[Kymaro]

So today I have gone from manic to sever depression in all about 6 hrs. Started my day off busy with lots of things to do and lots of energy to get it all done, in half the time I planned. I knew I was a bit hyper as I was talking to strangers. I even asked the teller at the bank why they didnt put the "list of options for the drive through" in alphabetical order. I remember thinking how irritating it was to be all out of order like that. Driving home from my "duties" today - I would make funny faces at peeps at the stop lights and getting a great laugh out of reactions on their reactions. I WAS having a great day. Then my husband called and started talking to me "about a conversation" we had had this morning about christmas plan and I dont remember the conversation..He says "Your jumping conversation on me I cant keep up with you". I just had so much to tell him! . Now the 20 questions about "did you take your meds" "how long have you been acting like this" etc........He acting like I'm doing and saying things that are irrational! Now Im angry - I feel stupid cuz I dont remember the conversation, is there other things I dont remember? I really don't think Im being irrational. I WAS feeling like I was just having a little fun today, and well deserved as its been a stressfull week at work. He actually came home from work and shoved pills down my throat and now my mother-in-law is here to babysit me. This is freaking WRONG. So the music is a little to load, laughing comes a little to easy, and the simplest of things are entertaining......What the hell is wrong with that! I feel like everyone around me is over reacting and every thing I try to say to defend myself comes out wrong and just makes the whole situation worse. So Im giving up....took their stupid pills, sitting here being quiet, and wishing to hell everyone would just leave me alone! So Im new to this forum and thought I would share my experience today. I've kept it as simple as I can so you dont have to read for an hour.....lol But I guess this is suppose to make me feel like Im not do alone during times like this.

[blueoctober]

Welcome Kymaro I understand the feeling of enjoying a hypomanic episode. Since my diagnosis in 2007 I've stopped enjoying it because (a) what goes up must come down and (b) I find I'm off-putting to others in the state. I think it's great that you have a husband and family that cares for you. I hope you find this site supportive.

We also have a BP Social Society. If you would like to join the link is in my signature.

[Ryask]

Originally Posted by Kymaro

So today I have gone from manic to sever depression in all about 6 hrs. Started my day off busy with lots of things to do and lots of energy to get it all done, in half the time I planned. I knew I was a bit hyper as I was talking to strangers. I even asked the teller at the bank why they didnt put the "list of options for the drive through" in alphabetical order. I remember thinking how irritating it was to be all out of order like that. Driving home from my "duties" today - I would make funny faces at peeps at the stop lights and getting a great laugh out of reactions on their reactions. I WAS having a great day. Then my husband called and started talking to me "about a conversation" we had had this morning about christmas plan and I dont remember the conversation..He says "Your jumping conversation on me I cant keep up with you". I just had so much to tell him! . Now the 20 questions about "did you take your meds" "how long have you been acting like this" etc........He acting like I'm doing and saying things that are irrational! Now Im angry - I feel stupid cuz I dont remember the conversation, is there other things I dont remember? I really don't think Im being irrational. I WAS feeling like I was just having a little fun today, and well deserved as its been a stressfull week at work. He actually came home from work and shoved pills down my throat and now my mother-in-law is here to babysit me. This is freaking WRONG. So the music is a little to load, laughing comes a little to easy, and the simplest of things are entertaining......What the hell is wrong with that! I feel like everyone around me is over reacting and every thing I try to say to defend myself comes out wrong and just makes the whole situation worse. So Im giving up....took their stupid pills, sitting here being quiet, and wishing to hell everyone would just leave me alone! So Im new to this forum and thought I would share my experience today. I've kept it as simple as I can so you dont have to read for an hour.....lol But I guess this is suppose to make me feel like Im not do alone during times like this.

First off i'd like to say welcome to the forums, i hope they can be a great support to you! As for your situation i think the important think to try and be aware of is well, at least they care about you, it can be frustrating at times when you get the questions about your moods and meds when your just happy or sad but try to remember it come from a place of love and caring, even if it is irritating at the time. i'm with you however i love me a little hypo mania, it sure feels good sometimes especially after a down cycle or long week, but it's also not good all the time, and it can get out of hand quickly, sometimes you don't even realize, so you should feel lucky to know you have someone looking out for your well being! Maybe after a bit of time you can feel differently about it!



ryask

[BlackPup]

welcome
your story sounds familiar though my partner has never got his mum to babysit me!!! that must really suck... I agree with Beth's (blue october) reasons for getting rid of the highs, as much as I loved them...

[RRU96]

Welcome. Everyone here has been there I am sure. Hypomania can be addictive... when its good. But it is dangerous. As for having one of those days.... You are VERY not alone. Today was one of the worst days I have had in awhile.

Woke up groggy (from new pill doc gave)
Paid for most expensive gas near my route today on accident ($2.93 gallon). Had I waited a few miles I would have had it for $2.79
The U-Haul hitch should have taken 30 minutes. Took over an hour.
Had to drive down a bad road in the city I hate(Same intersection I got T-boned in over a year ago).
In-Laws wait until I am about to expect company to get me to help them.
I get there then they want to finish putting crap in the boxes.
It is my sister-in-laws crap and she couldnt even help load it.
Get to storage unit - Break father-in-laws tailgate handle.
Nephew wont listen to anyone so I get on him and grab his toy and throw it back in the storage shed.
Went to load up the truck with junk(turning in scrap metal tomorrow) and then my sister in law takes it.
Get it finally and then cut my hand with glass a little later. Go to Wal-mart and got behind the one cashier who everyone ended up at... but nobody should have been at. Skipped to another isle, waited in line.... and got done before the first girl was finished with first customer.
Wife has been trying to help me out in my mood. Though brings up failures from my past like my t-shirt printing business dream.... etc..



Yeah. We've all been there. My day may not be like anyone elses.... but you are surely not alone.

[PT52]

Hi Kymaro, welcome to PC. Hope you can cut your hubs some slack - it seems he's trying to help in the best way he can.

He acting like I'm doing and saying things that are irrational!

Reading your post, it does look as if you were a bit over-the-top with the hypomania; and when you're in the middle of it, it's hard to see it from an objective point of view.

I hope that you will become a regular here - there is so much support and acceptance. This is a safe place to rant, vent, be open and honest...and know that everyone here has been (or is) where you are at.

[Kymaro]

Thanks everyone for being so supportive, having a side of view that wasnt "related" to me was very helpfull. Blueoctober---ur right, the down sucked!. Feeling better, but now cant seem to balence back out - each day seems to be going each and every way - very minor and tolerable but Im sure I'll balence back out soon.

PS:RRu96 hope your day got better, if not the next one then! :-)

[blueoctober]

Glad you're doing better Kymaro

[Trippin2.0]

I hope you come to enjoy our little community as much as I have, we're very close-knit, so I look forward to seeing you around.

On the hypomanic bit, Mine's much like yours and I love it to bits too...
you're definitely not alone! XOXO

[sugahorse1]

Hi and welcome.
I'm glad you were able to finally enjoy yourself, but you do need to be aware of the crash that usually follows. It's great to hear you have such an amazing support system. When you look back, I'm sure you'll realise they only have your best interest at heart, even if it may seem like they are "Stifling your fun" right now.

[Kymaro]

hi everyone back again - not sure if I should start a new thread or keep it here since it's an update. Still hanging out at the higher end of normal (or lower end of hypomania) but running out of energy fast. I just realized I have worked 42 hrs in the past 3 days, and Im sched to work another 14 hrs today. I dont even have that "Im to tired to go to work feeling". I have slept about 3 to 4 hrs each night and and starting to feel a bit of lag but not much. I am kinda pleased with myself as the money will be nice and I have used all this energy constructively. It also has been nice to avoid the family....not in a bad way - I know they are supportive - but I cant change the way I feel and I hate taking pills that make me all loopy (sp). Besides, it has kept me from facing the family. I understand now, that I am putting them in a "be the bad guy" situation and keeping my distance reduces their stress to :-) Last night I got a bit worried because I was starting to "see things" that were not there. I know they were not real cuz it was stupid stuff like a polar bear on the side of the road. Silly part is I even stoped to look at it then realized "yea right like that is really going to happen in michigan". I'm still in my right mind, so I'm able to say "thats not real".

After today I have the next two days off and I'm afraid this isnt going to slow down. I know myself and if I keep real busy I can keep my mind off myself and keep my focus on other things. Ignoring it persay. Not sure how to handle where I'm at at this point. I know in the past when this happen the family sends me to the psych doc who ends up putting me in the hospital, but his time I've managed to avoid the family thus the appointment but "crap" I have the next two days off! As I have read through the other posts Im worried I've probably made a poor choice. But I am "standing my ground" and I'm not going to the hospital! I guess I be taking the "loopy" pills for the next few days and try and find something constructive to do.

PS: Its kinda nice to write all this stuff down.its like telling a secret friend how you "really feel" without the fear that they're going to overreact and judge me..reading back has been helpfull, like a diary with a non-judgemental advice. Thanks everyone!

[blueoctober]

Kymaro the seeing things could be a symptom of the bipolar or it could be from not getting enough sleep.

I'm sure you know already, but there are many med options for BP and if you feel the meds make you "loopy" I suggest speaking to your pdoc about it and discuss the options.

[Kymaro]

I'm pretty sure its the lack of sleep. eye lids are heavy this afternoon.