. for 10 yrs.) I feel like I'm getting so angry right now and I'm starting to cry. I have few friends and absolutely no one I can talk to about this. None of them would understand and I feel so alone.

I just need to write this and "talk" to ppl who understand. thanks

Your situation sounds al

[BNLsMOM]

I completely understand. When I get that way, I have had rages. I get so irritable and angry and anxious. I have been having all day panic attacks occassionally, the most recent being yesterday. It's tiring. We're here for you.

[thinker22]

Completely relate. I'm Bipolar I, but on the depressive side 95% of the time. Have a manic episode about once a year on average, but they still don't have my meds right so I'm having anger, irritability and rage sometimes out of no where and it scares me. Then I get exhausted and need to sleep just to calm down. I also think it's a manic episode trying to seep through. I scream in the car to try to calm down after something triggers me when I'm not at the apartment.

I don't argue with my mate or pick fights, but when the emotional roller coaster comes, the most ridiculous things bother me and before you know it we're raising our voices about say recycling (i.e. what they will and won't take...I say no plastic bags, he says why not? They should. I'm gonna keep using them, etc.) I also don't like to be touched or even make small talk when in this state.

All this to say, sorry you're going through it, and perhaps a meds change is in order? My mood stabilizer is still being upped and I feel like this process will never end. Guess I'll reevaluate once I'm up to a "therapeutic dose."

Always here to listen.

[dreamsofflight]

Hi everyone! thanks for writing.

I take seroquel 150 mg and lamictal 400 mg a day @night before I go to sleep b/c even after years of taking Seroquel it still knocks me out pretty good.also clonzapame 2mg can take up to 4/day for anxiety.

Two weeks ago I got an emergency appt w/my pdoc b/c of the fight, etc... He told me to take 25 mg extra (he gave me samples) of Seroquel - during the day. I wasn't so sure about that. Could I function on Seroquel during the day?

Once I got home I saw the samples had all expired, but he's reassured me before that meds can be effective long past due date. I felt sleepy during the day at first then not. BUT I then noticed only a few of the pills were to expire 08/08 the others 01/08!! which I think has got to be too long!

I have a lot of faith in my pdoc so I didn't call just hoped I was really getting better. Then yesterday. Today I slept a lot even though I didn't take the extra Seroquel. I can just make myself sleep usually if I want/need to. I felt I did b/c I didn't want to yell or whatever at my daughter.

I feel so groggy right now, I can't tell what my mood is! But I'm so grateful for the support and for those of you who've confirmed that this prob is mania.
That its probably mania isn't great, duh, but at least I feel like I know what I'm dealing with. I hate feeling scared and like I'm crazy.

Thanks for listening, Jen

[dreamsofflight]

didn't see a comment that a mod would be checking my post before posting so now I don't know if my post went through? Thanks, J

[thinker22]

Weird about the expired meds. I mean, I know that expiration dates are a part of a scam (in terms of pharmaceuticals put an agent into the tablets to make them less than effective over time because they make more money if pharmacies have to reorder them when they don't sell), but I didn't think the concept altogether was BS...i.e. the dates are a hoax. I guess it would be cheaper just to stamp an arbitrary date on the box. Most drugs would be good for decades if no such expiration agent were added to them, provided they were not exposed to the elements: heat, light, cold or moisture.

This is my opinion. I have no idea what the FDA says about the above, so don't take my word on it. It's just what I've heard doctors say when they talk to their close friends.

I don't have a beef with the pharmaceutical companies, though, because they send me my meds for free. And I'd be in very bad shape without them.

Seroquel makes me super groggy the next day. I take as little as possible and deal with less than a full night of sleep. I've heard that the higher the dose, the less the sleepiness effect. Like your body builds up an immunity or something? Maybe like Benadryl works less well over time?

Anywhose, just a thought.

[dreamsofflight]

I have an appt. Mon. I'm not going to call him, just talk about it then. Thanks for your input!