[Amandas256]

I'm havig a really hard time right now. My husband is going to file for a divorce and I don't want one! I asked him if he would go to councilling but he refused. He told me that he thinks I'm attractive and that he loves me but, he still wants a divorce. I'm so confused! I wish I could find a way to save my marriage!

[BNLsMOM]

Oh no, I am so sorry. No wonder you can't sleep. Is there any way to sit down and talk with him and a therapist, or clergy or some neutral third party before he files?

(((Amanda)))

[WendyAussie]

Amanda I've never been married so have no wisdom but I do extend my compassion to you as this must be the most difficult of times. XX

[Amandas256]

He refuses to see a therapist. He says that he is done. He can't handle the Bipolar anymore. I wish he would have decided this 10 years ago when we got married instead of now when I'm in the shape I'm in mentally. I have got to find a job so I can afford to live on my own. This is going to be so hard on me. I just hope I can actually work. Okay, I'm done with my pity party now. Sorry I rambled!

[Cthomas]

Amanda,

Thats the same thing my husband did to me. after 14 years. and again after 16 years. Ive gotten him to calm down. he also wont go to therapy with me. we just cant seem to get things in synch. hope this works out for you in the end.

cthomas

[Amandas256]

Thanks Cthomas. It's nice to know that people understand this mess that's my life!

[Cthomas]

Understand it? more like living it....lol

They dont know how to handle us. especially when moods start flippin all over the place. men cant handle women period. add to that being bipolar and they are downright lost.

My husband stuck around. Let me tell you there are days i wish he didnt.

Like right now. Its ok for him to point fingers at me, but when he does something....omg....forget it.

Hope this helps. You take care.

c

[owllover99]

Dear, when stuff like this happens, the reality is he may love you, he may not. I know you have problems and probably want to stay with him. But from now on even if he changes his mind, it would be an insecure relationship because of this happening, because it could happen again. Whether you stay with him or not I would look for some help if you can't work and a job if you can. It would help the relationship. It is not easy especially being bipolar. But nowdays you either got to get help from the govt. or some other group or work. Depending upon another person you're living with is shaky at best. Even if you're married. I have had the rug pulled out from under me when I was married. I believe in love and committment and family and all those things. But I know when the chips are down I better take care of me cause nobody human will. I do believe God will help me. In God I trust. All others I wonder about.
I wish you all the best. Hugs, Owl.

[vjdragonfly]

I'm so sorry to hear this Amanda. I know you must be so devastated. I'm sorry he refuses to go to therapy with you. I hope that something will change his mind.

[Amandas256]

Thanks everyone. I really appreciate it. I am getting a job so I can stand on my own. I will never put myself in this position again. I am definately gonna start relying on myself instead of someone else.

[owllover99]

Hugs, Hugs, Hugs, and don't let down. Owl.