I'm a mess today!

I'm supposed to go to my first group in 5 more hrs. I'm shaking, and my tummy is a volcano, not new, just really bad. I keep thinking I'm going
to walk in, if I make it, and either walk back out, or, react in a very bad way.
Will they make me introduce myself? I guess I should of asked my Tdoc more questions, I always forget. I know I need to do this, I actually want to, but I
don't know if my brain, and body will cooperate?

Hi kj44,
I just completed a three week course of ALL DAY group therapy and felt the same way going in on my first day. I was surprised at how well I reacted to it. I've not had much time to process my diagnosis of Bipolar yet and am currently in a major depressive state that has lasted months, so I had pretty much isolated myself and interacted with no one outside my immediate family and my pdoc/T.

The group I went to was approx 12-18 people, mostly bipolar and depression/anxiety. They did ask me to introduce myself and say what brought me there. Once I got through that it was easy as pie! You don't have to say much at all if you don't want to, but you'd be surprised how much you have to say in the company of others that feel the same as you do. It was like a dam breaking for me and it felt very good!

Since my group was 6 freaking hours long, we had lots of time, so we had topics to cover everyday, like: Fear, Anxiety, Depression, Trust, Dissapointment, etc etc, and sometimes had writing assignments to complete on how those topics apply to you personally. So mine was alot like a course in psychology. If yours is shorter, you may only have group "discussion" that is lead by a therapist.

Also, fyi, alot (most) of the information on thought/behavior change for my group was based on a spiritual perspective, kinda structured to resemble the 12 step program for AA. I wasn't prepared for this and I was a little uncomfortable with it, as I follow some alternative philosophies on the divine plan. But whatever you believe can usually be fit into whatever general theory that was presented, so it still meshed.
Sorry for the long post, I tend to ramble!!
Good luck and I hope you have a good experience with it, It helped me open up!

Saywhat?

Thank-you so much for that information. I am having a very hard time processing the bi-polar thing. I have actually spent 8 weeks in a drug re-hab. So thinking back on it, I realized that I never talked in the group sessions. It did help me some, I quit drinking,and drugs, but I have been medicated one way or another since then. So now that I know, why I am the way I am, maybe it could help I really, really, really want to get better! I hate where I'm at! So really, thank-you for your input. I'm going to try. I'm changing from minute to minute today!

kj, do you have any certain thing that you do to cope with rapid mood changes/racing thoughts? I do and I didn't even know that's what I was doing until my T pointed it out to me: I read or listen to music REALLY loud, oh and watch mindless TV (judge judy is my hero!).

I'm a reader by nature, so I read to keep my thoughts on something else. If I find myself drifting back to the thoughts I want to avoid, I reread the page I'm one until my focus returns to the book. I read an article once that said reading can be a narcotic for depression as it can become an effective and simple way to escape. So there's the downside, but it can help when you need it.

I'm also an avid fan of music, so I keep my ipod current and make playlists for my moods. If I'm depressed I listen to really up beat music, like what you'd listen to while working out. If my anxiety is high and I need to relax, I have a playlist for that, which has bunch of Enya music that would put most people to sleep.
And for me, it has to be LOUD, but that's just me.

And TV? well, that's just a guilty pleasure of mine. I flip channels til I find the trashiest show on at that time, and cuddle up on the couch until my mind wanders.

Figure out what you tend to do when anxiety is through the roof and try to turn it into a concious action. Of course this doesn't apply to really destructive stuff like drinking to oblivion or popping some pills, but you get what I mean!
You're in my thoughts!

Hi kj44 it's natural to feel nervous the first day of group. I felt that way too and have felt that way when I started with a new therapist. You can do itLet us know how it went.

Thank you! Actually, I usually do feel better listening to loud music! My hubby always asks me, why I listen so loud? That's funny because, I never really realized it was good for me! As for reading, I used to, haven't been able to sit still for a while though. I'm going to go, drive there at least! I will let you know. Thanks for the support, really needed it!

Thank-you Beth, I will let you know

Meeting new people, and especially if the intent is that you will have to eventually open up and expose some vulnerable parts - it is NOT easy.
I hope it went well - please give us feedback.
I honestly don't yet have the courage to go to group therapy, and luckily my T has not suggested anything along these lines yet

Hey kj! How did it go yesterday? We're thinking about you...

Here's a link to some funny "daily affirmations" that might give you a good laugh- a warning, though, DON'T read if you're not comfortable with poking fun at folks with psych diagnoses!!

Laughing at myself helps me get through the day, but not everyone feels the same.

http://lukasland.com/humour/Funstuff...firmations.htm

Hi kj44! And welcome to the forums! Sorry to not have posted here (been sporadic in general on that lately), but wanted you to know that I've been reading along. So how did it go?

(I remember the first time I went to a group. Nervous? You better believe it! Seem to recall saying something like my dx and being first time in a group, wasn't ready to say anything. Usually didn't for quite some time. Then usually a little bit. Went regularly even if I didn't really feel like it, because you just never know(!) There may be someone you can comfort simply by being able to relate to their experience, so they don't feel so alone. Then, about a month ago, I needed to be there very very badly and was glad to have established the connection, or I wouldn't have known where else to turn, you know? <IRL, needed more localized help>)

Don't know if this is a specific group you need to go to, but if not and you give it some time and just doesn't seem quite right, there is probably another, so don't worry overmuch about that, ok?