[captain123]

Hi everyone,
I am new to this forum and I'm really just looking for some support from people who are going through what I go through everyday. I feel like everyday is a battle. Am I going to get out of bed? Am I going to have a panic attack at work? Am I even going to go to work? What kind of thoughts are going to race through my head all day? Am I going to be able to get my work done? I was diagnosed Bipolar II in October 2008, and even still after all the medication and therapy still feel like I will never feel like I did before all of this started. Does anyone remember the last time they were truly happy? Medication free? I dunno, I am just looking for some support....I don't know what else to say, yet, I have so much to say...but I will close for now and peruse the site...see how other people cope and use the site

[gravyyy]

Hi captain! Welcome to PC. It's a great place to come to chat about being happy, sad, or just to share or vent or whatever! Everyone is very friendly and helpful. I cannot remember the last time I was truly happy. Diagnosed with Bipolar II in 2007 but just got changed to Bipolar I (though I've never been manic) 1 week ago. I hear you expressing frustraion, hopelessness, fear right now. I understand that and go through all the same emotions frequently. I will need meds the rest of my life and most people with bipolar disorder will. I am hoping that after a while my moods will even out and I will become more stable. Feel free to Private message (PM) me any time. Hang in there and keep your head up. You won't always feel like you feel now.

[liljamie23]

hello and welcome

[NuckingFutz]

Hi Captain, you described me almost perfectly except I will always be on meds and be greatful for them because my mom did not have the meds we do now and so she's dead and yes I remember the last time I was truely happy because I have learned to cherrish those times. I think this is a great site for info and support. Keep reading and posting. Carry on soldier. NuckingFutz out here.

[cajalion82]

Hi diagnosed 2002 bipolar...welcome to the mental health world.

Hi captain123 and welcome to pc! I'm BP II too. In regards to your question... truly happy? Unmedicated? Yeah, in the past year, but I was definitely hypomanic at the time ("I don't need meds, everything's fabulous!" Then came the crash...you know the drill...). With meds that are working, I have to say that I am truly happy atm. Still, there are days when getting out of bed is a question mark. A struggle. But things even out through the day far far more than they used to.
"Before this all started" is another question altogether... I was only accurately diagnosed w/in the past year, but it's been going on for like 30 years and I can't honestly remember the good times so much as the bad. Sooo, then the question becomes before the diagnosis and meds... well, let's just say it wasn't good. That I wouldn't feel that way is no loss. I don't *want* to feel the way I did before that. It was gawdawfulhorrible, with spells of overblown spending/project starting/just flippin' crazy ***** ideas in between. Anyway, yeah.
This is a great site for support. It's fabulous in that way. A nice place to not feel so alone in the things that we go through. Again, welcome and looking forward to your posts!