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  #1  
Old Dec 21, 2010, 01:21 PM
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Ryask Ryask is offline
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Ok..so..i have a very..slight...agoraphobia...of some sorts.....i just don't like people..or places with crows...it makes me want to vomit...or have a panic attack...i can't do that in public...i break out in hives...and everyone stares at me. I have...an...event...tonight..it's ...an unveiling of a compilation of..photographs...kinda like a prize...and my photo..won..and i should be happy..and i am..but i do not want to attend this thing...my husband wont really understand..he's making me go...but if it was just an outing...i could possibly handle it..but what if they call me up...or say my name..and i freak out? I can just visualize them all looking at me...and me having a panic attack right there in front of them...it's...paralyzing......how can i explain...to my husband...i mean..it's bordering on...scary..how bad i don't want to go...and what i am willing to do...to get out of it...I'm not gonna say because i don't want to trigger anyone...but ..lets just say..I'm feeling like something terrible has to happen..for me to get out of this..and i am willing to make it happen.....i just need some tools...you know...some kinda...help...like...something...relaxation...or...some stupid trick..just something..
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  #2  
Old Dec 21, 2010, 01:32 PM
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BNLsMOM BNLsMOM is offline
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Congrats on the prize. I totally understand your fear. I used to wish for terrible things to happen so that I could get out of going places.

My T says to try to think the scenario out to its very end and then go over and over it until the scary stuff seems silly. I haven't done this yet, but it might work for you...
Thanks for this!
Ryask
  #3  
Old Dec 21, 2010, 01:40 PM
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sundog sundog is offline
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Congratulations on winning the photo prize!!!! I'm sorry you're so anxious about the event. I can definitely relate to the crippling panic and "what-if" type catastrophic thinking you describe.

Can you take an Ativan or similar to help you get through it???

Good luck to you!!
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Peace is every step
~ Thich Nhat Hanh
Thanks for this!
Ryask
  #4  
Old Dec 21, 2010, 01:40 PM
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ladyjrnlist ladyjrnlist is offline
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Breathe and envision everything going perfectly tonight. Walk it through in your head that you are calm, people are warm and kind to you and focus on the fact that your photo won! That is totally cool!
You can do this! Deep breaths and keep imagining a perfect evening!!!!
Thanks for this!
Ryask
  #5  
Old Dec 21, 2010, 02:14 PM
Anonymous45023
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Ryask View Post
...but what if they call me up...or say my name..and i freak out? I can just visualize them all looking at me...and me having a panic attack right there in front of them...it's...paralyzing......how can i explain...to my husband...
Firstly, congratulations!!!

Can definitely relate. Some agoraphobia (waxes and wanes), black and white catastrophic thinking (at least that's what a T called it, )

The big thing that struck me? (And an idea for...) How can you explain to your husband?? Wouldn't worry about that really. Why? When you say, "...but what if they...". Who are "they"? The people running it? Now for the idea. Tell them ahead of time. No need to go into specifics (agoraphobia, panic attacks etc), but just to say something like..."Listen. I'm not quite sure how these things are run, or if you even do such things, but if you do, I'd be immensely grateful if you could not call me up or even say my name. I'm very shy and this would make me extremely uncomfortable." Perhaps you could suggest that if they were so inclined, they could talk about the photo itself, speaking of its strengths -- ie. why they chose it. Or not, depending on how you feel about that. I'm sure the work speaks for itself. Also strongly consider that they may not even have any plans to do that ! I've been to quite a number of openings, art shows etc at galleries, and can't think of a time this has actually even happened. They certainly may talk about the strengths of it to individuals who show a particular interest in it, but unless they say, "would you like to meet the artist?" (which you can also specify to them not to do in your pre-emptive talk), you don't have to be put on the spot. You can just mill about at times when you are comfortable doing so, hang out outside when you're not, etc. Also, you could bring a friend to talk to (ie., even those there who might know you) so you can already appear occupied in conversation.
Thanks for this!
Ryask
  #6  
Old Dec 22, 2010, 02:09 AM
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Ryask Ryask is offline
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Well...it didn't kill me...lol, i stayed by the door....but that wasn't too bad..i talked with my husband..and he really just made me laugh the whole time...he would be silly like "see the woman in the red sweater...i bet she's a swinger" just making comments about people in the room it totally took me out of the scary situation and just had to laugh..he really is sweet, and he does try really hard to just be very supportive, he knew how i felt and just stayed by me the whole time..and when people would come looking they wanted to talk he would just hug me and whisper something funny in my ear...it made them turn and leave me alone haha. The did however call my name to accept a gift but he held my hand and walked me up i didn't have to say anything but thank you..and then he took me back to the door...i wish everyone could have that kinda support, i really am lucky to have him, and maybe he does understand more then i think.
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"Love is patient; love is kind; love is not boastful or arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice in wrongdoing, but rejoices in the truth. It bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things". I Corinthians 13: 4-7
Thanks for this!
Trippin2.0
  #7  
Old Dec 22, 2010, 02:18 AM
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sundog sundog is offline
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Yay! Well done for making it through the evening!!! That's great, Ryask!!!! And I'm so glad you have such a supportive hubby
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Peace is every step
~ Thich Nhat Hanh
  #8  
Old Dec 22, 2010, 04:51 AM
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Ryask Ryask is offline
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oh BTW two of my photographs won....one was put in a calendar and the other for get well cards they send to seniors. I'm gonna share em see what you all think
Attached Images
File Type: jpg westcove.jpg (99.2 KB, 3 views)
File Type: jpg berries.jpg (96.5 KB, 3 views)
__________________
"Love is patient; love is kind; love is not boastful or arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice in wrongdoing, but rejoices in the truth. It bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things". I Corinthians 13: 4-7
  #9  
Old Dec 22, 2010, 06:13 AM
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polyonamous polyonamous is offline
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Congratulations Ryask! I love westcove BTW!
overcoming fears like that is fabulous, you are so strong!

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  #10  
Old Dec 22, 2010, 07:24 AM
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sugahorse1 sugahorse1 is offline
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Lovely pics! Glad you made it through the evening - it was a challenge for you, and you managed to get through it - great stuff

I hope you can appreciate how well you've done, and use it as inspiration for when you are in a similar situation
((Ryask))
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  #11  
Old Dec 22, 2010, 01:10 PM
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Beautiful pictures! And one more hurdle jumped! Proud of you!
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