[NuckingFutz]

It has been 6 weeks since my attempt. I have been put on new meds, am in individual counseling and tomorrow i start group counseling as well. Before my attempt i lost a good buddy in iraq. I lost all caution and grabbed the first available person to be affectionate with. He turned out to be a psychotic crackhead with a sick girlfriend. they continued cotact after my attempt. Both of them continued their bs. I cut all ties to them 5 days ago. I guess healing from the twisted things he did and the abusive things she said will haunt me for awhile. I am a veteran, i never thought i would see such darkness in peoples hearts unless we were at war with them. I guess i have learned to be cautious especially when i am emotionally vulnerable. Aside from that, i want to fight for a better life...i want to work again and have a car again and live among others who are living full lives too. I just wanted to share. So if you are reading this, thank you for taking the time to read this. nuckingfutz

[thinker22]

It's good to hear you're standing up for yourself. You do deserve to live a better life and live among those trying to improve themselves. Giving in to the bad things in life is easy. Fighting to make oneself and the world a little better and less painful is courageous and worth everything.



Will be back on in the am. Time to take nighty night meds.

[NuckingFutz]

So good to hear from you. I would like to hear from you and know how you are doing. Send me a pm soon. Your statement about fighting to make life better is harder. As ernest hemmingway once wrote "the world is a beautiful place, and worth fighting for". I agree with the second part.

[pinkisfloyd]

Hi Futz, glad you are still with us. You sound pretty positive and that is a great sign. Never give up the fight. If you ever want to talk, you can send me an email. Only thing, I just discovered I need to post 4 more times.

Take care,
Ken

[NuckingFutz]

Thanks ken. I appreciate you reaching out to me. One good way i guess to improve my life is to nuture positive relationships and walk away or shut down negative ones.

[thinker22]

Originally Posted by NuckingFutz

Your statement about fighting to make life better is harder. As ernest hemmingway once wrote "the world is a beautiful place, and worth fighting for". I agree with the second part.

If the world was such a beautiful place, why did he blow his head off? I'm with you. We have to make it a better place through our actions. And yes, he was in a lot of pain, but there had to be a less messy way to go out. I won't give anyone ideas, but you know what I'm talking about.

Anyways, sorry. I'm so morbid sometimes. I think that Hemingway was a great writer. He had a family history of mood disorders. It's hard to break out of such strong environmental and genetic factors, but it is possible.

Okay, I'm going to sign off. I'm super drowsy. Maybe Abilify? Felt this way last night too at the concert about an hour and a half after taking it.

for NF.

[NuckingFutz]

Abilify works fast, careful with that stuff. Believe it or not, men blow their heads off more than women because women are more vain. Also, i think ernie was not taking meds. Maybe it would have comprimised his writing.

[pinkisfloyd]

Originally Posted by NuckingFutz

Thanks ken. I appreciate you reaching out to me. One good way i guess to improve my life is to nuture positive relationships and walk away or shut down negative ones.

No problem Futz. I think your last line is quotable! I feel that my current mania is an awaken for me. I have learned so much in the last few days. And, I have made some great connections.

[Trying & Caring]

Best of luck to you. My "last" one was 3 yrs. ago & I'm still dealing w/the aftermath. Indiv. therapy & dialectical Behavioral Therapy helping a lot. But sometimes it is a huge struggle for me..

Rebuilding your life--great attitude.

[thinker22]

Hi everyone. NF, I am only on 2mg Abilify. It's weird that it's causing drowsiness if it is. Eh, doesn't matter I guess, provided I'm not outside of my house or near to a couch or bed.

[NuckingFutz]

Maybe a side effect that may go away soon...if not, call your doc. He may be able to adjust the dose.

[ammbs]

I'm glad you pulled though. If it wasn't for veteran's like you, we wouldn't have the freedom's we have today. Sometimes in life we're dealt crappy hands and people, but just remember to keep your head up and keep moving forward. I'm always here if you need someone to talk to.

Stay strong,
Amber