First pdoc appointment

Next Tuesday is my first pdoc appointment. I'm so nervous. My T actually worked with this pdoc years ago when she was doing her intern at a treatment center. She said he's great and was glad I finally took the step to make an appointment.

Anyway, my appointment is 2hrs long. The first hour is paperwork What should I expect for this first appointment? My GP had signed me up for a program that gives you a care manager and helps you get into remission, but she said if I am diagnosed with BP2 I won't be eligible for the program because I will need direct contact with a pdoc not just a case manager. Anyway, she knew my T and I signed the release for her and my Drs to discuss me, and my GP immediately sent an order over for me to be seen by a psych because him, the case manager and my T all think I am BP2.

I'm not sure where this is going. I went to bed feeling blah and just like I didn't care if I woke up this morning. Not sad, just empty. Now I'm fighting back tears, trying to put on a smile and happy act for my husband and kids and all I want to do is disappear. I hate the ups and downs all the time, it's a never ending roller coaster that I'd rather jump off of.

Seeing a Pdoc is a big step.
The paperwork always scares me too. When I said this to my current Pdoc she laughed and said that many people have a hard time with it and are not able to answer all the questions. That is part of why the first session is so long. It sounds like you are going to see a good Pdoc. Remember... they are just people... people that spent way too long in school... but people.