[Nypheria]

I flipped out.

I was sad. Angery.Happy and uncareing at the same time. I took a shower - shaved one of my legs and asked my fiancee which one looked better.

He told me the one that I shaved. I went back in the bathtub and cried and wrote all over the walls.

I dont know what happened. I just want to be alone right now and feel in the dumps.

He likes porn and women with 100000 tons of makeup over a real women.

I remeber there was a time he loved me like I was. I never wore makeup, and he loved that about me. He loved that natural side of me, he used to call me the "wild beauty". It made me feel lovely, even compared to those fake and overdone women.

Now he says "makeup once in awhile is fine." Basiclly Im getting ugly? I dont get it.

This rollar-coaster was too fast and cant think right. I want to lash out, destroy, break...

But another part of me wants to cry and yet here I am laughing! I DONT GET ME! This is so DUMB. So how do you control yourself. Im supposed to be on Zyprexa but stopped taking it because of pregnancy. I need support, comfort and just a friend. He ran away to the other room and isnt very supportive.

[BNLsMOM]

It's amazing what our emotions can do to us.

I am having a hard time keeping up with my hygeine lately, and my legs are a forest right now. (I know, TMI) My husband will actually show his disgust on his face and shudder when he catches a glimpse of my legs. Sometimes I want to cry, other times I stick my leg in his face and tease him because it is fun to disgust him. If he is going to be mean to me, I'll do it right back sometimes. Other times I'll go off and sulk.

He doesn't know what to think.

This is hard for us and hard for our SO's. We're all doing the best we can and we all need breaks form one another at times. It doesn't mean he doesn't love you or thinks you're ugly. I am sure he loves you and thinks you are beautiful. He probably wants to help you by suggesting things that he thinks will make you feel better.

Alas, he is a guy and guys speak their own language. When he says, "A little make up won't hurt." He is probably saying, "You might feel better if you feel beautiful."

It's hard for us to translate their language anyway, but when our emotions are messing with us through bipolar and pregnancy, all bets are off.

I hope you are feeling a little better. Can you do something good for yourself?

[Anneinside]

A difficult time, dealing with untreated bipolar and hormones during your pregnancy. Emotions are bound to run high. I am sorry you are going through this. Try to remember that the things your SO is saying are his problems, not yours.

[Pamela Choi]

I guess I don’t know if you suffer from bipolar, I read your profile and did not see it listed.

No worries, bipolar have different stages of highs and lows. Encompassed with your pregnancy your hormones are in overdrive.

Many things can trigger the mania and the feelings are real. Relationships, self esteem/self validation is very important.

Sometimes it’s hard to see ourselves as others view us, and even harder with bipolar.

People always tell me things especially my boyfriend and others that I am beautiful, however dealing with bipolar, one negative comment or action can hunt us for ever.

I know these sounds hard but try to communicate your feeling with him.